Ha ha Ha ha Ha ha Ha ha Ha!...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good......
Pity's stacking up on A.G.Bell's back.
Gotta let it show 'cause they don't know Jack
So as we stand on Our feet, a fine place to be
We won't give up the bounty, 'cause We're truly Free
We've got a whole new vision, just forget about fear.
Throw out folly and sound that we hardly hear.
And all We wanna see is the message reap...
Our dreams, they know this, because We don't get sleep, no..
Handwaves, Handwaves over land.
Turn forever, Hand in Hand
Take it all there, steer their Ride
They are sinking, losing ground.
Deaf forever Deaf is Free
C'mon forever You and Me
Handwaves, Handwaves across land
Is Everybody IN?
Yep...Yep...Yep...
Deaf Good INc. can be had as we act upon:
INvitation...
INteraction..
INclusion...
INvolvement...
INspiration...
Yep! Yep! Yep!
Handwaves, Handwaves over land.
Turn forever, Hand in Hand
Take it all there, steer their Ride
They are sinking, losing ground.
Deaf forever Deaf is Free
C'mon forever You and Me
Handwaves, Handwaves across land
Is Everybody IN?
Get on your Feet...
Gotta beat the heat!
Watch us get together...
Gonna make it real!
We are Birds of Feather...
Sharing how we feel!
DEAF GOOD...
Whoooey...
DYUSA-AustIN!
Yeeehaw...
DYUSA-AustIN!
Oooh Yea!...
DYUSA-AustIN!
CommUnIty!
I'm INspired,...
...and of course, I am IN!
So what about U?
CommUnIty.
EveryONE is INvited!
[INfluenced by GORILLAZ]
Ha! ha! Ha! ha! Ha! ha! Ha! ha! Ha!
chicp
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Volume Control
You know, I'm sitting there at this restaurant with my hearing family and we're sitting around a rectangle of a table. My family doesn't know sign language and I can't equally decipher what each person's lips are flapping with so in situations like these, I just go into a zone. My own thoughts consume me...
Observe the place.
Take note of the lighting.
The mood of it.
The menu.
I check out the waitress...hmm...not bad!
She's cute. I wink at her. Hello Pretty!
Me folks around the table are chattering and paying little attention to what they will order. Do they even know what they want?
Jabber.
Natter.
Yadda-yadda.
I summon our beautiful waitress over to my seat and instead of verbally ordering my dinner, I point out what I want and use a little gesturing to emphasize that I'll have it cooked Medium Rare.
Soft and a little red.
I also point out that I'd like a pint of Dos Equis with lime. She gets it and smiles with appreciation that I've made up my mind as to what I will be eating. This little appreciation goes unnoticed by the others at our table but I motion to her to go ahead and poke at my old man. He usually has an immediate idea as to what he wants to eat.
Everyone slowly takes their time to make their orders complete. The waitress continues to grab glimpses of me while I'm just sitting there observing the way people in my family make their orders.
"No Garnish"
"I want this but without that"
"Can you put the mushrooms on the side?"
Picky and time consuming they are!
So there I am checking out the floor, the ceiling, the other customers, and yawning all the while. You see, I've always hated this kind of crap because it is all stupid and lame. I'd rather be at MY house cooking MY steak with MY beer in MY hand. I never did like sitting around asking people what they're talking about every god damned 5 minutes.
People are too absorbed in the mix of it all. Talkative and inattentive at the same time. They've seen me deal with this crap for 32 years and they still want to include me at such gatherings and functions because I'm a part of the family. One would think inclusion goes beyond the invitation itself. Nah, I'm a statue that can twiddle thumbs. Bored out of my mind with the monotony of this familial bullshit.
Yes, I love them.
Yet, I'm damn tired.
Tired of the same old shit.
Different Day.
I NO LIKE!
While we wait, I approach my father with a question:
"Did you order a beer, if so what kind?"
He asks me to repeat what I said and I did.
This time he is interrupted by a question from my aunt and so I wait patiently for them to wrap that interference up. I wait. I wait some more. I wait a good while and they're still talking. Fed up with the waiting, I again ask my old man, "Didja order a beer? What'd ya get?"
He responds requesting that I speak up louder.
I speak louder.
He again asks me to speaker even louder.
I do it a notch louder and with an expression of frustration and distraction, Dad gestures with his hand to speak up LOUDER!
I, having had my patience stretched and my boredom served, rise from my chair and YELL loudly: "Look Dad, all I wanted to know was what you are ordering to drink. BIG FUCKING DEAL, right?!"
After this burst of booming agony, I had all eyes in that building looking at me in disbelief. I look at them with a face of anger and grimace.
"What the hell are you all looking at? EAT, DRINK, AND BE MERRY, MOTHAFUCKAS!"
Dad grabs me by the arm and tells me to sit down because I've spoken TOO LOUD.
Argh!...you just can't win with these selfish and arrogant bastards.
The waitress immediately brings me my beer and says that it's on the house.
NICE!
32 years, yo!
I'm tired.
Observe the place.
Take note of the lighting.
The mood of it.
The menu.
I check out the waitress...hmm...not bad!
She's cute. I wink at her. Hello Pretty!
Me folks around the table are chattering and paying little attention to what they will order. Do they even know what they want?
Jabber.
Natter.
Yadda-yadda.
I summon our beautiful waitress over to my seat and instead of verbally ordering my dinner, I point out what I want and use a little gesturing to emphasize that I'll have it cooked Medium Rare.
Soft and a little red.
I also point out that I'd like a pint of Dos Equis with lime. She gets it and smiles with appreciation that I've made up my mind as to what I will be eating. This little appreciation goes unnoticed by the others at our table but I motion to her to go ahead and poke at my old man. He usually has an immediate idea as to what he wants to eat.
Everyone slowly takes their time to make their orders complete. The waitress continues to grab glimpses of me while I'm just sitting there observing the way people in my family make their orders.
"No Garnish"
"I want this but without that"
"Can you put the mushrooms on the side?"
Picky and time consuming they are!
So there I am checking out the floor, the ceiling, the other customers, and yawning all the while. You see, I've always hated this kind of crap because it is all stupid and lame. I'd rather be at MY house cooking MY steak with MY beer in MY hand. I never did like sitting around asking people what they're talking about every god damned 5 minutes.
People are too absorbed in the mix of it all. Talkative and inattentive at the same time. They've seen me deal with this crap for 32 years and they still want to include me at such gatherings and functions because I'm a part of the family. One would think inclusion goes beyond the invitation itself. Nah, I'm a statue that can twiddle thumbs. Bored out of my mind with the monotony of this familial bullshit.
Yes, I love them.
Yet, I'm damn tired.
Tired of the same old shit.
Different Day.
I NO LIKE!
While we wait, I approach my father with a question:
"Did you order a beer, if so what kind?"
He asks me to repeat what I said and I did.
This time he is interrupted by a question from my aunt and so I wait patiently for them to wrap that interference up. I wait. I wait some more. I wait a good while and they're still talking. Fed up with the waiting, I again ask my old man, "Didja order a beer? What'd ya get?"
He responds requesting that I speak up louder.
I speak louder.
He again asks me to speaker even louder.
I do it a notch louder and with an expression of frustration and distraction, Dad gestures with his hand to speak up LOUDER!
I, having had my patience stretched and my boredom served, rise from my chair and YELL loudly: "Look Dad, all I wanted to know was what you are ordering to drink. BIG FUCKING DEAL, right?!"
After this burst of booming agony, I had all eyes in that building looking at me in disbelief. I look at them with a face of anger and grimace.
"What the hell are you all looking at? EAT, DRINK, AND BE MERRY, MOTHAFUCKAS!"
Dad grabs me by the arm and tells me to sit down because I've spoken TOO LOUD.
Argh!...you just can't win with these selfish and arrogant bastards.
The waitress immediately brings me my beer and says that it's on the house.
NICE!
32 years, yo!
I'm tired.
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Adios!
OOOH A Conspiracy Theory:
When the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing saw that a website like DeafRead could be used as a tool for a movement. They worried. When they saw what happened to Jane K. Fernandes. They fretted. When they saw the number of hits coming in on a daily basis. They began to sweat.
Something must be done...
So what did they do? They let some money do some talking and had some shares acquired with the expectation that this would never happen again. Money and contracts actually shut people up and they're known as sell outs.
Hey YOU! I know you!
What's up?
Yet, I ain't gonna argue with the likes of them because it is really useless. They're in the business for the money and they don't care too much about social justice or equality. Deafness sells and Deaf doesn't. Deafness garners sponsors and includes more people than the culturally Deaf. Audism practiced under the guise of diversity. Ha!
Now I'll put it short and sweet:
Oh, the old gray mare, she ain't what she used to be,
Ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be.
Whoooo-ey!
If you look at 'em now. You'll see that they're just trudging through molasses and relying on a few inept writers in order to keep above the surface. Writers who tell of opinions and what-have-ye. Writers who argue that the majority of Deaf people cannot read. Writers who claim that Deaf people are inconsiderate of the hearing majority. Writers who are simply status quo joes.
You see, I, too, am a writer and I do it because I love it. The Deaf related stuff I usually post here, yet the real good stuff,...that is for posthumous publication. What I share with you here is only my testimony and observations as a Deaf man and yes, I know who and what I am. I'm DeafJeff and mighty proud of it. I am who I am because I was raised the way I was. I've seen quite a bit, I know how they work, and how they manipulate things. So deny all you want,...there IS a corporate agenda that uses children and parents as pawns.
Hello.
I there before.
Saw finish.
Know Know.
Me dumb not.
As for DeafRead, Two Main Points:
User friendly? Hell No.
Recognize audism? Pffft.
What is more,..they've yet to remove my blog. Yep, I sent the "bossman" an email requesting that my blog be removed. That was Thursday, July 14th. *ahem*
Why am I leaving DeafRead?
Because it is for the birds.
So,...with this post,...I bid thee farewell DeafRead, yet I'll still continue to blog and vlog, just not through the means of patronizing your place.
Hasta.
I'm out.
When the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing saw that a website like DeafRead could be used as a tool for a movement. They worried. When they saw what happened to Jane K. Fernandes. They fretted. When they saw the number of hits coming in on a daily basis. They began to sweat.
Something must be done...
So what did they do? They let some money do some talking and had some shares acquired with the expectation that this would never happen again. Money and contracts actually shut people up and they're known as sell outs.
Hey YOU! I know you!
What's up?
Yet, I ain't gonna argue with the likes of them because it is really useless. They're in the business for the money and they don't care too much about social justice or equality. Deafness sells and Deaf doesn't. Deafness garners sponsors and includes more people than the culturally Deaf. Audism practiced under the guise of diversity. Ha!
Now I'll put it short and sweet:
Oh, the old gray mare, she ain't what she used to be,
Ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be.
Whoooo-ey!
If you look at 'em now. You'll see that they're just trudging through molasses and relying on a few inept writers in order to keep above the surface. Writers who tell of opinions and what-have-ye. Writers who argue that the majority of Deaf people cannot read. Writers who claim that Deaf people are inconsiderate of the hearing majority. Writers who are simply status quo joes.
You see, I, too, am a writer and I do it because I love it. The Deaf related stuff I usually post here, yet the real good stuff,...that is for posthumous publication. What I share with you here is only my testimony and observations as a Deaf man and yes, I know who and what I am. I'm DeafJeff and mighty proud of it. I am who I am because I was raised the way I was. I've seen quite a bit, I know how they work, and how they manipulate things. So deny all you want,...there IS a corporate agenda that uses children and parents as pawns.
Hello.
I there before.
Saw finish.
Know Know.
Me dumb not.
As for DeafRead, Two Main Points:
User friendly? Hell No.
Recognize audism? Pffft.
What is more,..they've yet to remove my blog. Yep, I sent the "bossman" an email requesting that my blog be removed. That was Thursday, July 14th. *ahem*
Why am I leaving DeafRead?
Because it is for the birds.
So,...with this post,...I bid thee farewell DeafRead, yet I'll still continue to blog and vlog, just not through the means of patronizing your place.
Hasta.
I'm out.
Monday, July 11, 2011
Can you hear me now?
First we kindly asked you to leave.
You refused.
Then we TOLD you to leave.
You, again, refused.
You were obnoxiously rude and profane.
A fucking drunk!
You're screaming and waking everyone up and calling them "Motherfuckers!" Woman, it is three in the morning and we're trying to get some sleep. Yea,...SLEEP not drunk. Capisce!
BUT oh no no no,...you were looking for a fight. You brought out the claws. You were aiming for trouble and oh no no no....we weren't having any of it. We asked. We told ya. You didn't care!
That's where YOU fucked up. That's where you slipped and I grabbed ya and moved you into the hall. You wanted to throw a punch. You wanted the shit to go down. You kept at it so then I grabbed you once more and I threw your sorry ass outside. Slammed the door and I locked ya out!
Now that is taking out the trash, yo.
You drive by 2 days later and use the only sign language you know. "Fuck You!" and I'm like awright....I done seen it. You come back by and I'm like "Hey! What the fuck is that shit all about and you're like,....yadda yadda yadda bitch bitch bitch la la la la la THEN you say:
"Get the fuck out of my way you deaf motherfucker Huh? Huh! Can you hear me now? Huh? What? That's right! I thought so!"
So you pull that card out and I'm like uh-huh....right.....you're calling me deaf when woman,...
You can hear and yet, you don't listen for shit.
Now tell me who is deaf?
Eh? Huh? What?
Be awright.
You refused.
Then we TOLD you to leave.
You, again, refused.
You were obnoxiously rude and profane.
A fucking drunk!
You're screaming and waking everyone up and calling them "Motherfuckers!" Woman, it is three in the morning and we're trying to get some sleep. Yea,...SLEEP not drunk. Capisce!
BUT oh no no no,...you were looking for a fight. You brought out the claws. You were aiming for trouble and oh no no no....we weren't having any of it. We asked. We told ya. You didn't care!
That's where YOU fucked up. That's where you slipped and I grabbed ya and moved you into the hall. You wanted to throw a punch. You wanted the shit to go down. You kept at it so then I grabbed you once more and I threw your sorry ass outside. Slammed the door and I locked ya out!
Now that is taking out the trash, yo.
You drive by 2 days later and use the only sign language you know. "Fuck You!" and I'm like awright....I done seen it. You come back by and I'm like "Hey! What the fuck is that shit all about and you're like,....yadda yadda yadda bitch bitch bitch la la la la la THEN you say:
"Get the fuck out of my way you deaf motherfucker Huh? Huh! Can you hear me now? Huh? What? That's right! I thought so!"
So you pull that card out and I'm like uh-huh....right.....you're calling me deaf when woman,...
You can hear and yet, you don't listen for shit.
Now tell me who is deaf?
Eh? Huh? What?
Be awright.
Saturday, July 2, 2011
Repetitions
A question for you, a question for me, a question for us all to see…
For us all to see…see…see…
Ah, so you don’t like the term audism and you don’t wish to see yourself associated with this "thing" called Deafhood?
Well, then I reckon that should go on to tell me that you’ve pretty much settled for yourself what is most suiting for you and where you belong, thus there is no need to meddle with discussions relating to the above mentioned terms, aye?
If that be the case, then you might not find what I have to say to be the least bit interesting, however, you are more than welcome to place your eyes on this piece and stick your nose in the stink of it all. I mean, after all, if we don’t clean it up now, who will? What of the stench? Oh the trouble!
So what is it going to be, eh?
Propaganda!
Ah, I guess if you’ve read this far, then I can surely say we best carry on and not tarry, jes? Besides, you’re obviously curious enough to know where I’m going to take this and I best do my duty of entertaining you to the fullest so that you may see.
So that they may see…see…see…
Audism: the shit that happens when you’re not treated like an equal in a hearing world and it happens to every fool who has less than perfect hearing. You see, whether aided or implanted, oral or mute, that audist shit happens, so suck it up and deal with it because it IS there.
Okay,… if you’re one to say that shit doesn’t happen to you, well then I guess I could say they (the audist pigs, parents’ shame, et al) did a good job programming your ass to slap on a smile and nod every time you don’t understand shit when you’ve already asked them twice to repeat. Either that or you just don’t give a fuck what they say while you wear your best poker face.
Alas!
You are a success!
You see, asking people to continuously repeat themselves multiple times is considered “effective communication” with no emotional or psychological side effects whatsoever. It beats being a mute eh?
HA! That’s what they think.
Deafhood: the journey one takes from being ashamed to being proud of their being deaf. If you don’t recognize the word, we know where you stand and we will wait for YOU when you’re ready. Nothing more need be said. Now, if you recognize the word but keep arguing with yourself about it, break the mirror and buy another mask, or better yet, pull the trigger. That’d be one less puppet on the stage. Otherwise, stand tall!
*commercial break*
The following commercial was made possible by A Great Big Association of the Deaf (AGBAD) and readers like you:
“HEY!
Support your local deaf community: buy firecrackers, subwoofers, foghorns, jet engines, or anything that can promote severe to profound hearing loss and max it out. Surely you can help our community grow, one ear at a time, baby!”
*drum roll*
Ladies and Gentlemen!
In the stink of it all…it is:
auditorization: a process enforced upon deaf children to make them act or think like hearing people. This alone teaches the child, from the beginning, that in the minds of hearing people, they should strive to develop an identity other than their own because being deaf is bad, no good, evil, and unacceptable. This process also creates fine bullshitters and naysayers who blindly support the corporate agendas that are killing cultures across the globe, namely their own. Humans. Ha ha ha!
Aye, let us break it all down so that you can truly see.
So that they may truly see…see…see…
Methods of Auditorization:
1. Segregation and isolation from signed languages and users of them.
2. Forced to focus on speech and hearing rather than solid language acquisition.
3. Curriculum reflects that of the dominant hearing culture.
4. Textbooks and testing reflect that of the dominant hearing culture.
5. Denial of the pupil’s natural learning abilities (visual and manual).
6. Teachers are role models for the hearing culture.
And what of the home schooled?
Hey there, they’re the home fooled.
Truer learning happens out of nests and out from under wings.
Where they can, for themselves, finally see.
Finally see,…see…see…
Now, now now, I want you to look at the above list with an open mind and heart. I want you to look beyond your own account of being deaf and consider the whole, if you will. Many of us come from that 90% who were born into hearing families and were mainstreamed or onestreamed or fuckstreamed or what have ye, with no notion of a proud deaf culture. We were more familiar with the terms hearing impaired and hard of hearing than we were of the term deaf and if there were any one word we did know, it would be the word, deafness.
“Pardon the interruption, but may I please have your attention. The above word deafness is misspelled and we would like to apologize for the inconvenience it may have caused. We leave you with the correct spelling, which is: M-O-N-E-Y. That is correct: deafness is spelled: M-O-N-E-Y. Again, we apologize for the inconvenience and we thank you for your patience. (blip)”
We knew these words from the doctors, specialists, parents, and educators who love and believe that their country is the best in the world, that we have the best medicine, the best technology, the best beliefs, and the best of the best in all things.
God Bless America!
We stood in class every morning saying the pledge of allegiance to the flag of the United States of America wearing some hearing aid, auditory trainer, phonic ear, or implant that made some artificial sounds, which were to many of us, useless. We stood like tireless soldiers for hearing ideals and don’t you forget, we were never good enough to serve in the armed forces like Grandpappy did, but hey, they wouldn’t tell you that, right? We were too busy straining our minds in keeping up with the right lip movements at the right time, the right sound and the right tone. And justice for all.
Sir Yes Sir!
-salutes-
The whole time they’re trying to teach us something using speech and hearing, they fail to notice that it is primarily our observations that clue us in on what is the right and wrong thing to do, what earns rewards and what does not. Pretty soon we master the methods used and eventually we find ourselves being a “model” child, not for other deaf children, but for PARENTS of deaf children.
*commercial break*
-On Deaf People-
God to Man: I created them that way.
Man to God: Thanks for the charity.
“Hey PuppetBoy!
You better talk and sing sweetly so I can sell more puppets that look like you. Only you, my precious PuppetBoy, are blessed with such abilities, while the rest are merely pieces of wood I need to get rid of.
Go on and get about talking the way you do. I need my M-O-N-E-Y or else you’re going to burn in yonder fire!”
*hat tip*
Because our wasp assed government has not officially recognized the cultural and linguistic values of our country’s signing deaf community, our politicians end up supporting the auditorization of deaf children because it garners them more support from lobbyists and corporate interests (money) that help them stay in office and such, in return, helps corporations stay in business. This whole situation has long since made it difficult, if not impossible, to educate all deaf children successfully and it has ultimately divided all of us who share the experience of having less than perfect hearing.
That is their agenda:
Make us weak.
Make them strong.
Make whom strong?
Those with the Lie Abilities.
To me, the saddest thing about it is not that we are discriminated upon by the ignorance of hearing people but such ignorance is supported by those who are ashamed to be deaf, hard of hearing, or users of American Sign Language.
*commercial break*
-A Good Business Sketch-
Business: The day when every deaf child receives an implant:
(not real figures, numbnuts!)
1 in 1000 babies born are born deaf every day.
3000 babies born every day = 3 deaf babies a day.
3 deaf babies a day multiplied by 30,000 dollar implants = 90,000 dollars projected
90,000 dollars projected a day means a projected 27,400,000 dollars annually.
If every child had 2 implants at 30,000 each the projected annual would be: 54,800,000
Good for the USA!
You see, as technology continues to improve, kids will eventually have to return to the operating room to get “maintenance and repair”. Replace older and outdated technology with a newer and more expensive one. They cannot live without the synthetic shit you have given them. You’ve got ‘em hookt on fonics.
C.I. Kenny says:
“Mah mommer caint pays fer a newtwon cuss she done spent her ever las penner on thuh one I gots in mah heyad.”
Don’t worry you sonny, we got payment plans to help you get double drilled! We got the connections to help with hearing directions.
C.I. Kenny says:
“imma sine me upon a pizza paper says I get a double dwillin in mah heyad. Dey’s gots thuh cuh cuh cuh nekssssss shuns tuh healp me hur butter.”
.
*microphone feedback*
If you made it all the way down here and have enjoyed it, thank you for reading. If you read it and feel sour or do not find this appealing to your taste, I apologize. I only want to express my sentiments, just that and only that.
Until the next one,
D.B. Shitehead
For us all to see…see…see…
Ah, so you don’t like the term audism and you don’t wish to see yourself associated with this "thing" called Deafhood?
Well, then I reckon that should go on to tell me that you’ve pretty much settled for yourself what is most suiting for you and where you belong, thus there is no need to meddle with discussions relating to the above mentioned terms, aye?
If that be the case, then you might not find what I have to say to be the least bit interesting, however, you are more than welcome to place your eyes on this piece and stick your nose in the stink of it all. I mean, after all, if we don’t clean it up now, who will? What of the stench? Oh the trouble!
So what is it going to be, eh?
Propaganda!
Ah, I guess if you’ve read this far, then I can surely say we best carry on and not tarry, jes? Besides, you’re obviously curious enough to know where I’m going to take this and I best do my duty of entertaining you to the fullest so that you may see.
So that they may see…see…see…
Audism: the shit that happens when you’re not treated like an equal in a hearing world and it happens to every fool who has less than perfect hearing. You see, whether aided or implanted, oral or mute, that audist shit happens, so suck it up and deal with it because it IS there.
Okay,… if you’re one to say that shit doesn’t happen to you, well then I guess I could say they (the audist pigs, parents’ shame, et al) did a good job programming your ass to slap on a smile and nod every time you don’t understand shit when you’ve already asked them twice to repeat. Either that or you just don’t give a fuck what they say while you wear your best poker face.
Alas!
You are a success!
You see, asking people to continuously repeat themselves multiple times is considered “effective communication” with no emotional or psychological side effects whatsoever. It beats being a mute eh?
HA! That’s what they think.
Deafhood: the journey one takes from being ashamed to being proud of their being deaf. If you don’t recognize the word, we know where you stand and we will wait for YOU when you’re ready. Nothing more need be said. Now, if you recognize the word but keep arguing with yourself about it, break the mirror and buy another mask, or better yet, pull the trigger. That’d be one less puppet on the stage. Otherwise, stand tall!
*commercial break*
The following commercial was made possible by A Great Big Association of the Deaf (AGBAD) and readers like you:
“HEY!
Support your local deaf community: buy firecrackers, subwoofers, foghorns, jet engines, or anything that can promote severe to profound hearing loss and max it out. Surely you can help our community grow, one ear at a time, baby!”
*drum roll*
Ladies and Gentlemen!
In the stink of it all…it is:
auditorization: a process enforced upon deaf children to make them act or think like hearing people. This alone teaches the child, from the beginning, that in the minds of hearing people, they should strive to develop an identity other than their own because being deaf is bad, no good, evil, and unacceptable. This process also creates fine bullshitters and naysayers who blindly support the corporate agendas that are killing cultures across the globe, namely their own. Humans. Ha ha ha!
Aye, let us break it all down so that you can truly see.
So that they may truly see…see…see…
Methods of Auditorization:
1. Segregation and isolation from signed languages and users of them.
2. Forced to focus on speech and hearing rather than solid language acquisition.
3. Curriculum reflects that of the dominant hearing culture.
4. Textbooks and testing reflect that of the dominant hearing culture.
5. Denial of the pupil’s natural learning abilities (visual and manual).
6. Teachers are role models for the hearing culture.
And what of the home schooled?
Hey there, they’re the home fooled.
Truer learning happens out of nests and out from under wings.
Where they can, for themselves, finally see.
Finally see,…see…see…
Now, now now, I want you to look at the above list with an open mind and heart. I want you to look beyond your own account of being deaf and consider the whole, if you will. Many of us come from that 90% who were born into hearing families and were mainstreamed or onestreamed or fuckstreamed or what have ye, with no notion of a proud deaf culture. We were more familiar with the terms hearing impaired and hard of hearing than we were of the term deaf and if there were any one word we did know, it would be the word, deafness.
“Pardon the interruption, but may I please have your attention. The above word deafness is misspelled and we would like to apologize for the inconvenience it may have caused. We leave you with the correct spelling, which is: M-O-N-E-Y. That is correct: deafness is spelled: M-O-N-E-Y. Again, we apologize for the inconvenience and we thank you for your patience. (blip)”
We knew these words from the doctors, specialists, parents, and educators who love and believe that their country is the best in the world, that we have the best medicine, the best technology, the best beliefs, and the best of the best in all things.
God Bless America!
We stood in class every morning saying the pledge of allegiance to the flag of the United States of America wearing some hearing aid, auditory trainer, phonic ear, or implant that made some artificial sounds, which were to many of us, useless. We stood like tireless soldiers for hearing ideals and don’t you forget, we were never good enough to serve in the armed forces like Grandpappy did, but hey, they wouldn’t tell you that, right? We were too busy straining our minds in keeping up with the right lip movements at the right time, the right sound and the right tone. And justice for all.
Sir Yes Sir!
-salutes-
The whole time they’re trying to teach us something using speech and hearing, they fail to notice that it is primarily our observations that clue us in on what is the right and wrong thing to do, what earns rewards and what does not. Pretty soon we master the methods used and eventually we find ourselves being a “model” child, not for other deaf children, but for PARENTS of deaf children.
*commercial break*
-On Deaf People-
God to Man: I created them that way.
Man to God: Thanks for the charity.
“Hey PuppetBoy!
You better talk and sing sweetly so I can sell more puppets that look like you. Only you, my precious PuppetBoy, are blessed with such abilities, while the rest are merely pieces of wood I need to get rid of.
Go on and get about talking the way you do. I need my M-O-N-E-Y or else you’re going to burn in yonder fire!”
*hat tip*
Because our wasp assed government has not officially recognized the cultural and linguistic values of our country’s signing deaf community, our politicians end up supporting the auditorization of deaf children because it garners them more support from lobbyists and corporate interests (money) that help them stay in office and such, in return, helps corporations stay in business. This whole situation has long since made it difficult, if not impossible, to educate all deaf children successfully and it has ultimately divided all of us who share the experience of having less than perfect hearing.
That is their agenda:
Make us weak.
Make them strong.
Make whom strong?
Those with the Lie Abilities.
To me, the saddest thing about it is not that we are discriminated upon by the ignorance of hearing people but such ignorance is supported by those who are ashamed to be deaf, hard of hearing, or users of American Sign Language.
*commercial break*
-A Good Business Sketch-
Business: The day when every deaf child receives an implant:
(not real figures, numbnuts!)
1 in 1000 babies born are born deaf every day.
3000 babies born every day = 3 deaf babies a day.
3 deaf babies a day multiplied by 30,000 dollar implants = 90,000 dollars projected
90,000 dollars projected a day means a projected 27,400,000 dollars annually.
If every child had 2 implants at 30,000 each the projected annual would be: 54,800,000
Good for the USA!
You see, as technology continues to improve, kids will eventually have to return to the operating room to get “maintenance and repair”. Replace older and outdated technology with a newer and more expensive one. They cannot live without the synthetic shit you have given them. You’ve got ‘em hookt on fonics.
C.I. Kenny says:
“Mah mommer caint pays fer a newtwon cuss she done spent her ever las penner on thuh one I gots in mah heyad.”
Don’t worry you sonny, we got payment plans to help you get double drilled! We got the connections to help with hearing directions.
C.I. Kenny says:
“imma sine me upon a pizza paper says I get a double dwillin in mah heyad. Dey’s gots thuh cuh cuh cuh nekssssss shuns tuh healp me hur butter.”
.
*microphone feedback*
If you made it all the way down here and have enjoyed it, thank you for reading. If you read it and feel sour or do not find this appealing to your taste, I apologize. I only want to express my sentiments, just that and only that.
Until the next one,
D.B. Shitehead
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