The Terlinguan

Homeland Insecurities

2012-01-19T09:58:00.000-08:00

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness." -Declaration of Independence, July 4th, 1776

Dear "Friends",

You sure disappointed me when it was confirmed that you were involved with all the twists that have been going on here along the border and I say border because that is precisely why YOU are here. Specifically speaking, Terlingua, Texas, U.S.A.

To protect the Homeland, not the People.

You should be ashamed of the fact that you deliberately lied to me and my family, sincere people, about why you are here and leading us to believe that we, you and I, were here for the same reasons: that we love the Chihuahuan Desert and dwell in it because she teaches and she provides us with happiness; that we can enjoy Freedom with her and other fellow inhabitants.

Nuestra Casa.

Yet, I've come to find out, your reasons are absolutely related to your career. A career that deals with manipulation and corruption in order to obtain information over a given jurisdiction, which has now covered everything between here and there. A career that pays you to encroach upon the civil liberties of a Free People and in doing so, you have jeopardized Freedom. In other words, make others miserable.

You see, the thing I find most irritating about it all, you aside, is that we have steered from the fundamentals that were laid out by our forefathers in that this would be a sovereign nation where power is ultimately in the hands of the People.

Yet, of course, when the People's rights have been infringed, the Constitution becomes obsolete, Freedom ceases to exist, and the People are left powerless.

It's truly disturbing to find that I have "friends" who have aided and abetted in the slow eradication of a Democracy and pushed for, whether knowingly or not, a Fascist State. The least you, a friend, could do is acknowledge these things and apologize for your part in it. Otherwise, you'll find, that true friends will be hard to come by and without them, you'll forever be surrounded with doubt and distrust.

Please don't tell me you were simply doing your job. YOU lied to me and I am a person of the People who you are supposed to protect. How does lying to us protect the People? So it's your call, take a vacation and ponder over these truths, or not and if you can't feel sorry about all of this, do not, I stress, talk or even attempt to talk to me anymore.

Yours,
Deaf Jeff

P.S.
The River will NEVER divide us.
Never has and never will.

Somos Vecinos en un Mundo de la Verdad.

What the Deaf Man Heard

2012-01-17T14:38:00.000-08:00

Terlingua is and has been swarming with a network of undercover agents who are constantly snooping around trying to get the latest and greatest of the current events that go on out here in our beloved desert and I always marvel at how they, the agents, believe their cover works.

Ba-ha-ha-ha!

"Oh even if he thinks we're cops, we can alter the circumstances in ways that will cause his mental state to collapse and the rest of them will see that he is losing his marbles. The Investigation will go on."

Right.
I can smell a pig from miles away no matter how well they play the part or how new they are to the investigation.

a-YUP!

Seriously, your cover is blown and it has been for some time now. YET because I am a compassionate person who understands that some people just HAVE to make a living as they got lives to support and bills to pay back "home", I'll hold out on publishing your names and explaining your part in the current investigation. SEE? I'm nice. YOU are not.

I know ALL of you, your informants as well as the victims of your deception. I mean, how can you continue to pry into the lives of others, acknowledge their truths, know their strengths and weaknesses, and all the while pretend to be a genuine and sincere person?

Fuck your clearance and authorization.

YOU are a liar.
Simple as that.
A fake person.

And you wonder why most people get a funny feeling about ya....

Surely you can't feel good about that. If you don't care...ouch...you're heartless bastards. SO, as a fair warning, stay the fuck away from me and my family because your intentions, unlike mine, are foul and of much ill will. Tu me entiendes?

Oh,..and I DO have PROOF that goes several years back...
Tsk..Tsk..Tsk..All that hard work.....and for what?

OH,..we're living in FuNnY Times...

P.S. This is not a joke or a bluff. This is real. And for my faithful readers, please know that there will be no such thing as an accidental death, suicide, car wreck, natural causes, or anything of that sort. Just Murder. On THEIR part.

OOOOH,...when the shit goes down,...you better be ready!

Check, Check, Check, Check it out!:

http://yourlife.usatoday.com/health/story/2012-01-16/Study-Deaf-signers-quick-to-interpret-body-language/52591902/1

Alexander Graham Bell: The Man AND the Association

2012-01-04T09:39:00.000-08:00

People have long since argued that the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing and the man himself are two separate entities and I intend to help you understand why they are one and the same. You see, Bell believed that all Deaf children be should be restored to society through a learning regimen that placed the ability to speak and hear ABOVE/OVER the ability to independently inquire and effectively acquire information as a person of the hands and eyes. With this said, it is clearly seen how the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing was founded with the intention of educating the Deaf and hard of hearing solely through speech and hearing and selfishly disregarding strong evidence of what is effective in developing a fundamental sense of knowledge in Deaf pupils.

If the association were separate from the man for which it is named, it would have long since ceased compliance to the man's beliefs and ideals.

Has it? NO.

If the association were separate from the man for which it is named, it would provide continued support to those who do not procure intelligible speech or the use of hearing technology.

Does it? NO.

If the association were separate from the man for which is is named, it would view American Sign Language as a bona-fide language and essential to the education of Deaf children.

It DOES NOT.

All of the above is true of the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing and bear merit as prime examples of promoting an attitude towards Deaf people that is condescending, discriminating, and one that pushes for the denial of a right to language for those dependent on their hands and eyes to absorb information and communicate with the world at large.

Alexander Graham Bell, the man, strongly believed that Deaf people who cannot "speak" for themselves have no place in discussions pertaining to the education of the Deaf and equally believed that it was essential for parents and teachers to manipulate children into believing they are something they aren't, a person of the ear and voice. He has created the unfortunately long standing tradition of ignoring the needs of children of the hands and eyes and instilled in our history the selfish denial that American Sign Language IS a true and effective language in educating the Deaf. This tradition is evidenced today in the form of the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing, which continues to limit the learning opportunities of Deaf children and their families by obscuring facts with futile ideals. That alone, is the core reason why Deaf education has been ridiculously riddled with "failures" and WHY we STILL hold the association responsible.

If you disagree, leave a comment.

My child is Deaf...

2011-12-09T08:48:00.000-08:00

Let me say this again for those who haven't been there yet:

HARDCORE:
The system wants your child because he/she is deaf. They know you're hearing, Moms and Dads. They know you want your child to hear. Naturally. Right. Of course, with your child being deaf, they are not only a human being but also a golden egg waiting to hatch. You see, the system likes to apply all the consumer possibilities they can to people like you because the rich need to stay rich so they won't have to co-mingle with the likes of you. Some would call it an opinion and some would call it a fact. I'm calling it as I see it and remember,..I'm just a byproduct of the intended product.

All shit-kicking aside,...I'll stick to the center of it all.

It's perfectly fine for Moms and Dad's to want their child to hear and that is not a bad thing. I mean, if someone were to ask me what I'd suggest they decide for their deaf child. I would first admit that, a.) I am Deaf. Capital D. Enculturated YO! and b.) I have strong feelings about the idea of implantation because I'm not one to decide something that does not involve my own person or being. My body, my decision. You see, for me, I would decide that the most effective yet least invasive way to provide a language be utilized. I would not take the risks of sugery because deafness is not a matter of life and death. It is only life and Deaf.

I know the idea of living in a silent world might cause several to shudder but that is only because they have no idea or notion of what it is like. You know,...It's kinda like that first time you're on the edge of a cliff where a deep pool waits for you at the bottom. You've seen people jump off and get a thrill from doing it but you haven't done it yourself. Initially, you're scared and want to convince yourself that it is not worth it. As you watch people pass you by and continue to jump with joy into such a refreshing body of water, you begin to find the urge to do it and your curiosity won't let up. You look down far below and again feel the fear but as you hug courage and leap forward, you suddenly feel the rush of falling. You've let the fear go...

BAM! You're safe and feeling GREAT that you've finally tried it and now you can't get enough of it!

It's actually nice that I don't have hear people talking at the next table over about something that I could really care less about. It's nice that I don't have to listen to some punk assed song booming through the four way where every other word is motherfucker. It's awesome that I don't have to worry about the thunderstorms, the wind, the hail, and the coyotes keeping me up at night. I can sleep. Being Deaf doesn't dampen or depress the quality of life. It is ignorant people who believe that everyone should hear that do such damage to the life of those born deaf.

So...

I don't see anything wrong with anything you decide for your child as long as you understand that a visual and manual means of communicating with your child should be fundamental in the development of that child's mind, body, and spirit because it is natural and simple.

If your child responds to sound and can benefit from a hearing aid, then let them. If they babble and show an interest in speaking, then let them. Just make sure you always know that sign language is the sure-fire way to communicate and share information with your child without harming or altering their being and without making them stress and work for understanding. It is better to have a child who can actually respond to others with confidence in what they know and learn than to have a child who speaks with confidence but know nothing.

Believe me, I've seen my share of the system's failures and I would hate for you to come to such terms with your child.

If you're a parent with a Deaf child, please let them grow up with a sense of self worth and confidence in being who they are and do not attempt to mold them into something they are not. You see, they can be anything they aspire but be hearing and with that said, imagine the possibilities... they're infinite...

Deaf people have no limits, they just have hearing people who TRY to limit them.

Just sayin'...

You're a bad man, Charlie Barnes.

2011-10-14T09:16:00.000-07:00

No, really guys, Charlie Barnes ain't a bad man.

He just allows himself to fade away into the terrible wastes of the human mind that naturally bring one upon the "could haves and should haves" of their past. The distateful memories and perhaps the stinging pain of a lost childhood. As if one chooses to make company with Sorrow and Gloom rather than to elope with Joy and Happiness. So, there, the floodgates are opened and the alcohol comes quickly raging after the remaining brain cells of what once was a bright light.

Aye...

I can relate in more ways than one and to deny that my shit stinks only makes a roaring hypocrite out of me. I mean, sure, everyone has their own hefty baggage that they tend to drag around with them wherever they go, but not everyone learns how to deal with it in a healthy way. I took my rebellious youth and made a jump-start into what has become the life of an alcoholic. Mexico means Tequila, baby! Tuh kill ya!

Yep, you read that right!
ALCOHOLIC.

Some abhor the consumption of alcohol.
Some can take a couple drinks and hang on to sobriety.
Some drink to take a HIGH dive into an empty pool.

Puro crash and burn, dude...

You see, I waver between the last two of the three but whoooey- this guy wakes up to pissed on pants, a loss of memory, a gnarly headache, and a mournful sentiment. of course, you'll only see me walking around like I "give a flying fuck." But honestly,..deep and down,..I'm tired of this shit. I need that bright light if the forecast of the future says: Dark and Cold.

I know there IS more in me than I might be willing to recognize and in order to attain such goodness (not for the self but for the whole), I should step aside from my selfish ways and consider the good I can share with my community and loved ones.

I've said it many times before, I know...(sigh)

Listen, YO! Forget about the things that you wish you coulda done differently and focus on the things that you CAN DO NOW. So what am I doing now? I'm telling you that we all need each other more than we ever have, because, as I see it, the world is changing in ways that has moved us far from to root of our existence. By that I mean, we are divided into categories that continue to further divide us beyond acknowledging that every such division makes it furthermore difficult to come together for a common NEED.

We NEED loving sustenance.
We NEED honest conversation.
We NEED mutual respect.
We NEED love for self and others.

I know, I know,..you probably think it really sounds like some cheesy and corny assed hippy dippy sermon that sings to a empty choir but that is perfectly fine with me, you're entitled to your own and I respect that.

I'm trying,..I really am.

The point I'm trying to reach is: no matter the burden or the size baggage you haul around, we ain't got much time to waste away any more. I mean, do we really want to let the greedy machine of the artificial consume us or do we want to get back to the balance of Life as created?

Sure, Man would argue that it is his duty to improve the world for the sake of progress. Yet, what progress we have attained is merely an illusion that reinforces the very selfishness that separates us from each other. Billions of people no longer listen to the moon and the stars. The birds and bees. The clouds and the rain. The wind and the trees. The streams and the rivers. The tides and the seas.

For with the likes of me, I feed on pain and anger because I think society is pretty fucked up and brainwashed which often leaves me hopeless. So hopeless that I allow it to convince me that its better to get drunk and pass out with the world that is knocked out cold from the truth that sustains goodness.

Who could have a lamer and lousier excuse than that?

Me?
Charlie Barnes?

Nah.
You see it is no one individual or entity.
It is each and every one of us...togetha.

My Part: I can only awaken my own consciousness further and become an example in that which I believe to be just. I write these things because it must be done. I NEED to contribute towards the us and we more than the I and me. I know there is goodness in all people and that everyone is a victim of some sort.

So, Charlie, I'll tell you what I'm telling myself right now. We got to forgive ourselves and start looking ahead. Excuses won't last because the Truth always seeps in like the piss of a drunk that finds comfort in the pants of a pissant.

So stop evading facts with the idea that it is better to be pissed off than to be pissed on. In the real world, that's a lie because getting pissed off will getcha pissed on. Ultimately, we ALL have more to offer ourselves and our community and I, speaking for myself, am going to try to work on improving my place in it because these life and times together are too precious to let anger and hate destroy what GOOD there IS in it.

Of course, I'm only saying these things because I love you and to better love you all, I must love and respect myself first and foremost. Hopefully the examples we make and share will change the forecast of Tomorrow and our children may relish Life in the purest and fullest of means.

Even so,..
What do I know?

A Sign Meant To Be

2011-08-31T07:37:00.000-07:00

Dear Diary,

My Teacher gave me a deadline and I know I should at least commit to the fact that I said I would do it. I mean, nobody likes someone who says one thing and does another and that's a person who fails to walk the talk and/or is pretty much the selfish sort. I reckon I'm a little bit of both because I know what good and right is and yet I see what is bad and dark so I kind of swim between the two. Human of me, eh?

I'm no savior.
I just understand.

And besides, Life never came with a manual of instructions. You're just placed on the planet, wherever that may be and whatever the circumstances are. With that place, the environment, having it's own expectations of you, youniquely being you! They want your soul!

Shhhhh....
Hush lil baby....
Don't say a word....

If you're “savage and heathen” then you need some training and washing clean. Be an orthodox civilian. Just do not neglect the fact that this, “savage” is who we are and who we'll always be. So please know that with this story, the expectation is not of and by one person, or group or society but of the unseen and this is the farthest one may go from any civilization, past and present, real and imaginary. Ci-vi-li-za-shunnnnnnnn! Gone!

An
Assignment.
I was told.

So, my teacher wants me to tell a story and to tell it well. I don't know a better story to tell than the one I know the best, the one me heart dances with all da time. Da Troot. So, with that said, I'm going to tell you the best story I can because it is the one I feel. Some love it, some loathe it, and yet almost everyone is entertained because they DO think about these things as well. Or not.

Life.
If, being the middle word.
If all about you is...

Yes! I'm a happy and rich man. I have a person I can share my life and dreams with. One who knows and believes as I do. We have a child who brings us nothing but joy and laughter. We have ourselves wonderful animals who think the world of us because we see them as a part of the tribe. We wake up every morning to the rising Sun whilst the Chisos stretch her arms before us. The smell of creosote reminds us that we are awake from the lessons of the night. We are ever so thankful that we can listen to the rhythm of the spiritual and I, as one, know that if it wasn't for all this, I would be a poor and lonely man.

Les Miserables.
Yes, the mind is a terrible thing to waste...
...and what of the soul?

Well yes, my son Felix likes to talk about bugs. In fact, he knows that bugs rule the world. He even knows that people are pretty dim because they are too scared of bugs to understand their impact on them.

Kill 'em all!

For instance, your herbicides and pesticides and all the other goo-goo-funky-gunky-crap you like to use in your chemically dependent lifestyles and your plastic based ideologies.

Heck, you're eatin' it too!

While our motors burn oil that farts gasses and reckless drivers burn tires on tarred up blacktop, you're swimming in a pool full of chlorine and soaking up UV rays.

BURN! Brutha-Trucka! Burn...

Yup, that Felix loves bugs and he might just approach you signing the word BUGS to you. Koda POW! You SHOULD feel guilty. You're a TOXIC FIEND and a SERIAL KILLER and you've rearranged the chain because you THINK you can. My gosh, Kids just know...

Of course!

A box of seeds in the pantry is better than a sale everyday at the supermarket and the best kind of food to eat is the kind you grow and care for yourself. The best kind of meal is the one you share with others. The best kind of gift is the one where your example has been understood and passed on. I reckon the reason we have forgotten all of this is because we are BOTH burdened and privileged by modern progress that places the human as the center.

Con Fusing Nations.

OH! And I'll betcha the half of you, A Merry “I Can” People, don't know how to slaughter a chicken but I'll double bet ya love to eat 'em. Ah, I reckon we can order a spicy chicken filet while we're on it, huh? Vile and Vicious Vegans are not Void! Do you know how to keep vegetables healthy without nuking them? I mean, there are Microwaveable Monsanto babies being born everyday! Now, I really begin to wonder. Can you track a deer for days? Damn you, sitting in a deer stand watching the feeder! Hmmm....Can you talk to clouds? Ha! You're all a funny lot. No Joke!

Say it ain't so!
Please just... say...it...ain't...so.

A wise man once said:
“Whatever befalls the beast, befalls the children of the Earth.”

An Ordinary Jane says to me:
“Dude, has anyone ever told you that you are a redundant ranter of rollicking and robust rhetoric done so repetitively?”

Umm...
Umm...
I have to ponder on why I keep it up when no one seems to...

{sigh}

A dying species.
Us humans.

The Humans who will do nothing about Life because they are utterly engrossed with the contagiously selfish artificial that so inconveniently helps them forget the fact that the very foundation of prosperity is built through communal sustenance. A house divided is a house no more.

Please note: The Selfish will sell fish for false profit to the false prophet while the man who shares his catch with his enemy is forever a wealthy man. Aye, Aye, a story is a story and it is up to you to take from it what you will.

Love,
Cancer

You're Political and I'm Radical?

2011-08-08T04:18:00.000-07:00

So here we are, back on the saddle in Alpine fixin' to go down South and you know, if you're a Texan, 800 miles is just a fart lost in the wind. You see, we got enough room for all those hooey politicians an' lobbyists an' their egos an' money an' the Lord knows what more...Californians will try to choke you on that and Alaskans don't give a rat's ass cause they fly...We're driving the Machine! Good Ol' Gas'O'lean.

But...
But...
But...

Nevermind Ricky Perry
We be raisin' hell
lookin' pretty scary.
Nevermind conservative.
Prayer In Houston?
A Den of Thieves, I say.
Shhhhh!

Yes, as we have it, Austin is IN and a mighty fine place to visit and discover each time you go. Always something NEW! You got a little something of everything and that's a D right there. Deafinitely, I'd say.

An' no, no, no, we ain't talking about no grades an' no spellin'.

We're talking about D for Diversity and you got the Capitol of Texas sittin' right there. Left there and a little centered as well. Which wing is it, heck I couldn't tell you if I tried because I can't remember the case... HOWEVER, if you're flying with a birdseye view...soaring on high lookin' down below,...

then yep,..

Austin is right smack dab in the middle of the whole dang state, jes don't tell Brady I said that. You'd bout to break that heart of hers. Texasism that is. But, you know really, I don't think it really matters. Most of us from around here live deep in the heart of Texas regardless of where we are from instate or out.

ahhh, it's jes' the same gol'dern Texas twang I reckon, eh?
The lil' jigwerm...
a lure.

The Lone Star State.

It's much richer and coarser than that Over-On-Yonder Debilitated Arizony B.S. I don't like your immigration laws and your golf courses and your dams and your smog and your developments and your LIES! You're not worthy of living in a Desert! You could make a grown man cry like a baby for all your blind arrogance and selfish greed.

Pssst....
Favorite D is Desert.

Yet...
Yet...
Yet...

Now where was I?
Riot,..Riot.
Okey-Doke.
Here we go...

A little Turd begins: Terlingua Tale : Ghetto T and Testimony : (NC-17)

"Hey Fool?"

Yea?

"Man,...You ain't neva' paid no taxes and you ain't neva' done no shit bro! You ain't neva' even done no votin' fool! What the phuck man! Always talkin' about how the government is fulla shit and pullin' shit. Man, I got tuh tell you, son...You is a dam fool! Born Fool, bro. Bone Full. All Knuckleheaded and Meatheaded and all dat shizznit mixed up. Blocked up and Clocked up. Dat's what I sayin' an' you gots tuh stop talkin' shite about them, bro...cause they be watchin' and listnin' and watchin' an' uh all dhat shit you're doing online an' everywhere you go bro,..I'ma tellya sumfin fool,...you gots to quit that shit and if you don't do somethin' bout it,...I'm about it,...I'ma do some intervention and kick yo' mule headed ass cause man,...you cool man,..you cool...come on man..."

Hey T?

"Yo!"

You done with your Testimony?

"Testimony? Man I ain't been to no church in a whooooo long time bro an' if you think I's preachin' tuh yo jackass man,..you got tuh chill out cuz im jus' sayin' ya know,...but to come to think of it,..sum dem girls in the choir was hot...yo!"

Hey T,...What's it going to be? You're going to invite the devil into your church that you don't even go to just because you wanna MILK some MILFS in the choir? Not COOl man...

I mean, really,..Do NOT talk to me about TAXES when I'm talking about TEXAS, Aight? Got it man? Besides,...didn't I spend 300 dollars of SSI on your "months supply" which lasted a mere 4 days? Hmmm??? And whats more? It's not MY money,..it's Y'alls money so why are you getting mad at me when I got your back for 300 dollars of FOOD and GAS,... and look at you all FAT AND LAZY! HUH! Who mows your yard, Fool? HUH? Washes the Dishes? Sweeps The FLOOR? Takes out the TRASH??? Who? ME! It's me FOOL! And I don't even LIVE here! I ain't no itch with a B, alright?"

"it Cool...
it Cool...
it real Cool..."

Now, Now, Now.
Where were we when we went with Windy?
Right.......A FART lost in the WIND.

*twiddle thumbs and bites lips with a Duh Duh Duh*

Hey Who? Who?....You know why farts smell?

"Um, Why do they smell?"

So a Deaf person can hear it.

Har Har Har....

LAME...I know,...but hey what can WE say, it's one of those things everyday people tell me and they tell me that stuff because it is all relative to the fact that WE ARE Deaf. I'm used to it and it is all good cause WE pretty much got 'em all figured out. The Left and the Right.

You wanna know what WE LIKE?
WE LOVE the Center.

The Core of Community is Communication Comprehended Completely.

Now, Now, Now.

If we're talking about grades,...we must be getting close and cautiously credible and creatively crazy and culturally conscious as we confide with the caucus that we are collectively collaborating the conquest of a "conspiracy" that will corrupt them and their corporate colleagues.

Bubba, Better Be a BADASS Because Bullshit Becomes Bunk Before Baboony Bullies Bleed.

"Are you serious? BaBOONY???"

BUCK BAT BIT!
Speech Therapy.

Come on now,...surely we got a winner...Dontcha wanna SEE the Clown's nose flash. I mean really folks,..It's not rocket science...It's Bullshit that they deny kids the 'noblest gift'!

The Bee.
The Ball.
The Bay.
The Bow.
The Boy.

Ahhh,..yep,...the boy? The LOST one?
Man,...that's some sad shit.

Whoa,...You're making B's Bro!

Yeah Yeah
I know, Buh-Row!
Perot???

Man,...WTHey!
We got an A:

Audism Addressed Around And About Austin!
Thanks to DYUS...A.

"Man,..can I tell ya something?"

Sure.

"You're an Asshole!"

Yep...
That is a Truth,...
I AM Political and Hypocritical,...
and all the while
FREE to BE
ME!

If you really want to bitch at me about SSI and Jobs: Taxation without Representation and all of that jazz out of the old ball game. If you don't think that is what it is then WHY, with all the technology today, does a soldier have to be able to hear when training could simply be focused of the logistics of where and when upon command given through a simple cursor, resulting in a catastrophic yet strategic release of weapons that WILL result in killing you and your own?

I mean seriously, eugenics is already being played with on the DEAF gene in ways that have never been played with before and I refuse to settle for less, as a Deaf American, a fellow human being, you have love denied us the right to BE. A Free DNA test, NO Thanks! I AM:

Innovative.
Inspirational.
Informative.
Involved.
Included.
Independent.

I know you might convince them, the masses, that everything is good and just yet as I speak here now, I could actually give you some black and white and throw past the red tape because I have some that is blue and upon you.

The Eyes of the Skies
Of Course.

*ahem*

I am just as Able Bodied and as Capable, and as Dedicated about the Education of our Freedoms and what It Gives us Humans INstead of Jokes, Kills, Lies, Manipulation, Negligence, ORALISM, POLITICS, Quips, and Relentless Shit That U Vehement Xian Yo-Yo's Zymbolism

"Sym bol ism"

Dude,..I, uh, just, uh, want to say it one last time:
I'm Deaf and You're WRONG about it because it is my right to communicate in the language to serves me best and for that, I love American Sign Language!

I mean...this is no joke here, this IS personal:

American Sign Language is should be a National Treasure recognized for it's ability to create positive and !

Our Deaf Youth do not deserve to be deprived from the LIBERTY that ASL and the Deaf Community allow Families of Deaf Children to thrive healthily and heartily. A lot's of heartstrings mindbeams get tugged and shake when you're left out and feel like an outsider in your own circle. We should never let Our future fade away to the darkness of discomfort and inconvenience simply because we separate them from the most fundamental necessity, a visual means that affords them the luxury of a sound language development. TIC

Isn't that something,...sure give the hearing child a head start using sign language but nay should you have a deaf child,...
Sorry, y'all...

I cannot stress enough how important this is to our future and what jobs we DO have now. Please think about it all before you try to be neutral about something you ALREADY know.

So there ya have it!
Love, Peace, and all the real stuff out there,

-DeafJeff

p.s.

I voted for Koko because she was smarter than all those silly MEN they gave us. SO...Let's remember OUR HIStory...social justice has never been achieved by those who play nice and kind every time.

Harsh words are needed for deceptive intentions.

To release this living force for the greater good, go out there,..create ART, Write Stories, Make Films, Sign Poems, Dance, and Play all in the name of Your Truth.

Deaf YOUTH!

Deaf Good INc. via DYUSA-Austin

2011-07-30T10:53:00.001-07:00

Ha ha Ha ha Ha ha Ha ha Ha!...

Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good...
Deaf Good......

Pity's stacking up on A.G.Bell's back.
Gotta let it show 'cause they don't know Jack
So as we stand on Our feet, a fine place to be
We won't give up the bounty, 'cause We're truly Free
We've got a whole new vision, just forget about fear.
Throw out folly and sound that we hardly hear.
And all We wanna see is the message reap...
Our dreams, they know this, because We don't get sleep, no..

Handwaves, Handwaves over land.
Turn forever, Hand in Hand
Take it all there, steer their Ride
They are sinking, losing ground.
Deaf forever Deaf is Free
C'mon forever You and Me
Handwaves, Handwaves across land
Is Everybody IN?

Yep...Yep...Yep...
Deaf Good INc. can be had as we act upon:

INvitation...
INteraction..
INclusion...
INvolvement...
INspiration...

Yep! Yep! Yep!

Handwaves, Handwaves over land.
Turn forever, Hand in Hand
Take it all there, steer their Ride
They are sinking, losing ground.
Deaf forever Deaf is Free
C'mon forever You and Me
Handwaves, Handwaves across land
Is Everybody IN?

Get on your Feet...
Gotta beat the heat!
Watch us get together...
Gonna make it real!
We are Birds of Feather...
Sharing how we feel!

DEAF GOOD...

Whoooey...
DYUSA-AustIN!
Yeeehaw...
DYUSA-AustIN!
Oooh Yea!...
DYUSA-AustIN!

CommUnIty!
I'm INspired,...
...and of course, I am IN!
So what about U?

CommUnIty.
EveryONE is INvited!

[INfluenced by GORILLAZ]
Ha! ha! Ha! ha! Ha! ha! Ha! ha! Ha!

Volume Control

2011-07-27T14:54:00.000-07:00

You know, I'm sitting there at this restaurant with my hearing family and we're sitting around a rectangle of a table. My family doesn't know sign language and I can't equally decipher what each person's lips are flapping with so in situations like these, I just go into a zone. My own thoughts consume me...

Observe the place.
Take note of the lighting.
The mood of it.
The menu.

I check out the waitress...hmm...not bad!
She's cute. I wink at her. Hello Pretty!

Me folks around the table are chattering and paying little attention to what they will order. Do they even know what they want?

Jabber.
Natter.
Yadda-yadda.

I summon our beautiful waitress over to my seat and instead of verbally ordering my dinner, I point out what I want and use a little gesturing to emphasize that I'll have it cooked Medium Rare.

Soft and a little red.

I also point out that I'd like a pint of Dos Equis with lime. She gets it and smiles with appreciation that I've made up my mind as to what I will be eating. This little appreciation goes unnoticed by the others at our table but I motion to her to go ahead and poke at my old man. He usually has an immediate idea as to what he wants to eat.

Everyone slowly takes their time to make their orders complete. The waitress continues to grab glimpses of me while I'm just sitting there observing the way people in my family make their orders.

"No Garnish"
"I want this but without that"
"Can you put the mushrooms on the side?"

Picky and time consuming they are!

So there I am checking out the floor, the ceiling, the other customers, and yawning all the while. You see, I've always hated this kind of crap because it is all stupid and lame. I'd rather be at MY house cooking MY steak with MY beer in MY hand. I never did like sitting around asking people what they're talking about every god damned 5 minutes.

People are too absorbed in the mix of it all. Talkative and inattentive at the same time. They've seen me deal with this crap for 32 years and they still want to include me at such gatherings and functions because I'm a part of the family. One would think inclusion goes beyond the invitation itself. Nah, I'm a statue that can twiddle thumbs. Bored out of my mind with the monotony of this familial bullshit.

Yes, I love them.
Yet, I'm damn tired.
Tired of the same old shit.
Different Day.

I NO LIKE!

While we wait, I approach my father with a question:

"Did you order a beer, if so what kind?"

He asks me to repeat what I said and I did.

This time he is interrupted by a question from my aunt and so I wait patiently for them to wrap that interference up. I wait. I wait some more. I wait a good while and they're still talking. Fed up with the waiting, I again ask my old man, "Didja order a beer? What'd ya get?"

He responds requesting that I speak up louder.

I speak louder.

He again asks me to speaker even louder.

I do it a notch louder and with an expression of frustration and distraction, Dad gestures with his hand to speak up LOUDER!

I, having had my patience stretched and my boredom served, rise from my chair and YELL loudly: "Look Dad, all I wanted to know was what you are ordering to drink. BIG FUCKING DEAL, right?!"

After this burst of booming agony, I had all eyes in that building looking at me in disbelief. I look at them with a face of anger and grimace.

"What the hell are you all looking at? EAT, DRINK, AND BE MERRY, MOTHAFUCKAS!"

Dad grabs me by the arm and tells me to sit down because I've spoken TOO LOUD.

Argh!...you just can't win with these selfish and arrogant bastards.

The waitress immediately brings me my beer and says that it's on the house.
NICE!

32 years, yo!
I'm tired.

Adios!

2011-07-16T15:49:00.000-07:00

OOOH A Conspiracy Theory:

When the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing saw that a website like DeafRead could be used as a tool for a movement. They worried. When they saw what happened to Jane K. Fernandes. They fretted. When they saw the number of hits coming in on a daily basis. They began to sweat.

Something must be done...

So what did they do? They let some money do some talking and had some shares acquired with the expectation that this would never happen again. Money and contracts actually shut people up and they're known as sell outs.

Hey YOU! I know you!
What's up?

Yet, I ain't gonna argue with the likes of them because it is really useless. They're in the business for the money and they don't care too much about social justice or equality. Deafness sells and Deaf doesn't. Deafness garners sponsors and includes more people than the culturally Deaf. Audism practiced under the guise of diversity. Ha!

Now I'll put it short and sweet:

Oh, the old gray mare, she ain't what she used to be,
Ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be.

Whoooo-ey!

If you look at 'em now. You'll see that they're just trudging through molasses and relying on a few inept writers in order to keep above the surface. Writers who tell of opinions and what-have-ye. Writers who argue that the majority of Deaf people cannot read. Writers who claim that Deaf people are inconsiderate of the hearing majority. Writers who are simply status quo joes.

You see, I, too, am a writer and I do it because I love it. The Deaf related stuff I usually post here, yet the real good stuff,...that is for posthumous publication. What I share with you here is only my testimony and observations as a Deaf man and yes, I know who and what I am. I'm DeafJeff and mighty proud of it. I am who I am because I was raised the way I was. I've seen quite a bit, I know how they work, and how they manipulate things. So deny all you want,...there IS a corporate agenda that uses children and parents as pawns.

Hello.
I there before.
Saw finish.
Know Know.
Me dumb not.

As for DeafRead, Two Main Points:

User friendly? Hell No.
Recognize audism? Pffft.

What is more,..they've yet to remove my blog. Yep, I sent the "bossman" an email requesting that my blog be removed. That was Thursday, July 14th. *ahem*

Why am I leaving DeafRead?
Because it is for the birds.

So,...with this post,...I bid thee farewell DeafRead, yet I'll still continue to blog and vlog, just not through the means of patronizing your place.

Hasta.
I'm out.

Can you hear me now?

2011-07-11T11:51:00.000-07:00

First we kindly asked you to leave.
You refused.

Then we TOLD you to leave.
You, again, refused.

You were obnoxiously rude and profane.
A fucking drunk!

You're screaming and waking everyone up and calling them "Motherfuckers!" Woman, it is three in the morning and we're trying to get some sleep. Yea,...SLEEP not drunk. Capisce!

BUT oh no no no,...you were looking for a fight. You brought out the claws. You were aiming for trouble and oh no no no....we weren't having any of it. We asked. We told ya. You didn't care!

That's where YOU fucked up. That's where you slipped and I grabbed ya and moved you into the hall. You wanted to throw a punch. You wanted the shit to go down. You kept at it so then I grabbed you once more and I threw your sorry ass outside. Slammed the door and I locked ya out!

Now that is taking out the trash, yo.

You drive by 2 days later and use the only sign language you know. "Fuck You!" and I'm like awright....I done seen it. You come back by and I'm like "Hey! What the fuck is that shit all about and you're like,....yadda yadda yadda bitch bitch bitch la la la la la THEN you say:

"Get the fuck out of my way you deaf motherfucker Huh? Huh! Can you hear me now? Huh? What? That's right! I thought so!"

So you pull that card out and I'm like uh-huh....right.....you're calling me deaf when woman,...

You can hear and yet, you don't listen for shit.

Now tell me who is deaf?
Eh? Huh? What?

Be awright.

Repetitions

2011-07-02T16:58:00.000-07:00

A question for you, a question for me, a question for us all to see…
For us all to see…see…see…

Ah, so you don’t like the term audism and you don’t wish to see yourself associated with this "thing" called Deafhood?

Well, then I reckon that should go on to tell me that you’ve pretty much settled for yourself what is most suiting for you and where you belong, thus there is no need to meddle with discussions relating to the above mentioned terms, aye?

If that be the case, then you might not find what I have to say to be the least bit interesting, however, you are more than welcome to place your eyes on this piece and stick your nose in the stink of it all. I mean, after all, if we don’t clean it up now, who will? What of the stench? Oh the trouble!

So what is it going to be, eh?
Propaganda!

Ah, I guess if you’ve read this far, then I can surely say we best carry on and not tarry, jes? Besides, you’re obviously curious enough to know where I’m going to take this and I best do my duty of entertaining you to the fullest so that you may see.

So that they may see…see…see…

Audism: the shit that happens when you’re not treated like an equal in a hearing world and it happens to every fool who has less than perfect hearing. You see, whether aided or implanted, oral or mute, that audist shit happens, so suck it up and deal with it because it IS there.

Okay,… if you’re one to say that shit doesn’t happen to you, well then I guess I could say they (the audist pigs, parents’ shame, et al) did a good job programming your ass to slap on a smile and nod every time you don’t understand shit when you’ve already asked them twice to repeat. Either that or you just don’t give a fuck what they say while you wear your best poker face.

Alas!
You are a success!

You see, asking people to continuously repeat themselves multiple times is considered “effective communication” with no emotional or psychological side effects whatsoever. It beats being a mute eh?

HA! That’s what they think.

Deafhood: the journey one takes from being ashamed to being proud of their being deaf. If you don’t recognize the word, we know where you stand and we will wait for YOU when you’re ready. Nothing more need be said. Now, if you recognize the word but keep arguing with yourself about it, break the mirror and buy another mask, or better yet, pull the trigger. That’d be one less puppet on the stage. Otherwise, stand tall!

*commercial break*

The following commercial was made possible by A Great Big Association of the Deaf (AGBAD) and readers like you:

“HEY!
Support your local deaf community: buy firecrackers, subwoofers, foghorns, jet engines, or anything that can promote severe to profound hearing loss and max it out. Surely you can help our community grow, one ear at a time, baby!”

*drum roll*

Ladies and Gentlemen!
In the stink of it all…it is:

auditorization: a process enforced upon deaf children to make them act or think like hearing people. This alone teaches the child, from the beginning, that in the minds of hearing people, they should strive to develop an identity other than their own because being deaf is bad, no good, evil, and unacceptable. This process also creates fine bullshitters and naysayers who blindly support the corporate agendas that are killing cultures across the globe, namely their own. Humans. Ha ha ha!

Aye, let us break it all down so that you can truly see.
So that they may truly see…see…see…

Methods of Auditorization:
1. Segregation and isolation from signed languages and users of them.
2. Forced to focus on speech and hearing rather than solid language acquisition.
3. Curriculum reflects that of the dominant hearing culture.
4. Textbooks and testing reflect that of the dominant hearing culture.
5. Denial of the pupil’s natural learning abilities (visual and manual).
6. Teachers are role models for the hearing culture.

And what of the home schooled?
Hey there, they’re the home fooled.

Truer learning happens out of nests and out from under wings.
Where they can, for themselves, finally see.
Finally see,…see…see…

Now, now now, I want you to look at the above list with an open mind and heart. I want you to look beyond your own account of being deaf and consider the whole, if you will. Many of us come from that 90% who were born into hearing families and were mainstreamed or onestreamed or fuckstreamed or what have ye, with no notion of a proud deaf culture. We were more familiar with the terms hearing impaired and hard of hearing than we were of the term deaf and if there were any one word we did know, it would be the word, deafness.

“Pardon the interruption, but may I please have your attention. The above word deafness is misspelled and we would like to apologize for the inconvenience it may have caused. We leave you with the correct spelling, which is: M-O-N-E-Y. That is correct: deafness is spelled: M-O-N-E-Y. Again, we apologize for the inconvenience and we thank you for your patience. (blip)”

We knew these words from the doctors, specialists, parents, and educators who love and believe that their country is the best in the world, that we have the best medicine, the best technology, the best beliefs, and the best of the best in all things.

God Bless America!

We stood in class every morning saying the pledge of allegiance to the flag of the United States of America wearing some hearing aid, auditory trainer, phonic ear, or implant that made some artificial sounds, which were to many of us, useless. We stood like tireless soldiers for hearing ideals and don’t you forget, we were never good enough to serve in the armed forces like Grandpappy did, but hey, they wouldn’t tell you that, right? We were too busy straining our minds in keeping up with the right lip movements at the right time, the right sound and the right tone. And justice for all.

Sir Yes Sir!
-salutes-

The whole time they’re trying to teach us something using speech and hearing, they fail to notice that it is primarily our observations that clue us in on what is the right and wrong thing to do, what earns rewards and what does not. Pretty soon we master the methods used and eventually we find ourselves being a “model” child, not for other deaf children, but for PARENTS of deaf children.

*commercial break*

-On Deaf People-
God to Man: I created them that way.
Man to God: Thanks for the charity.

“Hey PuppetBoy!

You better talk and sing sweetly so I can sell more puppets that look like you. Only you, my precious PuppetBoy, are blessed with such abilities, while the rest are merely pieces of wood I need to get rid of.

Go on and get about talking the way you do. I need my M-O-N-E-Y or else you’re going to burn in yonder fire!”

*hat tip*

Because our wasp assed government has not officially recognized the cultural and linguistic values of our country’s signing deaf community, our politicians end up supporting the auditorization of deaf children because it garners them more support from lobbyists and corporate interests (money) that help them stay in office and such, in return, helps corporations stay in business. This whole situation has long since made it difficult, if not impossible, to educate all deaf children successfully and it has ultimately divided all of us who share the experience of having less than perfect hearing.

That is their agenda:
Make us weak.
Make them strong.

Make whom strong?
Those with the Lie Abilities.

To me, the saddest thing about it is not that we are discriminated upon by the ignorance of hearing people but such ignorance is supported by those who are ashamed to be deaf, hard of hearing, or users of American Sign Language.

*commercial break*

-A Good Business Sketch-

Business: The day when every deaf child receives an implant:
(not real figures, numbnuts!)

1 in 1000 babies born are born deaf every day.
3000 babies born every day = 3 deaf babies a day.
3 deaf babies a day multiplied by 30,000 dollar implants = 90,000 dollars projected
90,000 dollars projected a day means a projected 27,400,000 dollars annually.

If every child had 2 implants at 30,000 each the projected annual would be: 54,800,000

Good for the USA!

You see, as technology continues to improve, kids will eventually have to return to the operating room to get “maintenance and repair”. Replace older and outdated technology with a newer and more expensive one. They cannot live without the synthetic shit you have given them. You’ve got ‘em hookt on fonics.

C.I. Kenny says:
“Mah mommer caint pays fer a newtwon cuss she done spent her ever las penner on thuh one I gots in mah heyad.”

Don’t worry you sonny, we got payment plans to help you get double drilled! We got the connections to help with hearing directions.

C.I. Kenny says:
“imma sine me upon a pizza paper says I get a double dwillin in mah heyad. Dey’s gots thuh cuh cuh cuh nekssssss shuns tuh healp me hur butter.”
.

*microphone feedback*

If you made it all the way down here and have enjoyed it, thank you for reading. If you read it and feel sour or do not find this appealing to your taste, I apologize. I only want to express my sentiments, just that and only that.

Until the next one,
D.B. Shitehead

A Case Scenario

2011-06-30T04:56:00.000-07:00

Ben Fucht and his wife, Reeley, gave birth to a healthy baby girl, Shirley, on May 31, 1992. They were told by doctors that their daughter was born Deaf but that fact alone did not convince them, the parents, that something was seriously wrong with their child. Both Ben and Reeley were perfectly happy that their daughter was a healthy and joyful baby girl. Upon learning more about deafness, they decided to take the oral only route because, as the doctors stressed, it would provide a broader range of opportunities as opposed to the signing route. Through the first several months, the doctors and specialists, continued to direct Ben and Reeley to various materials distributed by the umbrella association known as the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf. Below is a brief explanation or time line of what happened to this family.

Case Scenario:

Daughter is discovered to be Deaf.
AGB immediately follows up with Mom and Dad.
Parents choose oral only route but decide against a cochlear implant.
Become members of the AGB association for the Deaf and hard of hearing.
Daughter gets fitted with hearing aids.
Daughter is 6 years old with limited vocabulary.
AGB suggest implantation since aids have provided little success.
Parents again decide against it.
Daughter continues speech and auditory training.
Daughter is 9 years old with a 5 year old's thinking.
Temper tantrums, screams and cries, frustration leads to rejecting her aids.
Parents decide to abandon oral only route and pursue learning American Sign Language.
AGB tries to convince parents that their daughter is a perfect candidate for a C.I.
Parents remain true to their desires and avoid the operating room.
American Sign Language becomes daughter's preferred language for instruction.
AGB abandons parents.

Hmmm...

By the age of ten years old, Shirley lacks a solid vocabulary, social skills, and shows signs of emotional and psychological stress in her behavior.

AGB's position on Mom and Dad's decision:

"If you do not do this (receive a CI), you are neglecting your child and denying them the opportunity to be a fully functional member of society. You will be restricting them to the Deaf world and not the world at large."

Yes folks, you read that right. Mom and Dad ended up being tripped up with guilt and as a result, stayed the course of the oral only route even when they had witnessed the little progress made with their daughter.

So what have we?

A young girl at ten years of age, who has been denied the opportunity to process information and to accumulate knowledge in the same timely manner as her age-mates.

You see, you have parents who have to start all over again, basically from scratch. They have to learn another approach as well as another language and this depresses them to the point that their motivation is completely shot. As a result they decided to send their daughter to the state school for the Deaf where she can acquire her new language, American Sign Language.

8 Years later, on May 28th 2010, Shirley graduates high school with honors and was voted by her class as the one most likely to succeed. She developed her trademark way of signing ASL and was considered by everyone to be one of the funniest story tellers. Today she is currently enrolled at Gallaudet University and is pursuing a BA in History. She hopes to one day inspire others to create history.

When asking her parents what they would have done differently, they replied:

"Learn sign from the beginning whether they (the child) have residual hearing or use an implant. This will ease the tensions between differences within familial issues and makes communication easier."

Fact: Parents who sign have more interaction with their Deaf adult children than those who do not.

Question: Who promotes this reality?

The JOKE is on you.

2011-06-27T09:28:00.000-07:00

Ha! HA! Ha! HA!

I can spit on your ASL.
I can ignore your values.
I can call you an imbecile.
I can praise my abilities over your inabilities.

I can simply discriminate your ass because you can't hear and I can. You can't speak and I can. You don't wear an aide and I do. You don't have a CI and I do. I can understand hearing people and you can't. We're with the righteous and the proper. You're with stupid. Those monkey miming and ape gesturing people are simply pathetic. And that is okay. You know why?

DeafRead says it is okay to do so because they do not recognize the Deaf Community and the its values. It is okay to discriminate others because they don't speak or hear. It's okay to hold prejudices towards us and bunch us heathens in the same pen because we don't subscribe to the idea that speaking and hearing is necessary and that ASL is an obstruction to the goal of making every Deaf child fully functional by hearing standards.

Note: Hearing Standards

Yep,..it is all the rage,...because Deaf people really have no standards and values. Besides,...ASL isn't even a language. There is no such thing as a Deaf Heritage. What the hell are they thinking?

Fuck Deaf people and their cultural and linguistic values. This is a hearing world and we have the right to impose our values over these thoughtless imbeciles who believe they are so special.

C'mon,..let's talk about how much fun it is to be better than them and lets imagine how depressing and drastic our lives would be if we couldn't speak or hear and let us thank God we can belittle those who don't understand what the world wants for us.

Thank You DeafRead for allowing us to properly piss on the Deaf Community. The fact that you refuse to acknowledge a form of discrimination in which those who speak and hear can insult those who don't, you make it so easy for others to learn how to do the same.

Many Thanks!
Crazy Eight.

Hey AGBell, I want to go to college too!

2011-06-25T09:05:00.000-07:00

"Mom!...Dad!...

I found a scholarship on the internet that will help us put me through college and it's sponsored by the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing."

Now, imagine the excitement Crystal and her parents felt when they discovered a specific scholarship that will help pay for college tuition and expenses for someone who is Deaf or hard of hearing. You see, the Clear family was barely getting by with Dad working as a janitor at the church across the street and Mom as a cashier at the local dollar store. Crystal had been worried since her junior year about finding a means to support herself through college. As an adept and studious pupil, she was determined to receive an education beyond high school. What a surprise it must have been for her to come across a scholarship that supports the Deaf and hard of hearing!

YET...

As they read the first criterion for eligibility to receive the scholarship, their excitement was immediately replaced with disappointment.

[Spoken communication must be the applicant's primary mode of communication.]

Crystal responded with grave concern, "But I am Deaf? Why is it so important that I must speak? I thought the AGBell Association was supportive of the Deaf and hard hearing."

She was very upset to find that such a scholarship was solely for those eligible, those who could speak and she found it rather perplexing to see them discriminate her on the basis that she was a signing Deaf person.

Hmmm...
Well I'll be....

I reckon it is CRYSTAL clear that the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and hard of hearing does not aim to support the signing Deaf population in pursuing a post secondary education.

But didn't they claim to include and support ASL among their membership?
Didn't they???

Please help me understand their reasons for only supporting Deaf and hard of hearing individuals who speak rather than sign?

Didn't they say they support the signing Deaf?
Didn't they???

Please show me why they do not want to support those who sign when they declare that those who don't are also members of the Deaf Community.

C'mon,..help a guy out, will ya?

Bonus Questions:

If "AG Bell does not believe that ASL should be prohibited or restricted as a choice, nor does AG Bell advocate against learning ASL as part of a child’s overall development if that is what the child’s parents desire", why are they discriminating parents of Deaf children who opted to raise their kids with ASL as their primary language?

AND

Would Gallaudet be considered a "mainstream" university?

URLS:
http://nc.agbell.org/NetCommunity/Page.aspx?pid=493
http://nc.agbell.org/NetCommunity/Page.aspx?pid=542

Now excuse me while I go out to get some fresh air. Hypocrisy stinks!

A Question for MKM

2011-06-23T14:04:00.000-07:00

If you don't like what the Deaf community has to say about the choices you make/made for your Deaf child, you can easily walk away and maintain a "normal" life for you and your child. I mean, heck, you don't have to keep posting your blogs on Deaf centric websites whose target audience is the Deaf community itself.

But, no, you choose to remain and in that you have chosen to be a target before a passionate community which is adamant about their cultural and linguistic identity. On this, I need not say more. Besides, isn't it your aim to immerse your child into a world where all options are made available and all opportunities can be had?

You can tout that you do provide all options and all opportunities for your child while you unconsciously hope that you may phase out the sign language and reach your ulterior aim to produce a successful and functional child who can communicate primarily through speaking and hearing.

My mama was afraid I'd forget to speak and lipread... uh-huh!

You say this is ridiculous and that is understandable on our part because...
...you simply don't understand.

Like I said,.. it is understandable...tsk...

You can praise all the modalities and technologies that are made available while overlooking the fact that such things are oppressive to the choices others have made. Choices that are simple and noninvasive on the child's being.

All of this brings me to the question:

Why do you continue to post on Deaf centric sites if you want your child to be a part of the "greater" hearing world and not the Deaf community?

I mean, sure, you want to share with others your experience and your familial journey in what you might call "deafness". The pathological term. I'm not saying you can't, just don't do it before the people who are perfectly happy with being a Deaf person rather than a hard of hearing, hearing impaired, or cochlear implanted individual.

If you want us to respect your choices, please respect ours. If you can't do that, then let me say this once and for all...get the fuck outta here and be sure to take your arrogant ignorance and propaganda with you.

Deaf people will continue to celebrate their heritage for as long hearing people continue to become deaf.

HA!

p.s. One could argue that DeafRead is not Deaf centric,...I know what it is but hey,..you tell me what you think...*wink*

Assholes Anonymous

2011-06-21T05:29:00.000-07:00

I must be doing something right when a barrage of anonymous commentators decide to attack me and my blogposts that relate to Deaf children and their education. I mean, if I'm getting threats and statements that attempt hurt me, scare me, and belittle me, hell, I AM doing something right!

You see, when I first had my blog go through the DeafRead aggregate, I would allow anonymous comments to be posted because I respected people and their right to retain privacy while participating in Deaf related discussions. Alas, after years of studying the patterns of various IP addresses, I have come to know who these people are and how or why they react to the particular things I have expressed on MY blog.

Damn, I'm good!
Express I can.
Express I will.

With this, it is safe to say that you are never anonymous when you show up here on my blog. I know who you are and I've got you tagged and bagged, yet if you want such comments to be posted, I suggest you find some courage and use your real names. If not,... it just goes to show that you can't play with the big dogs because you pee like a puppy. You can't be a real person. Just a puppet who makes futile attempts to mindfuck yours truly.

Sorry folks, you can't intimidate me because I've sided with the children and the Truth. It sure is nice to know that my doing such truth saying intimidates you. It should! Otherwise I wouldn't get such hateful remarks from these no-name cowards. You're the ones who are paddling upstream (south) on Denial and you know what they say about things going South....

Tsk...I wonder why you're intimidated?
*whistling and twiddling thumbs as I look at the heavens above*

You want us to "move on" when you're the ones chaining Deaf children to an ideology that has failed many of us. Don't believe it now? Wait til puberty kicks in and the Truth comes out. Yep,...watch the days to come when your denial is challenged by their Truth.

Again,..Just YOU wait...

I know,..I got a Mama and a Papa and it hurts them to read the things I say because it is the Truth and they know it. Just like you will...

Signed,
Asshole Anonymous ;)

P.S. Summertime!

Hey YOU! YES, YOU!

2011-05-23T21:50:00.000-07:00

No sir.
No ma'am.

You most certainly will not use my voice.
You definitely will not corrupt my gift.

Nope,...no-siree...naw....naw....naw....
I'm not gonna let you manipulate the situation.

Uh-uh,...like hell you will...

I will not be bullied by you and your hearing world into thinking that I can be a tool for your benefit, for the sake of making communication easier for you and harder for me, for the benefit of your company and product that doesn't reveal honest results. I will not allow you to exploit me for the sake of that market and ideology.

Liah! Liah!
Pants on fiah!

I will not be proud and pretend that I understand you. I will not be led to believe that I am something that I am not. I will not lead others, as you'd have me, to believe that the quality of life is so much better when you can speak and hear. I refuse to believe that one who hears and speaks has a much better chance at opportunities than one who does neither.

It's in your head, Fool!...
It's in your head!
That's capital F, FOOL!
...in yer heyuhd...

I will not be your middle man for the one who won't sign and the one who doesn't speak. Hell NO I say! I ain't gonna letcha run the show because there is just so little that you know. Besides, it is not your show and neither is it mine.

...And I stepped outside and I opened up my arms and said...
I am alive...yeeeeeeeeehaw!!!

I'm a Deaf man who can speak and I speak pretty damn good for a fucker who can't hear a damn thing. Yeah,...I'm gonna brag about it but I'm gonna do it for a good cause. You can call it crazy and messed up but that's alright because I really don't expect you would understand anyhow...

I can use my voice because it belongs to ME, not you dumbfucks. Got it? I can refuse to use my voice because I have that right. Pues si! Oh,...and you can learn to sign. I mean, heck, I learned to speak AND I learned to sign so I don't see how you CAN'T learn to sign, right?

BUT Oh right,..you don't have time or respect for diversity. Okay,..I gotcha, bro.
THUMBS UP! Tsk! (wink)

I'm telling you,...you can do whatever you want with what you got and what you chose, but I have to say this,..you sold out, yo!

Bragging still...

I learned really early because I lost it all and when you lose it all, only then do you start to see others who never had it, actually prove to you that your thinking has a hearing world bias to it that actually reeks of discrimination and derogatory thinking.

You gotta swaller yer pride.
Pull up your britches.
Be humbled dammit...

Now now now,..I'm gonna include two links to vlogs of mine that have no captions and no sign language in them because I CHOSE, like parents are entitled to do so for their Deaf children, to address a hearing audience. Pffffttt!

Choices! Choices! Choices!

Bet your hearing aid can't catch every word.
Oh? Blame it on the accent.
Aw-rite!

Yea,..I get to chose whatever I want and however I do it. It's all about me, baby! I know what I know... I said what I said,...uh huh,...ME!

The purpose of re-posting these vlogs is to give you idiots a good, solid, and prime example of what an audist is. Oh yes,..I've been considered one many a time but I've had great teachers who have provided me with other prime examples and I've walked a good distance myself. Not just through my own doings but in the doings of others and I hope these vlogs give you, the idiots, an idea of what it is YOU do, knowingly or not, that is ridiculously rude and oppressive.

You see,..the two vlogs deal with TV shows that brainwash folks like you.

In the vlogs I talk about ABC's portrayal of Deaf children and Deaf people. I'm talking about how Marlee Matlin is being used. I'm talking about audism and what it entails. I'm talking about a manager refusing to hire some one simply on the basis that they cannot hear. I'm talking about teaching the world how to effectively discriminate deaf people without getting into licit terms, on primetime. I'm talking about bloggers who write some of the stupidest stuff because they buy in to that propaganda and illusory bullshit. The sad fact about these here vlogs is that I'm talking about issues that INVOLVE Deaf people and yet I've closed the doors of discussion that could INCLUDE Deaf people themselves.

That right there, me pally, is bona fide audism right before yer eyes.

Yep,...I'm aware of what it is and I'm mighty sorry that you choose to deny it exists or refuse to even try to get it. Maybe one day when you lose it all, you might just hear the call.

Pretty Cwazee...yea,...

Like I said in the beginning, Deaf people have a bigger purpose in life than to be trained puppets. They're here to tell you what you can't hear. They're here to cut your strings and broaden your horizons. They're not here as subjects for science. There is more to it than you may ever know...

Aye aye aye...on a final note,..I can use my voice to fight the good fight, to scream the Truth, and to shut the shitheads like YOU, YES, YOU!,...up. I ain't worried,...I've plenty of hearing allies and truth-keepers to put you to shame. I ain't playing...

And if I choose to simply sign in your face,..that, too, you must deal with. Sorry, folks,...I didn't come out of the factory like they had hoped.

Other than that, I'm out.

Terlingua Tales: The Ghosts of Terlingua

2011-05-11T17:42:00.000-07:00

There they were just a rockin’ and rollickin’ along the long and dusty trail in a gnarly looking Ford Ranger. They had on their usual attire and the smell of booze was a buzzin’ in the air. These three amigos were in the mood to walk around the ghost town just to shoot the cool evening breeze with a hard day’s sweat. You see the rambling three were about as much of a mystery to the locals as La Llorona was to the Desert Southwest.

“Who are those guys over there?”
“Is he wearing a dog chain?”
“Why are they using sign language?”

The tourist gawk and stare at us while the locals whisper hooey amongst themselves. Of course, we pay them no mind and tend to ourselves. One is off to the get a pack of smokes. The second went to the jail to take a piss while the third sits on the porch taking mental pictures of the situation. The shine of the sun is slowly fading off the tips of the mighty Chisos Mountains while fiddles and strings tease the atmosphere with ear grabbing notes. Everyone watches the eastern sky, as the hues of blues appear to consume the sheds of reds. A sunset has come and gone. The night has come and is ready to play. So play she said and play they did.

One declares the need to assist the Crisis Center by initiating a real crisis. The second proclaims that there are cops and fascists pigs swarming all over this here porch. The third hops off the bench and flips off the closed circuit camera as he hollers a loud burst of “Whooo-ey!” They all laugh and chuckle at the stunned audience and together they gather beside the ice chest to plot the next sequence of Truth.

After each getting another cold one, they return to the bench on the porch and resume their rude awakenings for the dormant masses that walk about with hardly a clue as to what separates them from us. Of course, they knew it mattered little that the people were terrified of them and it would be awhile later that perhaps the people would suddenly get the idea and awaken the spirit within. This approach doesn’t always prove to be effective but it certainly riles up many. It stirs them up to a point that they actually write about it in their local papers and publications that are found far and away.

Yet, as you would have it, the ghost haired lady by the name of Rude Anne approaches the three and points to the one in the middle as she grimaces her face and questions the other two,

“Who does that dog belong to and why is it on the porch and why doesn’t it have a leash?”

The three wryly look at each other then slowly they turn towards the Ghost Haired Lady and as they bare their teeth, they start barking like rabid canines. One was chomping wildly at the air, another was growling as he frothed beer from his mouth, the third was mad dogging her with the evil eye. As all this commotion takes place, the crowd begins to disperse and immediately the porch had been swept clean of any lingering trash.

All that remains are three wild animals and power hungry bitch, who having stepped three steps back, reaches for her cell phone and announces that she’s calling the Sheriff.

One replied: “You call the Sheriff, I’ll burn your house down.”

The second says: “I reckon you ain’t from around here, huh?”

The third mutters: “I’m gonna get a shovel.”

The Ghost Haired Lady scrambles to get into the Trading Post and seek shelter from what looked like Hell to Come. The Three amigos then slowly sit back down on the bench to finish their beer and cigarette before loading back up into the truck and rolling on once again down that long and dusty trail. As they wrap up the night and discard the trash, they fly past the cemetery passing the Sheriff and with a hootin’ and a hollerin’, they yell in unison,

“I still wish you the very best, with a FUCK YOU AND FUCK HER TOO!”

And so it is told, beware, for the Ghosts of Terlingua are out and about.

Taking out the Deaf Trash!

2011-05-06T08:35:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd take out some bits of Deaf Trash while we're talking about trash. I figured it would be a good way to get things cleaned up and put away.

Trash #1: Sign Language is hazardous to your health and will get you killed by gangsters who think you're stacking. People who wear hoods and use sign language are risking their lives.

Disposal: Stupid people are hazardous to your health and will get you killed. Never believe what stupid people assume.

Trash #2: PSE is what most Deaf people use today to communicate. As a piece of trash, I can verify that only a few people actually use ASL. What's more, I do not need an education or any instruction relating to American Sign Language. I'm a born expert piece of trash and I know all about ASL and Deaf culture.

Disposal: As a piece of trash, your argument is trash. Trash is only capable of making assumptions and moot points. Besides, trash doesn't know how to show it's face. They're ashamed and insecure for they are trash and they don't want to be picked up and hauled off.

Trash #3: It is good to report on other pieces of trash because it helps us boost our self esteem. Nothing is sweeter than the taste of vindication because it helps us forget that we're actually pieces of trash. Trash reporting is addicting.

Disposal: Acknowledge all pieces of trash and dispose of it properly.

Trash #4: Choice words are a reflection of yourself.

Disposal: Trash is Trash.

Now speaking of messes, check out the information below and consider the 309 million people in the United States.

According to the Annenberg Foundation, the average American generates about 4.6 pounds of solid trash a day. This would mean that the average American generates about 1679 annual pounds of solid trash. In other words, a family of 5 generates an average 8395 annual pounds of trash.

Talk about a Trashy Nation.

There are lots of other forms of trash out there but with the numbers already here,..I wouldn't want to overwhelm you further.

"Your reality is not my reality because what you call a reality is actually YOUR fantasy."
-old wise man on the hill

Deaf Comedy Jam

2011-05-03T12:47:00.000-07:00

Roberta stated:

"When a hearing person approaches and talks to you, you smile and nod hoping she/he leaves you alone. I do that too."

Jocelyn:
"I do that alll the time...I fake a laugh too."

Mikki:
"I do the same thing unless I actually want to make a conversation, I would say get the paper or I walk off. *shrugs*"

Jose:
"Lmao!"

Nikita:
"I do it but not anymore.... Due to what happen..me and my friend went to a meeting..this hearing guy was talking to my friend, as she nod and nod and he pick up the chair..she start scream at him, he was like I ask you if I could have the chair and you say yea...NEVER WILL NOD AGAIN....."

Tia:
"Hahahahha @ Nikita.....and BELLE I caught on a looooong time ago....smh but it's cool LOL"

James:
"hahah I do that sometimes."

Lauren:
"Lol. I do the same thing too. Once I was embarrassed b/c one guy was talking to me & I just nodded my head. He left & came back with a hotdog! I realized oh gosh! He asked me if I wanted a hotdog!! Lmao!! "

Roberta:
"LOL at y'all. I fake laugh if a hearing person laughs. If s/he actually asks a question, I usually go, huh? [pointing to my ear], they mostly stop and leave. It always works for me. LoL!!"

Doris:
"I don't nod, I point to my ear and shake my head, they leave feeling oh so guilty. 'I'm so sorry I didn't know' ;)"

Roberta:
"There are some days that I don't feel like dealing with them, Doris. So that's why I smile and nod. Haha."

Doris:
"For me, smiling and nod gives them the chance to keep talking talking talking... Lol I should try that and see if somebody brings me a hotdog! "

AJ:
"Most ppl know that I can't hear....if I am with Amber and they are talking she usually is the one who responds and then I nudge her and ask her wtf those ppl want. If I am by myself I try to read their lips and if I can't undy them I go, "I...'m sorry I don't understand you. I can't hear." One time at the bank I was trying to get money out of my account by cashing a check and the teller was talking to me. I told her twice I couldn't hear and ended up having to go back outside to get my ID eventhough I had a check from my account signed. Amber came back in with me and explained to the teller I couldn't hear her. The teller told Amber she didn't know. I got mad and yelled at her in front of the whole bank, "I TOLD YOU TWO TIMES I COULDN'T HEAR!" boy was she glad to give me my money and shoo me out of the bank lmao!"

Roberta:
"And you end up paying for a hotdog, Doris! Haha!"

AJ:
"Depending on the kind of hotdog....those are YUMMY!"

Roberta:
"AJ, some hearing people don't understand that we can't hear and they continue talking. It's annoying!"

AJ:
"I know! I was at this place paying a bill one time and Amber was talking to the ppl that run the place...they know us cuz we go up there every month to make payments...and they were talking about how hard it must be for me to be deaf and having hearing ppl talk to me all the time. I told them "well it's not like I go around wearing a tag that says 'HI! I'M DEAF AND CAN'T UNDERSTAND A FRIGGING THING YOU SAY!" they died laughing so hard!"

Doris:
"Ohh!! I thought in that situation a guy offered to buy her a hotdog!
Yeah sometimes it doesn't work, especially in the club when males be trying to talk to you, you tell them "I can't hear" they assume u can't hear because of the music blas...ting so they come closer to your face and try to shout in your ear!"

Roberta:
"LoL!! Doris, he could have asked, do you want a hotdog? You nodded. He brought you and expected you to pay. Anything can happen. LoL!

Yes yes!!! It did happen to me many times. When the music stopped, I left a guy immediately right after dancing because I didn't want him to speak to me. Hahaha!!"

Tricia:
"My gosh, Bella!! you will be damn fool if u are laughing with him along....hahahaha"

Tumblin:
"Roberta, excuse me if you will...

You know what I think is badass?...When they do that shit and you're all like wtf I'm tired of this BS,...if we're gonna educate their ass we might as well sign to them in their face cause signing is the shit, ain't it? Make THEM feel inferior because damn, we're tired! Besides, they ain't paying us to read their lips, thats a job that don't pay, fool.

If they aren't at all receptive,...fuck it,..let THEM walk away with their tails between their legs!

We tired!"

Roberta:
"LoL, tricia.

Now that is BADASS. I should try that because I take a pleasure out of watching them feel like a fool :)"

Tumblin:
"Sign to the cashier, mailman, mechanic, neighbor, relative,..whoever:

Hey,..what? You never met a deaf fool before? Damn!" "Where's your pen and paper dumbass?" "Whoa you got thick glasses mofo" "Shit, whats that smell?"

But don't forget ...to smile when you're done.
Most hearing folks get scared if you don't.

They say" They crazy!"
Yea, we are..."

Roberta:
"LMAOO!!! That shit is funny!! BUT BUT BUT, you will be a fool if they actually SIGN BACK! :)"

Tumblin:
"Nah,..that's when you sign,..'pah someone aint a dumbfuck!'"

We can't spell audism without u.

2011-04-22T04:19:00.000-07:00

Here is a long story short:

When I introduced a hard of hearing woman by the name of Angela to my hearing friends, the first thing she asked them was:

"Isn't it true that I speak better than DeafJeff? I mean, I have a hearing aid and he doesn't."

My hearing friends couldn't understand her question so they asked her to repeat the question? After requesting that she repeat the question, they still could not understand her. So for the third time, she repeats the question and yet they still couldn't decipher the inarticulate words that came forth out of her mouth. She finally decided to sign to me what she was asking my hearing friends.

I repeat to these hearing friends what she had been trying to ask them.

Their response:

"DeafJeff clarified your question for us and that in itself is your answer."

I later introduce Angela to a good friend of mine, Cassandra, who is Deaf and communicates solely using American Sign Language. The two of them spent the afternoon laughing and joking in ASL. They seemed to appreciate the ease in communicating this way. Each understanding the other.

Later on, I catch Angela continuously referring to Cassandra as "that deaf girl". When she started that, I started calling her HOH Bitch.

Rather suiting dontcha think???

*chuckle*

Now,...on a serious note though...what we have seen in Angela is a perfect example of how audio centric values brainwash Deaf children as they grow up to be adults.

The Naysayer Defined

2011-03-27T08:31:00.000-07:00

The naysayer will never understand Deafhood until they see past wanting something they do not have or losing something they do have, be it speech or hearing. You see, the naysayer, for as long as they respect English more than any other language and as long as they view American Sign Language as just a communication option, they will not understand Deafhood.

What to do with the likes of these people?

Ahh...jes ignore'm and carry on with the things that matter. I mean, if you look at it right and review the timeline, these people are really seeking out answers and wanting to find themselves. Perhaps when they do, they can start loving the rest of us who accept our being deaf, having a unique language, and culture of our own. That, me friends, is what Deafhood is all about.

But.....what does a fool like me know?

What is Diversity?

2011-03-03T10:41:00.000-08:00

Whoooo-EY!

I couldn't help but roll my eyes when that guy told me it was all about diversity. He was saying that in order to understand diversity, you must be tolerant of others and their choices. Sure, I got that part just fine but the part I didn't get was: how in the world are we practicing diversity when we're force feeding Deaf children audio-centric values? I just can't see how that is being diverse. If the world were truly diverse, they'd embrace Deaf culture and Deaf culture would embrace them.

But, as I must say, it ain't so...

So, seriously, tell me how is diversity practised when you're rejecting a culture that doesn't hold the ability to hear as one of its core values. You see, being able to hear is not essential in Deaf culture. That doesn't mean hearing people are not a part of Deaf culture. That doesn't mean we don't appreciate the arts which include music and songs. That doesn't mean you can't wear your hearing assistance technology. It just means, we don't revolve around the hearing ability. We are a proud people with a culture and a language that makes us rather unique. We respect that the majority of the people in this world can hear and we should hope that they respect us for that we are fine with not hearing.

I should stress the question, do they? Do they really respect us?

You see, I'm convinced that they, as individuals in our presence, respect us or at least try to. Yet from what myself and many others have seen, they, as a collective entity, do not. Deaf culture is rather looked upon as an oddity and that just ain't the way it ought to be.

Diversity.
Keep trying...

And Lord, did you see that guy who has been deaf all his life show up with an understanding of Deaf culture and use sign language before a Deaf audience to show off his new "Ferrari of an ear"?

Yeah, it's true, he is a part of the deaf community but he sure as hell ain't a part of Deaf culture. You see, he learned sign language. He created many friendships and, heck, he even founded a business where his target customers were Deaf people themselves. He has been exposed to Deaf culture and even values it enough to make his presence seen in the many deaf related forums and websites on the internet. It's all there for the folks to see. As strange as it may seem, one would think that if that guy wanted to function like a hearing person, he would carry on with the hearing world alone and cease come back to the Deaf world where a Deaf culture thrives.

I mean after all, he didn't like himself the way he was right? But no, he is still here. He is still Deaf only he can "hear". He comes back to the Deaf community as if he embraces our culture. He's just here to propagate and manipulate. He's doing what they've done to him. Now he's a expert twizzler. Ah, licorice anyone?

Yes, I know. It is not easy to watch someone do these things.

That guy is an outright audist and is obviously a proud member of the League of Dysconcious Audists. Oh yeah! These people wish to function and live like hearing people and no matter how hard they try to they keep finding themselves kicked back into the deaf community. They're the kind of people who are not comfortable with or do not accept themselves as being Deaf. Of course, in Deaf culture, we embrace who we are as being a really badass class of people. Does that guy?

You don't have to wonder long before you reach a conclusion.

So, you know, we could tout that all the problems are with the schools, the parents, the teachers, the methods and all that jazz. The real problem is the utter disregard towards a natural state of being that many are comfortable with. The sheer negligence of cultural values that have, do, and always will exist.

The real problem is YOU.

YOU accept that these injustices go on. YOU accept that people are ignorantly destroying a culture. YOU accept the idea that you're not complete the way you are. YOU accept that you're taxed without representation. YOU are submissively passive and allow these things to go on.

YOU accept that the future generations of Deaf children will be trained audists like that guy who keeps spewing words like "choices" and "diversity" all for the sake of distracting the general population from identifying a moral wrong in the shape and form of audism.

Maybe if you'd just sit back and let nature take its course, there wouldn't be so many stupid fucks come out of the hearing world's version of deaf education, talking like that guy.

The truth is, Deaf people have a language and a culture that is uniquely theirs.

That guy's submission to the hearing world's ignorance is a matter of grave concern because he is one example of the many people who enable these acts and forms of discrimination and oppression to go on.

So now, I have to ask you all this:

Are you going to just accept these things or are you ready to start blowing whistles with the rest of us? Whistles so loud that they themselves will wish they were Deaf!

So what are YOU doing?
Let's GO!

*Tweet! Tweet! Tweet!*

"We are traveling in the footsteps
Of those who've gone before
But we'll all be reunited (but if we stand reunited)
On a new and sunlit shore (then a new world is in store)

Oh when the saints go marching in
When the saints go marching in
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

And when the sun refuse (begins) to shine
And when the sun refuse (begins) to shine
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

When the moon turns red with blood
When the moon turns red with blood
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

On that hallelujah day
On that hallelujah day
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

Oh when the trumpet sounds the call
Oh when the trumpet sounds the call
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

Some say this world of trouble
Is the only one we need
But I'm waiting for that morning
When the new world is revealed

When the revelation (revolution) comes
When the revelation (revolution) comes
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

When the rich go out and work
When the rich go out and work
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

When the air is pure and clean
When the air is pure and clean
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

When we all have food to eat
When we all have food to eat
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in

When our leaders learn to cry
When our leaders learn to cry
Oh lord I want to be in that number
When the saints go marching in"

-Louis Armstrong

Join the National Association of the Deaf today!

2011-03-01T09:56:00.000-08:00

Why I am joining the NAD. You should too! Please go to www.nad.org and check out the many ways you and NAD can help each other.

Ahhh,...Pathetic!

2011-02-28T20:45:00.000-08:00

The following blogpost is solely based on my thoughts, experiences and observations into the past and present. The purpose of this post is to prick you, the reader, into a sense of curiosity, which in the end as I do hope, may result in some serious interrogation to bring the facts to the surface. Not for me or for you but for everyone to see and so it goes to be said that these things cannot be left unsaid.

Last night I got a little ring-ring phone call from Mr. Ed Emgee He was just calling to thank me for quoting him in yesterday's blog and he asked me to keep up the good work. Well, as we started talking he went on about the movement for a True Deaf Education, he interrupted himself with the question:

"Why is Catherine Murphy working at Gallaudet University? Do they know of her association with the PepsiCo letter?"

I was thinking to myself trying to figure out why he seemed irked and irritable. I sensed it was not the time to talk so I patiently listened to his words forthcoming. He went on to tell me how it was irresponsible of the board to even consider her for the job.

"She understands what hearing parents want for their children and she has learned that from the bottom up. I cannot understand how no one has even seemed to raise an eyebrow in the least. Is it difficult for you to see where this is going?", he asks.

"You know, I know this is serious. I can sense it but I'm not exactly sure what it is you're talking about. I mean, it is lost on me. What is your beef with her and the PepsiCo letter?"

"This is what they said, 'Murphy brings extensive experience to the position, most recently as director of communications and public affairs for the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing. In that capacity, she represented the association on a variety of deaf and hard of hearing advocacy coalitions, including as co-chair of the Deaf and Hard of Hearing Alliance, as well as before media representatives, and members of Congress and their staffs. Now tell me that I did not stand up to Alexander Graham Bell and his ridiculous pure oral evangelism in vain!"

"Ed, look man, I know it is easy to get pissed off about things but I'm still not sure I fully understand you. And no, you did not do these things in vain. You did them for that Deaf children may truly learn and be capable of seeing and loving themselves without the scrutiny of ignorant social norms."

"My reasons precisely. And why did they decide to break my heart on Valentine's Day? I have never felt so torn..."

"Valentine's Day? Excuse me?...What's up?"

"They sent me a little pink envelope which in it, was a black card that read in white letters: 'Gallaudet University today announced that several of its programs at the undergraduate and graduate levels will close in August 2013. This decision by the university’s governing board was made for the purposes of long-term planning and strategic resource allocation.' I initially took the first blow without trouble but as I read further, I could only wince and grimace at the words before my eyes."

"Umm, I didn't quite get all of that you said about the card they gave you but I reckon it was a pretty nasty note and..."

Suddenly my VP starts flashing and I see it's my friend Laurent. I tell Ed to hold on a minute while I answer the VP. He responds with a quick "sure" as I put down the receiver. Finally, I get the remote and answer the VP.

"Mon Dieu! Did you see that they've chosen to do away with the Deaf Studies/Deaf History graduate program. How dare they! Those sons-of-bitches think they can get away with something that is akin to genocide. That is stabbing it in the heart from the back!"

I look at the table where the telephone receiver lay and I quickly set my eyes back to Laurent who is obviously infuriated with the way things are going right now. I carefully, with much caution, tell him:

"Yeah, Ed was telling me about that. He feels heartbroken and deeply troubled. He was telling me how he feels he has done all this hard work for nothing. He was gravely concerned with the fact that Catherine Murphy is going to help AGBell achieve his ultimate goal of forever separating Deaf children from a Deaf Culture."

Clerc with a stern look and fiery hands responds: "Like HELL they will!" He restlessly moves about in his chair and tells me he needs to get a drink. So while he runs off to get a drink, I scurry back over to the table where the phone is:

"Okay, I'm back. I have Laurent on the VP and he is also very upset by this. I told him that I had you on the phone and what you had said to me. He was furthermore enraged and had to fetch himself a drink. Hey Ed, don't worry. I will tell them what you said and they will get on it. They always have. We just need to present the facts. Forget about protests. We are going to question them and bring them down to their reasons! The truth will prevail..."

"Jeff, that's a good idea but remember. They have planned this for many years. They've chosen to be selfish and dishonest in order to maintain any inflow of power. They don't care who Jeffrey is once he becomes an adult, it will not matter. He will get a job. He will be kept occupied. He will have a wife and kids. A mortgage. Three car payments with insurance in tow. He will be paid and he will be taxed. He will be forgotten. You must tell them about..."

Immediately the phone starts picking up static and is cutting in and out.

"Hey Ed? Are you there? What is it you want me to tell them about?"

"Jef.....about.....aga....eee"

The line was picking up all kinds of static and whine-like noises that I couldn't understand any thing at all. I looked back towards the VP to find Laurent reading "Deaf World", a Deaf centric magazine. I attempt to figure out what it was Ed wanted me to tell them about.

"Dude....are you still there?"

________________dialtone__________________

"Sacre! Those blasted people will go to Las Vegas for a deaf exposition and other such vices. They didn't use their time in the summer to plan a strategy that would ensure the continued preservation of Deaf culture, sign languages, and the excelling in the professional training of Deaf people. They just want to bask in the deceptive comfort of self-interest because they're sold out and so...."

[*******************Flash********************]

My VP shuts down and there is no power. After fidgeting with the remote I get up to check the phone which is also dead. I then walk to the front door to look outside, when all of a sudden, I fall and hit the floor.

*BANG!*

Here I am on a Saturday morning, still lying on the floor while the sun penetrates through a crack between the curtains of a window and slowly it slides onto my face. While I laid there recollecting myself and remembering that I had been somewhere and talked to a few someones, I rise to my feet and casually walk into the bathroom to urinate. While I'm on this "You're a peein'" tour of my dream, I mutter to myself about sharing my lucid dream with others that they may care but immediately I scorn myself:

"Don't be silly!...This is the world of apathy. No one is going to care about anything you say."

Do You really want that?

Deaf Culture.
Deaf Education.
American Sign Language.
Eradicated.
Removed.
Gone!

Can you see it happening?

Please don't wait til it is too late, til it's your job, til it's your school, til it's your language, and your culture. Do something about it. NOW!

Demand Truth and Seek Justice.

The above blogpost is solely based on my thoughts, experiences and observations into the past and present. The purpose of this post is to prick you, the reader, into a sense of curiosity, which in the end as I do hope, may result in some serious interrogation to bring the facts to the surface. Not for me or for you but for everyone to see and so it goes to be said that these things cannot be left unsaid.

A Cup of Honesty

2011-02-27T22:40:00.000-08:00

Gallaudet was considered a moderate and an advocate for effective and humane deaf education. He advocated for an approach in which Deaf educators were relied upon to educate Deaf pupils through bilingual instruction. Nothing else matters.

Edward Miner Gallaudet
b. February 5, 1837
d. September 26, 1917

"E.M. Gallaudet took the rostrum to denounce the widespread erroneous beliefs concerning the deaf: namely, all deaf children can learn speech; oral schools receive all pupils; the best oral results cannot be obtained where the sign language is employed; signs can be banished from schools for the deaf; orally educated deaf are more fully restored to society than manually educated deaf; sign language is an imperfect and crude means of conveying thought; and orally educated deaf will not associate with each other after graduation."
pp. 363

"Gallaudet's views placed him on a middle ground between Clerc and Bell. He had, after all, launched the movement that brought articulation training into the residential schools. He had coined the term "combined system" and aggressively espoused its cause- oral instruction for those who could profit, sign for the rest. But he was vigorously opposed to banishing sign. It was not that he wished to safeguard the signing community; like Bell, he opposed intermarriage of the deaf and even their organizations. It was rather that he believed education of the deaf in spoken language was impossible. 'The great body of intelligent instructors,' he wrote, 'are agreed that no error could be greater than to expect all deaf children to succeed in learning to speak. The supporters of pure oralism from the days of Heinicke to the present time have hugged this delusion to their hearts and, as a consequence, the education of hundreds and thousands of deaf children in Germany, France, and Italy, who have been cruelly stretched on the Procrustean bed of a single method, has been more or less of a failure."
pp.366-367

"He claimed that oralism had not fulfilled its promises and he raised the question of whose testimony should carry the most weight in determining whether it had kept its promises or not. The teachers'? But they are partisan and too familiar with their pupils' speech to make an accurate judgment? The testimony of friends and acquaintances of the deaf? They, too, adjust to the poor speech and gestures of the orally taught pupil. The opinions of strangers? Their testimony is more important. But the greatest weight should be given to the views of the deaf themselves. You can imagine how those remarks were greeted by oralist teachers, who had repeatedly excluded the views of the deaf! But even harsher words were to come. Gallaudet raised the question whether oralist educators were defective morally. He stated that they were engaged in a cover up. It was hardly possible that these teachers were deceiving themselves about the poor fruits of oralism, so it must be that they intended to deceive everyone else."
pp. 411

"'If I am in the minority of the hearing section, I am in the majority in the section of the deaf, and proud of it. It is inadmissible that you refuse to speak with the deaf. They have as much awareness of their rights, as much discernment, and as much determination as you do! They are the first to be affected by these proceedings, they have the right to be heard. I protest your attitude.'"
pp.412

When The Mind Hears : A History of the Deaf
Lane, Harlan, 1984

The Advocate and The Audist

2011-02-26T23:35:00.000-08:00

Please read the excerpt below and tell me what it tells you.

"Bell placed assimilation into the hearing world above the mental development and professional training of the deaf. 'If we have the mental condition of the child alone in view, without reference to language, no language will reach the mind like the language of signs.' But that could not be the main view because 'the main object of the education of the deaf is to fit them to live in the world of a hearing-speaking people.' When the conference of principals meeting in Minnesota placed on its agenda the question 'What is the importance of speech to the deaf?' Bell was flabbergasted: 'I am astonished. 'I am pained....What is the object of the education of the deaf and dumb if it is not to set them in communication with the world?'

Gallaudet: 'That is one object but a small part of it.'

Bell: 'That is one object and the greatest of all objects.'"

When the Mind Hears : A History of the Deaf,
Lane, Harlan, 1984, pp. 365

Convo Relay understands Deaf culture.

2011-02-25T10:22:00.000-08:00

PAH!

Here is a big kudos to Convo Relay for understanding Deaf Culture and taking a stand on behalf of it. Convo Relay is truly exhibiting a strong "of, for and by the Deaf" attitude which is certainly going to strengthen itself as a business because it will garner loyal and faithful customers who appreciate a business that puts them, the customer, first.

Check it out!

So what's wrong with Alexander Graham Bell?

Well....

Alexander Graham Bell, the man and the association are one and the same. You see, if you study your history and review the time line of the AG Bell Association for the deaf and hard of hearing, you will see that the following quotes and sentiments stated by the man himself are still, to this day, deeply rooted in association's philosophy and pedagogy.

"We should try ourselves to forget they are deaf. We should teach them to forget that they are deaf."

"I admit...the ease with which a deaf child acquires this sign language and it's perfect adaptability for the purpose of developing his mind; but after all, it is not the language of the millions of people among whom his lot in life is cast."

"I would urge the abolition of the sign language."

"To ask the value of speech...is like asking the value of life."

"The adults who use sign represent our failures; let us have as few of them as we possibly can."

*tsk*tsk*tsk*

Oh and did you know that it wasn't until the Americans with Disabilties Act was written into law that the AGBell Association for the deaf and hard of hearing provided signed interpretation of their conferences and workshops?

Now, if you truly embrace yourself as a Deaf person, or any person, who values a unique culture and American Sign Language, please support Convo Relay and let them know that you appreciate their efforts in supporting us. Please contact them at feedback@convorelay.com or better yet, give them a thumbs up on Facebook. By supporting each other, we can tear down THAT wall of ignorance and finally begin to heal as individuals and as a community.

With Convo's advertisement and courage, they are demonstrating for other businesses one of the many ways to spread an important awareness that is good, not just for Deaf people, but for the world at large. So for your bold efforts and firm stance, Convo, we cannot thank you enough. Muchas Gracias!

....and they truly do.
Do you?

Pride and Denial : Serial Killers

2011-02-19T14:17:00.000-08:00

Frances spoke alright. She could even hear a little and lipread some. With this, it was determined that she should be mainstreamed all the way through high school. She was an average student that made good marks on tests yet was always behind in her school work. Her social life was uneventful and limited because she could never really keep up with the chatter of the Gossiping Girly Gals and, of course, the Blue Balls Boys only seemed to like her because she was a young lady with a nice body and a pretty face. What friends she did have, only seemed to come around when their other friends we're busy or away and had no other choice.

You see, for Frances, high school sucked really bad. So bad that she contemplated suicide often. She would cut and scratch her arms and fingers, punch herself in the face, and she would pull her hair out in a fit of rage. She would cry and moan her way to sleep in the cold corner of her room while the door was locked.

"Mama, I'm not happy. I hurt inside. I don't feel right at school and all the other kids make me feel stupid. They don't understand that I can't hear the way they hear. Sometimes I wish I didn't even exist because it hurts so bad when they make you feel like you don't exist."

"Baby, I understand. They just don't understand. You're better than they are because you can do so much and you don't hear like they do! Just forget about it and remember. Daddy and I love you so much and we are proud of you."

"But Mama,..."

"Shhhh...don't worry about them. You're doing just fine and before you know it, high school with be over. (long pause) So...have you done your homework and decided which colleges you're going to apply for next year?"

"Daddy, Will you hate me if I want to drop out of school?"

"Now Frances, don't be silly and start getting these wild ideas. You've got one year and a half left of school. You've always been strong young lady and you're almost on your way to college. Keep your chin up and remember, you can't afford the 'luxury of a negative thought'. Have you decided where you want to go to college?"

"Well...Yes,..I've thought about going to University and State as well but lately I've been reading good things about Gallaudet University. Did you know that it is the only liberal arts school for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing in the world? They use American Sign Language there and there are a whole bunch of other deaf people like me. They even have a class called Deaf Studies!"

"Frances, dear, I'm not sure that is a good idea. Your father and I did not work hard with you and your education only to have you go to a college for the deaf. You need to concentrate on your opportunities out there."

"Your Mom is right. You speak really well and you've scored higher than your classmates on your SAT. It would be several steps backwards for you if you were to attend Gallaudet. I strongly feel Gallaudet is not the place for you. I'm surprised you've even considered it."

"Ugh! You guys always tell me what to do and you never take into account how I feel and what I seek. You have always told me what was best for me according to YOU and YOUR ideals. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT I NEED! Get the fuck out of my LIFE!"

*BOOM*

The Vanity of a Voice

2011-02-13T11:35:00.000-08:00

You see a 23 year old young man, Jackson, introduce his girlfriend to his grandmother who is celebrating her 85th birthday. He attempts to articulate and fingerspell her name but stops in the middle of his effort and runs off searching for something. He returns from his truck with a notepad and a pencil.

"Grandmother, This is my girlfriend Liliana."

Grandmother takes his girlfriend's hand and asks her if she can hear. Liliana shakes her head in place of saying "No." Grandmother doesn't seem too impressed with her grandson's girlfriend but carries out a curt smile towards her, looks her over once, and walks away into the kitchen.

...no big deal...

Jackson and Liliana spend the afternoon checking out the house that he grew up visiting since he was a baby. The Big Barn in the backyard. The Tool Shed. The old rusted tractor that has forever been engulfed in a sea of weeds. Jackson told stories about games he used to play with his cousins and the wonderful barbecues his uncles would cook up. Lily was intrigued and eager to meet her boyfriend's family. She was in love with Jackson and the times spent with him had been some of the best in her life to date.

"Does anyone in your family sign?", she asked with him curiosity.

Jackson' head dropped a little and his shoulders slouched as he replied,
"No..."

Lily seems perplexed and asks with subtle amazement written all over her face,
The "No one?"

"Nope, nobody...hey, let me show you the Big Oak Tree in the pasture. C'mon, let's check it out."

They walked way out there to a huge tree and did what young couples do. You know, all that kissing and giggling and hugging and some...

...Good times...

When dinner time came around, they gathered at the table with the whole family present. Mom and Dad. Uncle Bill and Uncle Mark's families. Grandmother and Granddaddy. The Whole Family. Before passing the dishes around, they began the meal with a prayer in which all tilted their heads down as Granddaddy began to recite his dinner blessing. Jackson and Lily were the only two who did not look down. They looked up at each other, each one engrossed with the other. Nothing else mattered.

"I Love you."
"I Love you too."

With the blessing said and the dishes passed, they ate as spoken words were exchanged over and through their presence. The laughter was not shared. They really didn't care that they were not included in whatever such joy it must have been. They had each other while these conversations went on. They ate, played footsie, and made silly faces. Mom brings out the birthday cake with a few candles lit and everyone gathers around Grandmother as they sing to her.

We go with it like a routine.
La La La....la-la-la...La La La...
Ha-ppy Birth-day...
...To...You...

Grandmother looks at Liliana with disbelief and hollers to everyone, "She told me she could not hear but I just heard that young lady sing beautifully. If Jackson keeps her long enough, well, we might just be able to get him to sing as well."

Everyone laughs.
Liliana fakes a laugh.
Jackson does not.

Uncle Mike approaches Lily and asks her to ask Jackson if he wants a beer. Jackson's niece, Zoey asks Lily to sing to her, "Twinkle-Twinkle Little Star. Dad is hitting on Liliana. Aunt Kathy is asking Lily about her haircut. Suddenly, yes, suddenly she is important. Everyone wants to talk to her and get to know her.

...Why is this so?....

Grandmother hands Jackson a note with a tear in her eye, "Your girlfriend speaks really well. Don't lose her, I like her and I love you. Thank you for a wonderful birthday, I am happy for you and Lily."

...Why?...

What is an "Oral Success"?

2011-02-07T11:04:00.000-08:00

Jimmy was considered an oral success. He said all his words and sounds the right way. He never had to repeat himself except when he didn't understand what was being said to him. His parents were so proud of him and his speaking ability that they bragged about him to friends all over the world. Jimmy can mimic sounds and imitate people. He is just a really darn good kid. You see, Jimmy was considered an oral success for much of his life but it wasn't until the day he turned 18 and finally got up and spoke for himself that he truly WAS an oral success:

"FUCK YOU Mom and Dad for never taking the time to learn American Sign Language!"

Flipping the Tables

2011-01-31T09:43:00.001-08:00

Terlingua Tales: Two Jeffs and a Mean Old Bastard

2011-01-25T19:17:00.000-08:00

One morning, Old Man Ken wakes up at sunrise, takes a step out the front door and sees a still drunk dude, by the name of Hearing Jeff, sleepin' in a truck that was conveniently parked in his front yard. He rapidly shakes his head left and right, goes back inside briefly, and returns with his tennis shoes on. He quickly walks towards the demon red truck and bangs on the window and as loud as he could state, he said:

"This ain't no campsite! Get your ass up and out of here!"

The beer smelling Hearing Jeff is stirred up a little and slowly begins to rise. He looks like real shit with his hair all matted and his eyes swollen puffy. A Real Living Shit. He takes one long look at Old Man Ken and immediately begins to cough and gag intermittently as one eye shrinks and the other one bulges. He rolls down the window and continues to cough in a violent way that causes Old Man Ken to back away.

"Whoa!....What the hell?..."

The coughing slowly starts to recede and immediately thereafter the beanie headed hairy Hearing Jeff, in an agonizing manner, starts to collect the phlegm lodged in his throat and obnoxiously spits the gnarliest looking dookie on Old Man Ken's sneakers. This causes Old Man Ken to react in a burst of raging anger. He jumps closer to the window and kicks the truck's tire with his phlegm smeared shoe then slams his hands on the hood like a rabid chimpanzee. He exclaims once more with his fists clenched tightly and jerking in front of Hearing Jeff's face.

"You hear me?! I said this ain't no campsite! I'm so god damned sick and tired of you bums bumming off of bums that are already bumming off of other motherfucking bums. I said get your ass up and out of here and I mean now goddammit!"

Hearing Jeff gets out of the truck and responds to the old man as he unzips his pants and commences to urinate on a nearby greasewood bush.

"I know that, you mean old bastard!"

He continues to pee while Old Man Ken is pacing in his steps going four this way, four that way, and stops cold in his tracks as he notices another hairy looking beanie wearing fool show up out of the desert carrying a sleeping bag and a sleeping pad.

"Who the fuck are you?"

The new guy doesn't respond to Old Man Ken's question but does greet Hearing Jeff:"Good Morning Jeff, How'd you sleep?"

Jeff replied coughing once again,
"Like shit...".

The disgruntled old man loses his patience and yells,
"I asked you, 'Who the fuck are you?'!"

Hearing Jeff ignores the old man as he talks directly to the new guy and together they get in the truck as they prepare to depart from Old Man Ken's front yard, when the mean old bastard decides to ask the new guy, who was driving, an important question.

"What!?!? Are you Deaf?!?!"

The new guy rolls down his window and offers Old Man Ken a hand,
"Nice to meet you, I'm Deaf Jeff. Have a good one!"

But of course, Old Man Ken would have none of it.

The two Jeffs look once at the old man, once at each other as they light up cigarettes, and turn forward to face the long and dusty trail that lay ahead. They waved out the window towards Old Man Ken as they drove away watching him through the rear view mirrors. He was standing there with his bewildered self slowly fading away in a cloudy heap of dust.

Aye, yi, yi, yiiiii!
Viva Terlingua!

Hands and Hears

2011-01-23T22:48:00.000-08:00

Have you ever...

2011-01-14T17:54:00.000-08:00

You know, there is nothing like waking up to a world where The Natural screams supreme. Absolutely nothing! Where the mountains rise steadfast hues of blues with radical rays of sunshine piercing upward from the southeastern horizon. Ah, lo and behold, these are the Chisos, rising up and stretching their arms as if to yawn out the Window and take a deep breath of Dawn's sweet delight. Nothing screams louder!

...And yes,..there was light...while the child stares in awe...

...Ever seen a waterfall of clouds?...
Ever felt water spirit through dry canyon walls?
Ever been to the bottom of the ocean?
Ever thought you'd be one to go?
Ever lived to love it so?
Ever cared for another to know?...
...Have you ever?...
Has it ever......
occurred to you....
...That, you, must be True?
Has it?...
...Has it ever occurred to you?

Perhaps you need to sit down and think about it. You might want to say a prayer or two and do what the heart tells you to. You see the Choice, that is entirely up to you. You can either be an arrogant and stubborn imbecile or you can be True. Like I said, it is all up to you.

Good Morning. eh.

...So as the Sun rose higher and higher, Creosote and Agave began to sip on beads of dew while Jackrabbit hopped through an arroyo. Scaled Quail was perched high upon a hill keeping a wary watch for Old Man Coyote, who had, through much of the night, scattered Quail's humble flock. Up higher are Vultures on the ridge with their wings spread out basking in the morning warmth, anxiously waiting to get about their Scavenger Hunt.

Dawn has passed and the skies are blue, the Clouds unseen, the Wind absent, and for one moment, yes, just one, all the world was reverently silent for the Truth. In that one moment, the Truth had this to say:

You cannot run from yourself. You cannot hide your shame. You cannot chose another to blame. You have only yourself to hold responsible for the things you have chosen. You must bear these things for they have your name on them. You must accept what you have been given and what you have chosen of it. Learn and move onward. Another dawn awaits. Seasons come and go.

The Wind picked up and started to whisper while some clouds were being born, "Ever seen things change?"

I love this Desert.
The best Teacher anyone could EVER have.

Childish Games and Silly Names

2010-12-21T13:47:00.000-08:00

You all are quite a hilarious lot. I take 3 or 4 week breaks at a time and I come back and what do I see?...Good Lord Sweet Jesus,...You fools are still bickering about this and that which amount to absolutely nothing but power trips and brownie points. You gotta drag in names and you gotta point fingers and you gotta use silverware. Hell! Get the tar and feathers. It's just pettiness and ugliness and nothing but pure stupidity. It's a puerile, juvenile, and immature commotion. To put it simply, you're KIDS!

...I talk of both camps. (yep, all y'alls!) and that goes with saying I'm no holier than thou...

When I got into this thing, this whole internet hullabaloo,..I got into it because I had the desire and passion to share my experience as a d/Deaf person so to better enrich the experience for the next generation of d/Deaf children. I've bounced through it all and yet, I won't say that makes me the qualified and knowledgeable person to speak to when referring to such things...

Each child is unique.
Each set of parents are different.
Each professional has their own opinion.

Come what may, but one thing is for sure, each child will experience audism on a regular basis regardless of speech and hearing ability. Don't like the word? Well,... deal with it. It's right there before your eyes and it is obvious. How do I know this? Because I've never failed to find a situation where I couldn't explain it to both hearing and deaf people in person. Again, y'all don't like the word? Oh well....I call it on them when they commit the crime. And that's a fact, Jack!

Not to shroud them with guilt but to expand their horizons.
Don't be ignorant.
Be ye aware.

As for a sound language development. I'll vouch for the bilingual approach that utilizes all skills and abilities in order to acquire fluency in both languages. I mean,..who wants to be a monolingual? That is like, so old and uncool. When referring to a d/Deaf child and the bilingual approach, the use of American Sign Language and English is very effective. Now, you wanna turn your neck and grind your teeth when I stress ASL instead of PSE, SEE, AVT, or you and me. Well,..the problem hasn't been the language or the modalities or the methods or the technologies but the fact that there are not enough good teachers out there who truly understand what a d/Deaf child needs.

And what good teachers there are, they either quit or phase out of there careers because of your ridiculous ideals and demands when it comes to IEP's and the like. That's the problem. These good teachers are silenced when IEPs that purport to meet the needs of Deaf children yet only fail to do so because of audistic ideological hoo-ey.

Shame!

It's not deafhood. (I'm sorry you don't get it) That's a given with anyone with hearing loss whether or not they identify with the word deaf. It's not the organization and the non-profits with their own goals and objectives. It's not the parents or the teachers. It's the idea that being d/Deaf is not acceptable.

That's is audism.
Again, you don't like the word?
Then get the fuck outta here!

I come with nothing but the Truth.
I come with no affiliations.

But for all you know,..
I'm with the deaf terrorists and militants.

Bottom line:
We all are suffering because if we weren't, we wouldn't be bitching here about taking sides, proving points, gaining ground or losing it. I don't care what it is, just be honest and...

...grow the fuck up and stop feeding on hypocrisy y'all.

Sinning Silver and Toasty Taters

2010-10-31T00:52:00.000-07:00

That morning, the sun never came up. The clouds hovered overhead. The rain came down and so with it went the temperature too. Pay no mind to the fact that your neighbor in the next campsite over has bags of fresh game hanging in the trees. Everything is all quartered up. The deer has been tagged and you're shivering.

Bang!
You're it.
Then you remember,... right,...

On the road up here to this purty canyon there is guy standing outside of his truck, on the side of the road, not to mention the trailer and ATV's, with a two forty three on his shoulder and a pair of binoculars in his hands. I reckon he has a big freezer and his fambly hungry. Sure looks it. I can see the desperation in his eyes. One Shot.

Bang!
You're it.
Yes, you are.
Why? You ask.
I says uh'cause I can.
Dinner Time.
Chop-Chop.

Now here, hmmm, Nevada is the silver state and is probably one of the most mountainous states in the lower forty-eight. I mean, there are mountains all over this place. You can go East and West and North and South and still not escape a mountain. They're there and by Good Heavens! They are watching Thee. The Bristlecone grows here and is whooo-ey unique. Their evident tangles with the elements are yeehaw-unusual. We sit a spell. I Am overly intrigued by the Clarity of the Water that runs the Crick and how the Roots of Life are long and deep along this particular vein. A Leaf floats by as if to whisper in my ear that Autumn is here.

Verity is Clarity.
A-yup!
Yep-Yep.

When then the wind blows and the sandwiches are had. The Dogs have run their stretch and the Sun has changed His place. While She, yes, She, leadeths the way of the Living and the Loving and Learning, we cooly load up and roll on. The Road is long and winding but, yes, we must Go.

Straight, They said.
Forward, They stressed.
Onward with Faith, They Taught.

Those PARENTS before PARENTs before PARENts before PAREnts before PARents before PArents before Parents before parents before parent before paren before pare before par before pa before p before Before. You know, Ma Dirt and Pa Shine. Those Folks we know to be the best teachers of the Children. Truthkeepers. Foundation.

The Casinos, I pass 'em.
The Churches, I pass 'em.
The Brothels, I pass 'em.
The Signs, I pass 'em.

Nope, not in Our Path and besides, I don't play cards.

So North we go to Oh Why He in Nevada, you know not Vegas, and then and there I couldn't really see why he WAS there. What I do know is that Man alone is pretty selfish, men together are extra slee-zee. I seen it and I done it. Guilty as Charged. I'm a human with lustful desires that as a result bring me much discipline from those aforementioned Parents. Sometimes you are blessed and sometimes you are fucked, all of that though, comes with Reason we have yet to Understand...

Yes, as we'll have it, we crossed the state line with me in the back sitting on some blankets and pillows and books and a little of this and a little of that on me back. The little guy is napping and the Dogs are alert to the change in the air. She's driving. Mountain Home. Boise.

I see a truckload of Idaho's famous potatoes.
I see Boise State, famous for hard drives.
I da-fuckin' ho, YO!

So I caught a couch and a hangover in Meridian...
You see, I danced a little and sang a little.
Smoked a little and joked a little.
But most importantly, we Laughed-A-Lot.

Live-A-Lot.
Learn-A-Lot.
Love-A-Lot.

But of you and me, let's just say, you can keep your silver and I'll keep my Terlingua Poison. Speaking of which, you know what surely sucks? The difficulty in finding some Coyamito in Idajito. Chingada!

The Great Bay of Sin

2010-10-14T11:58:00.000-07:00

I done me some traveling in this Great Bay of Sin and yet I seen me some glories that flow down with the trickle of streams. Sure, this is a God fearing country and full of a some mighty fine folks. Oh, but of course, that is only if you're not of the Gentiles.

You see,...

Brother Jensen is torn between helping those outside of his faith and standing true to form. This is the way we have done things, this is the way we will do things and by God this is the way it WILL be.

But aye, me, I see..

There yonder walks a black man who until 1978 was not considered a worthy member of the faith. But, right, Satchmo didn't care, he kept right on playing and tooting his holy horn which sure put Moroni to shame, I'd say.

But that's alright..
To each their own Right, right?

And, o' course, we love a good country woman. Yep, those biscuits you make, Ms. Hatch, they're just splendid and I wonder if we can put some more in the oven. You know, give you a little token for my appreciation for all that you do. The Lord wills it so, I reckon.

Well, praise be.

There we are,...just couple of dirtbags riding in a beat up candy apple burro of a Ford. Pa at the wheel, Ma scrunched up in the extended cab, the little guy riding shotgun, and the dogs just a hootin' and a hollerin' in the back.

It's gettin' dark and the little guy is a-squirmin'.
A'ight, A'ight,...here we go again...
Head 'Em up and Mooove 'em out.
Git! Git! Git!

Git along now...

So with the Ruby Mountains to the left and the East Humboldts on the right, we go rolling northward over and through Secret Pass where you see the rolling hills come down from the mountains. The shine of sun shimmered on the these hills as if beckoning twilight to begin her dance. Pa is grinding his teeth, Ma's patience has run dry, and, whooo-ey, the little guy is really a-squirmin' in his seat.

Yep,...
Head 'em up!
Moo-ve 'em out!

Git.

Got to Lamoille Canyon, pitched the tent, fed the dogs, fed ourselves, and then right there, I said my prayers to forgive those who knowingly wallow in their own Great Bay of Sins and choosing never to reach out to the hand of Truth.

Tomorrow I will walk a mile extra.
Good Night.

Listen with thy Heart

2010-10-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

Truth is like a Mountain.

You can't conquer it.
You can't defeat it.
You can't own it.

It is there.
To stay.

You can't push it.
You can't move it.
You can't hide it.

It is there.
To stay.

You can't bend it.
You can't twist it.
You can't deny it.

It is there.
To stay.

Truth is like a Mountain.

Perhaps you may think that once you've topped it, that Mountain of Truth, that Mountain of mountains, you are in control. But why, oh my brothers and sisters, is it so, that we are only left without meaning when the crack of Thy light strikes nearby?

*crack*(FLASH)*crack*
One one thousand...tw..BOOM!

Perhaps we aren't in control?
Perhaps we are simply misled?

So...

...Listen closely.
Listen wholly.
Listen openly.

...and.

Be ye awake.
Be ye alert.
Be ye aware.

You are not alone.

and most importantly,...
...be humbled.
Accept.

You see, it doesn't hurt to be honest about bad things it just hurts to lie about good things.

The Son of Hayduke

2010-10-03T21:30:00.000-07:00

Yeah, they do look at him in an odd way.

At first glance, their heads are bowed down with their eyes on his sandals.
They look funny and foreign. His pant legs are rolled up like he has been wading in the water. They murmur amongst themselves and continue to gawk when he is not looking. His hair is pulled back and held together in a ponytail. He hasn't shaved and his teeth are kinda yeller. I reckon, he doesn't smell too pleasant either. Their eyes still noting every little detail and matching it with a judgment. He rolls up a cigarette and tucks it behind his ear.

"Hey look at the bum."
"Dumbfuck!"
"Subject has been identified. Over"

He sits on the city bench watching the tourist folk pass through while spending ridiculous amounts of money on shit they don't need. Of course, that is his thinking and his reasons are his only.

"It makes them feel better to think they own things. Vain."

A pigeon flutters beside him while he picks his toenails and he begins to talk to the bird as it draws closer to him.

"But really, people don't own things, things own them. They sign some papers, buy a nice house, fill it up with shit, stack up bills, add a ball and chain to their ankle, and become immersed in the artificial. They live in a world full of superficial relationships because they value reputation and images over truth and respect. Fuckin' vanity! It is rather deceptive and corrupting to and of those who are truly good and honest beings. So bird,... where shall we fly away to this time?"

They, the curious, seem to listen to his words not because they understand but simply because it is amusing to watch a man who appears to talk to himself. He grabs a toenail and sticks it in mouth to gnaw on. The bird is frantically trying to find the right spot. He hollers a few more incoherent words and startles the pigeon enough that it flies away. It is then that he turns and makes eye contact with the curious crew. They look away and act like nothing happened.

"Psst, he's watching us!"
"Change the light, I repeat, change the light."
"Don't look at him."

He gets up, throws his bag over his shoulder and walks towards them. They're now watching him from the corner of their eyes. He knows and he doesn't care. The street light signals that it is okay to cross and they, like ordinary sheeple, begin to cross the street. He casually follows them with long and exaggerated steps.

"Is he still there?"
"Yeah and he's still watching us."
"Dammit, I gotta pee."

They immediately walk into a T-shirt business and act like ordinary AmerIcans. He stops just outside the store they're in, drops his bag on the curb, and lights his cigarette as he leans on a parking meter.

"Fuck! He's waiting for us."
"Give me some money, I'm buying a shirt!"
"Bathroom."

He takes long and hard drags as he watches people blindly walk by. The mountains and the rivers are singing glory over the sound of the machine. He hears it well and looks up into a tree and sees the same pigeon from the bench. He looks back into the store then back to the pigeon in the tree.

"Shall we help them or are they not worth it?"

In the store, the three gawking guys are arguing about how to get out of this situation. One buys a shirt, one uses the bathroom, and the other paces nervously before the shelves of merchandise. He sees their uneasiness and decides that the time has come to do the deed. He tosses his cigarette onto the sidewalk, walks into the store, and approaches the fearful one of the three.

"Who are you working for?"

"Excuse me?"

"I said, 'Who are you working for?'"

"I' um, am sorry but... I do not follow what you're saying?"

"Do you think I'm fuckin' stupid? Who is your CO?"

"I need to go because my friends are leaving. I'm sorry."

"Ha, you're evading and now you expect me to believe that you and your 'friends' are going to leave me alone?"

"You're harassing me! Let me through!"

"No, correction: YOU and YOUR 'friends' are harassing many! You pry into the lives of innocent people. You scoop up information on them. You threaten them. You lie and manipulate things in a way that corrupts any chance for Truth to be in you. You follow orders and you whore yourself for their hidden agendas. You are afraid to tell the Truth because they will kill you and hurt your family if you disobey their orders. And do not think I don't know because, you know what, my old job was being YOU. So before I let you through, tell your 'friends' that the Truth always wins and that this line of work you're in will always be a burden to the health and life of your soul, your very integrity. The Death of Spirit has consumed you. You see, no one will trust you ever again."

He steps back and let's the jittery man through and then he eyes all the still faces in this tourist trap of a T-shirt store. He smiles big, waves at them, and right before he exits, he bows. Ta-Da!

Yeah, they really do look at him in a strange way.

Here is to Questionable Behavior:

2010-10-01T07:14:00.000-07:00

Barry said:

"A good thing I don't work for anybody otherwise my employer would have received tons of letters from people like Ridor, ASLEveryday, ASLitself and others.

I remember being accused of contacting Barbara Digi and David Eberwein's employers, which never happened. I waited patiently until a shred of evidence showed up about a year and half later. Barbara Digi and David Eberwein were able to secure copies of the letters and showed them to Ella. Ella acknowledged this in one of her video commment and stated that she personally saw copies of the letters and acknowledged that they did not contain my signature. Needless to say that I kept her video comment into my hard drive for future reference.

The boiling question is why did Ella, Barbara Digi, David Eberwein and many of their supporters allow the accusation against me to fly around for a long time knowing that the letters were not from me. I've yet to see the letters myself and am still waiting.

Ella, Barb Digi, David Eberwein and many others know the answer to the question but yet they have refused to leak this information, I suspect because it came from within their own circle of friends. Otherwise they would have spilled the beans long time ago.

Shameful."

Mike said:

"I've had many correspondences with people who explained how efforts were made to find dirt on them, commit false rumors, pry into their private lives, inappropriate contact with their friends and relatives, and even the contact of employers and bring forth false information as a way to somehow "get back" at people they don't like simply because of an opinion or viewpoint over certain deaf-related issues."

Karen said:

"Still, people making threats or calling people's employers out of personal vendattas... is upsetting and a sure way to create fear and distrust."

"Barry, you don't need to send me the copy... I believe you. At least, you are stating here on my blog that you had nothing to do with it and that Ella acknowledged it. That's good enuff."

Candy said:

"Oh yeah, people who do things like that, contacting anyone's workplaces, need to be EXPOSED big time! Very much in agreement with that."

And then Ben Vess said:

"After reading these comments and seeing that my name has appeared in terms of trying to refute some disputed facts between who said what.

First thing first, I do not have an opinion or statements regarding my feelings about such subject. It is too subjective for me and others to even have a productive dialogue. However, I will discuss facts.

Fact #1: Barry Sewell sought me out when he saw my blog calling Ella a coward and wanted to discuss ways to counter the opposition against "us" at the time.

Fact #2: During the whole DBC fiasco, there was DBC and then there was us.

Fact #3: Barry Sewell sent me three documents to be signed (very explicit instructions on how this should be executed. The documents were intended to be sent to the workplaces of these three people: barb, David, and Ella. All of the documents questioned their capacity to do their jobs correctly.

Fact #4: I was the one who passed the letters on to the people being accused. Yes, me.

Fact #5: Barry sent those emails to me and I still have them. They are free to anyone who wishes to obtain a copy.

I hope having these facts come into light will clarify some of your misunderstandings about what happened with these letters and how the three accused people got them."

Oh My!
Look what we found!

" From: "Sewell"
Date: July 14, 2008 10:10:55 PDT
To: "Benjamin Vess"
Subject: Next Step?

Hi Ben,
Appreciated your latest vlog. It's about time somebody stood up to Ella and call her a cowards because that is what she is. Can't have it both ways.. to lead a movement but hide in midst of questions and discussions.

Regardless, I'm thinking about putting together a group of concerned citizens and submit letters to CSD Fremont, CA Board of Education, Rochester School for the Deaf, NY State Dept of Ed, CAD and NAD to submit a copy of AIM meeting in which their employees and board members participated with radical comments against CI, Oralists and how Ella hijacked DBC and CAD to promote her financial interests in Deafhood Foundation.
Do you know of anybody that is willing to serve as the contact person for these letters? We need somebody that is outside of former DBC members. I drafted rought drafts for everything but just need to find a willing candidate to serve as contact person for "concerned citizens".

My thinking is since we can't seem to hold these people accountable we might as well make them accountable to the State and CAD / NAD. This way, they will have to issue public apology or face disciplinary actions. Once they do that then it will break them up and destroy the spell they are under.

Your thoughts?

Barry"

So now the question is:

Whodunit?
You tell me.

Questionable Behavior...
Que interesante!

Lastly, Barry, this isn't to destroy you,..it is to help you come clean. Of course, that will be left for you to decide what to do. We're not the enemies, we're the people who want the water of the rivers to flow as they should.

Truth.

As for comments and all,..expect them to be moderated this afternoon as I will be busy much of the day.

Peace!

A Note From Al

2010-09-26T21:18:00.000-07:00

Estimados Compadres,

A named Ed
had once said:

“One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork.”

Here's to you!

Now, you know, a person has the right to be stupid.
The court fool.
A Jester.

"Lowly virtue is the jest of fools." - some dead guy

And then you'll see old Will
with a bloody heart spill:

"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages."

"Judge not, that ye be not judged." -JayCee

So there you have it:

I'm an artist and a lover
I'm a writer and a brother
I'm a singin' and a-dancin'
I'm a screamin' and a-prancin'

"I'm ALIVE! I'm ALIVE!"

Yes, I've opened up me eyes.
So Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
And yet you say it is my demise...demise...demise...
Well, what I share are the words of the wise, the wise, the wise.

And then:

I wonder what you would call a person who watches a play they see as being dumb. I reckon it would be something to the extent of perhaps being a little dumbER for having watched it at all. I dunno and I really don't care. I've just been a wandering with a wondering and pondering that after much distance, I start to see how the name calling and the labeling are just petty attempts to keep oneself busy with their own ignorant social intellect.

Of course!
I hear stoical laughter.

Yeehaw!

Howdy Oxymoron, that's just plain entertainment!
Besides, Art always needs critique.

So to all of you,
Thank You Kindly.

Al Pendejo

Mis recuerdos...

2010-09-18T18:15:00.000-07:00

While driving home to South County from the Pine, I was recalling a trip I took with my family on the Copper Canyon train. We had left Los Mochis, Sinaloa early in the morning and were bound for Chihuahua by way of the Copper Canyon. The train, El Chepe, would take us through deep canyons passing tropical plants, corkscrew into a mountain, and along a rim through forest environs for the next 12 hours if all went well. You see, time in Mexico is always much slower and a lot more forgiving in a way that schedules didn't always dictate things. Things just go the way they go down in Mexico.

I was sitting in a passenger car looking out the window and peering down into the deep barrancas of the Copper Canyon country when my father tapped me on the shoulder and told me he wanted to introduce me to some people. I, having been through the routine many times, predicted he was going to brag on me a little bit and ask me to say some things and why not, show them what I know in Spanish. It was pretty normal and was the way I was brought up. Take note of the words "routine" and "normal."

So I get up and follow my father through several passenger cars as they swayed left and right while the train was rounding a bend. We reach a dining car and approach a couple. An older looking man who appeared to be in his fifties if not sixties, and a young woman who was likely to be in her early thirties. They were both gringos us and were also headed to Chihuahua like typical American tourist who rode the train. I smile and greet them.

"I'm Jeffrey and it is a pleasure to meet you."

The older looking man shakes my hand and replies with an intensely profound articulation:
"Nice to meet you, Jeffrey. I am *garble* and this is *garble*."

As he said this pointing to the woman next to him, I reached out to shake her hand and smiled.

"mag nahem his juhnahva, night met shoe."

Before I could ask them to repeat, my father intervened with the explanation that this woman, Geneva, was deaf and wore a hearing aid like me. I was initially surprised and had no idea what to expect when my dad wanted to introduce me to these people. So there I was, just 15 years old, meeting another deaf person. An interesting surprise.

I didn't use ASL and neither did she.
I couldn't hear or lipread her.
She couldn't hear or lipread me.
So what was the solution?

Well, I had to tell the older man what I said and he had to tell her. She had to tell him and he had to tell Dad and Dad had to tell me. I couldn't really understand the man's words because he said them with such an exaggeration that whatever he could be saying was actually foreign to me whereas she, on the other hand, could actually understand him. We couldn't connect even though we were both afflicted with the same problem. We were both dependent on the hearing people we were able to communicate with in order to communicate with each other. Never mind the fact that we were both visually attentive of each other even though we stood like statues.

I remember standing there on the train with Geneva staring out the window while I'm staring at the whole situation. My Father and the older man kept talking. They weren't talking about the trip. They weren't talking about the scenery. They weren't talking about Mexico. They were talking about us. There I am,..standing there with my mouth shot to the floor. The other deaf person is ignoring the situation by pretending to watch the passing landscape. I look at my father. I look at the older man. There talking about the very two people who are both deaf and wear hearing aids. They're talking about speech. They're talking about all that hearing perspective bullshit when these two subjected souls are left hanging with a reality that it is a hearing world and I'm a piece of shit because, dammit, I was born deaf.

What if we could communicate?
What if we could exchange thoughts and questions?
What would I have asked her?

"How do you like Mexico?"
"Do you know Spanish?"
"Where are you from?"
"Can you understand what they are talking about?"
"What do you do when that happens?"
"Why do you ignore it?"
"Why do you pretend?"
"Who said its not a good idea to make them upset?"
"Is that why you suppress your emotions?"

That is not happy and nor is it healthy but it is what happens a lot of times. Many would rather not upset others. They'd rather sit down and let the world of the hearing roll like it is "supposed" to be than to break the hearts of those who refuse to accept us the way we are. Yea, let's just keep supporting the lie.

She looks out the window and pretends to fall asleep. Father and the old man are still talking while I slowly crawl back to my passenger car, find my seat, and soak in that sinking feeling that I'm a dog who's master was done. The tricks have been shown and the treat given, which was meeting another dog. I thought about it all the whole way down here to Terlingua and I hope and pray that Geneva is happy today wherever she may be. Maybe she got a better hearing aid and went to a better speech therapist. Maybe she got a cochlear implant and that helped her speech and hearing in many ways. Maybe she swallowed a pill and became hearing!

Halleluia!
Maybe she did.

That, however, will never erase the memory of the fact that we both felt pretty shitty during and after that encounter on the Copper Canyon train nor will it change the fact that she may never learn to communicate with another deaf person who uses American Sign Language because she was drilled, both literally and figuratively, to subscribe to the idea that it is better to hear and speak than it is to use an effective American Sign Language with all people, both hearing and Deaf.

Just a story for me friends,..
Back in Terlingua and it feels good!

la paz,
Jeffrey

And Your Name Is Jacob

2010-08-17T15:05:00.000-07:00

Howdy!

I'm going to take the time today to write about my views pertaining to recent events that have unfolded on ASLRocks. You see, last week a young man came to present himself with having just received a cochlear implant. This young man wanted to share his views and experiences with having gone through the procedures of which cochlear implantation entails.

He wanted to debunk what he felt were myths and lies he had received from the Deaf community, perhaps his Deaf peers. In his doing of such, he shared his reasons why he wanted to get the implant and how he felt it would enhance his life. When he had these views posted on ASLRocks, there was an uproar of responses calling him an audist and several demands to have these views removed from the lineup of vlogs at ASLRocks.

Now, please note that this young man is sixteen years old, surrounded by an unawareness on the part of hearing people, encouraged by such ideals, and just had his surgery done last week. He still has much journeying ahead of him and he has yet to experience the outcome of his decision to receive the implant.

So where am I going with this?

Well, I want to talk about our responsibility as a community. It is my belief that we have a responsibility to provide love and support to those who are still learning about themselves and their place in this world. We have a duty to guide them, with our knowledge and experience, in a way that is not harsh or abrasive. We should, instead of attacking him, be asking ourselves questions.

Why does he feel he needs an implant to be equal to hearing people?

Why does he feel communication is a struggle with hearing people?

Why does he feel ashamed to be deaf?

Why is he here at ASLRocks?

Before we make assumptions and jump to conclusions, we need to be ready with the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps he is here, not to advertise a product or an ideal, but to find support whilst sinking under the pressure of a hearing ideology. Perhaps he is confused and has put himself forward as a cry for help. Perhaps he is doing this for his parents and not himself. There are many possible reasons why he brought his vlogs to ASLRocks. We need to inquire further before we reject him and abandon him in the hands of the very pressure that took him to the operating room.

To kick him out and call him an audist is to shape him in a way that he becomes another Russell Errigo, another Barry Sewell, another Richard Roehm, another naysayer, another angry and bitter person. We, as a Deaf community, already have enough opposition going against us and we needn't add to that.

It is our responsibility to be helpful to these people no matter how much their decisions and views may make us uncomfortable. It is our obligation to provide guidance for them so that our culture may thrive and our language may expand. It is our duty to welcome them no matter how lost and confused they may seem to be.

It's not Jacob's fault that he feels this way. It is the fault of the establishment and his surrounding environment. To shun him from our community would be to reinforce the arguments of the audist establishment and THAT would be OUR fault.

So what is it going to be, eh?

Roto-Rooter to the Rescue

2010-08-16T17:03:00.000-07:00

Good Evening Good People!

I would like to take the time tonight to explain a few things about a particular blogger who has, over the last few years, twisted, bent, disregarded, and corrupted a few good people with his skills in manipulation.

How has he done this?
Eyes, eyes, eyes.
Lies, Lies, Lies!
Hides, Hides, Hides.

A rather evasive little guy.

Alright. This particular blogger has a habit of disregarding worthy comments and discussions for the sake of making himself seem like the good guy. Yes, while it is his blog and it is his right to do as he wishes with it, I'll show you a good example of his tactics and in the end, perhaps you will understand where it is several of us are coming from.

He likes to assume.
He likes to attack.
He likes to degrade.

Don't believe me?
Check out:

http://theholism.blogspot.com/2010/08/last-stand-prayers-have-been-answered.html

I want you to read closely what he says towards Shelley Potma and yours truly. Surely you will see his traits in his words.

Anyhow,..I contacted Shel, who was also engaged in the discussion with this little guy and she has shared with me a particular comment that this little guy has opted not to publish. Of course, as aforementioned, it is his blog, his right.

But look and see how he plays the game and attempts to make himself the good guy of the discussion:

Below is Shel's comment posted here with her permission:

" Semantics, Barry. You missed my point, which is the fact that the Native Americans have been underdogs, most definitely, regardless of whether they massacred Custer's army or not.

Today, Native Americans are still struggling with the government's view and treatment, though they are definitely making much progress in getting their lands back and respect of society and political clout, but it has been a long, hard road for them. Aboriginals succeeded in wringing an apology from our Prime Minister. Yet, we have the Caledonia issue in Ontario. Do read up on that.

Speaking of lack of hands-on experiences… I was at Ipperwash Beach (a privilege, I must say) with the Deaf First Nations people at IDC conference which was held by the Oneida (at their reservation). (The First Nations finally got it back from the Ontario government after a stand-off that resulted in the death of Dudley George and a black eye for the Harris government.) Do not tell me that I know nothing about Native Americans. Heck, I was born near a Blackfoot/Cree reserve, and grew up with Blackfoot, Chippewa Deaf as well as Inuit Deaf at my school, and witnessed a few examples of racist behaviour against them, such as cutting off their hair (out of fear of lice) while leaving the hair of white kids alone!

You're correct that the gov't attempted linguistic and cultural genocide and failed, but they came damn close to succeeding, you must admit. Several tribes that existed long ago no longer does, such as the Beothuk in Newfoundland, for example. The numbers of First Nations People in North America is nowhere as great as it could have been had it not been for the greed of the white society in the past.

Residential schools for the Native people are testimony to their genocidal attempts, and do not tell me that it was the white man only who told me of the horrors that occurred in those institutions. I also heard from my Aboriginal friends, and read books from both sides as well! There is something to be said for ensuring that you benefit from a combination of reading information and stories as well as interacting with people and obtaining hands-on experience.

You should know better than to make assumptions about the people against whom you are embroiled in debates! You know what they say about people making assumptions.

You won't listen to my sources, some of them who are also First Nations themselves, and not collaborators at that? A pity.

Oh by the way, Barry… re: your contention to Jeffrey that the Indian Removal Act of 1830 has nothing to do with the Battle of Little Bighorn in 1876.

Ah… au contraire. Those two situations were merely part of the government's implementation of their plan to eradicate Native culture and language, and "tame the savages", and grab land.

Finally, on the topic of ASL, we NEVER said "ASL only"… quit spreading that myth. We advocate for bilingualism, both ASL and English.

This is the last time I will participate in this debate on your blog since you are more interested in putting people down than a genuine exchange of perspectives on an issue.

Have a good afternoon. "

There ya go,..if you do your homework, like he says, you'll learn to steer clear of this manipulative little guy. For if you like a fair debate, you can't find it at Holism blog.

Holism?
Nothing whole about Barry Sewell and his blog.
This post proves just that.

Ultimately, thanks for your time and patience,
Jeffrey

Further reading:
http://theterlinguan.blogspot.com/2010/08/puerile-battle-of-big-littlehorn.html

The Puerile Battle of the 'Big Littlehorn'.

2010-08-16T09:33:00.000-07:00

Dear Barry,

Whatever goes down in history regarding the AB2072 will not be as profound as your idiocy and arrogance. To see you pray against your enemies only tells me that you have failed to heed the words of our Father.

I do not write these words to you out of malice or aggression but as a fellow brother. You have spent countless hours putting people down and you have allowed your bitterness to conquer the good in your heart.

People erect monuments so that future generations will not forget what has come and been done before them. However, in your case, your words and actions have been so monumental that we will not forget no matter how hard we may try to. I should hope we will be able to forgive you.

I find it rather obnoxious of you to use Custer as an example because despite the fact that his army fell at the Battle of the Little Bighorn, the government still achieved what they set to out to accomplish.

This may, too, be the case of those whom you have erroneously called the "radical 'D' people", the "extremists", and the "closed society" as history has shown that a truth bearing people may fall only to rise up stronger, bolder, and wiser.

The Native Americans have yet to rise...

Finally, I will pray that you may find the strength not to be stronger than your brother but to defeat your greatest enemy, thyself.

Jeffrey

Wasting Away in a War of Words

2010-08-10T20:29:00.000-07:00

Illegal Alien.
Illegal Immigrant.
Foreigner.
Gringo.
Haole.
Outsider.

We're bitchin' about English terminology on ASLRocks! WTF?

And wetbacks????

The Mexicans cross a river.
The Europeans cross an ocean.

Go figure.

All in all,..you guys gotta fucking grow up and remember why we are so moved to get into issues like this. We've been hurt. We've been ridiculed. We've been belittled. We've been pained. We've been chastised. The one thing remains, we are all Deaf and yet,..here we are wallowing in a war of words against each other about all these fucking politically correct ways of saying things.

You wanna talk about hate speech?
Okay,..try this on for size:

"The only reason oralism is good for Deaf people is so they can learn how to properly say "Fuck YOU!" to hearing people when they turn their backs to the cries of a Deaf child."

That is hate "speech".

Call me a wetback because you know what,..I get pissed on by the audist establishment and so do you!
Fuckin' Wetbacks....

Stop squabbling.
Stop bickering.
Stop quibbling.

Fight for the future.
Fight for the kid who has yet to get hurt by such arrogant ignorance.

Real Eyes Realize Real Lies.

2010-07-30T09:50:00.000-07:00

Good Morning Boys and Girls!

Today we are going to talk about manipulation and exploitation. I trust that each and every one of you have done your homework and are ready to get into the seriousness of our classroom discussion today.

Who can tell me what the word manipulation means?

"Pick me, pick me!"
"I know, I know, I know."
"Mrs. Robinson, let me answer."

Alright, Jerome, can you please tell me what manipulation means?

"Manipulation means you get 'em where ya want 'em and when you've got 'em where ya want 'em, you can beat 'em and win your game. Yeah! That's manipulation!"

Ahh,..Jerome, can you give me an example of this:

"Ummm,..okay,..let's say I make a movie with some documentation of a historic moment and then tell everyone I decided to burn all copies of the movie except a handful of them. I call and tell my friend that I saved 5 copies and will be willing to sell one for 75 dollars when I actually have all copies to sell. The lie of burning them helps me profit more and sell faster."

Alright, Jerome, that's a pretty good example. Now, who knows what the definition of manipulate means?

"Let me tell you."
"Me, me, Me, me, Me."
"umm, umm, umm,..."

What is the definition of manipulate, Dominic?

"Manipulate is a verb that means to control or influence cleverly, unfairly or unscrupulously."

Wow, Dominic! That is a good definition. Where did you find the definition?

"My daddy showed me what it means. I learned from his example."

Oh, okay Dominic, thank you for your answer...Alright class, can anyone give me some examples of manipulators?

"Alexander Graham Bell!"
"Cochlear Americas."
"The United States Government!"

(!Extreme Baby Extreme!)

Wow, *ahem* I am impressed with you all today. You're hitting every nail on the head and you just seem to have done your homework. Good for you! Now I want you to tell me what exploitation means and you will need to give me examples of this.

(Insane! Insane in the Brain! Insane! Insane in the membrane!)

"When people ask my Daddy about my hearing aid or my being hard of hearing. My Daddy takes them through a conversation that became pretty much routine for the two of us. Yes, I have seen his lips say the same words and his fingers pointing to me and his ear. I have seen it many times. Daddy is telling them how my hearing aid works and how I've learned to speak. Daddy is proud of his son who was born deaf. He can speak. It was true, I could speak. So Daddy would have me stand there and ask me to say something to the person he was talking with.

I'd say something like,'Hello, I'm Rachel and it is nice to meet you.'

(Polly wants a cracker!)

My audience would either be surprised or uncertain, and there he was, at it again. Daddy is explaining the way things are about my speech and hearing. It's routine and I just stand there watching the words fly by while being asked to say something like a dog is asked to hand a paw.

Of course...

If it wasn't Daddy, it was a teacher, if it wasn't a teacher, it was a friend's parent, and if not them, it was a stranger. Those every day people who just don't know the difference between being and letting be. I was exploited by an oppressive ideology.

Exploitation is something these people do unbeknownst to themselves. Habit? Society? Ignorance? I don't know.

I've been exploited by them and my parents have been manipulated by them.
And 'by them', I mean those manipulators we talked about earlier."

*snap*

All is still in the classroom. Not a sound stirs and the air is stuck with a dense sensation to it. The second hand on the clock continues in its trance, tick, tick, tick, tick. There is a stunned look on the faces of these children. Mouths agape. Eyes wide. A bead of sweat drips from the teacher's forehead as she stares at the kids reaction to Rachel's testimony and explanation of what exploitation means to her.

Alright, Thank you Rachel, for sharing with us your meaning of the word exploitation. Can anyone give me another example? I am interested in seeing other examples and would like for you to share it with the class.

"But,..But..."
"Hey Miss, I want..."
"I feel bad."

What's the matter? Is there something wrong? Please tell me what is going on.

A brave and tough looking girl in a bright yellow dress stands up in front of her classmates and addresses the teacher's question with a sense of confidence.

"Mrs. Robinson, this whole school thing is not right if what they're doing to us is wrong. I just realized that what Rachel explained with everything, is just the same for all of us. They want us to use our signs for the holidays but they don't care to learn it. It looks pretty but that's all it is to them, just pretty. They don't see how signing is essential to us and when they want to show people, 'normal' people, things, they treat us like dogs. Sit. Down. Shake. Speak. They want us to come to this class to be normal. I'm tired of this cochlear implant because it doesn't work for me but I am forced to wear it or else my audiologist will give my parent's a guilt trip. And after that guilt trip who gets the blame? ME!

This whole discussion about manipulation and exploitation has me pissed off because it is wrong and I don't understand why it is still going on. Somebody needs to tell their parents to snap out of it and speak the truth against their lies and false hopes."

"Yea!"
"That. That."
"Serious True."

Wow, sigh, do all of you agree with what Jeanne just said?

All of a sudden, the whole class is rooting and roaring, hootin' and hollering, jumping and dancing. The students had finally reached a point in their psyche that they would no longer abide by the rules and laws of the oppressor.

Mrs. Robinson slowly sat down at her desk with great satisfaction. She had finally been able to get her students to see what it was she was trying to have them understand in the beginning.

You know, in being a teacher for the State, you're not encouraged to reveal the Truth. That's not what a teacher does in accord to those oppressive rules and laws laid before them. A teacher is to teach children what they want you to teach them. Not what nature wills them to learn.

Okay class, class! Calm Down class!

The students are still causing a ruckus and the commotion only grows louder as Mrs. Robinson, tries to get them quiet. The hands of children fill the air. Desks are overturned. A paper airplane cuts across the view. A couple of kids are merrily wrestling on the floor while supporters cheer them on. A boy is whining about gum being in his hair. A girl is screaming at a black spot on the wall. Everyone is everywhere and into everything.

Class, Class!
*lights flashing*

Still the students ignored the teacher and the flashing lights. Immediately after Mrs. Robinson flashed the lights for a third time, the Principal was standing in the doorway with his huge and ugly arms crossed in front of him.

Mr. Graham was not a nice man and he was known for being the meanest principal in all of deaf education. He had beady eyes in a big old head full of stiff grey hair that went undisturbed every time he'd shake and shout.

"WILL YOU ALL SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP!?!?"

The students slowly began to stop what they were doing and eventually all of their eyes were laid upon this grumpy and groggy principal who, once again, shouted at the class.

"DID YOU HEAR WHAT I JUST SAID?"

The students laughed at the puzzling articulation of Mr. Graham's words and resumed their state of pandemonium.

"DO YOU HEAR ME?"

One little boy, Donald, looked at the principal and walked up to him. He tugged him on the pant leg and waved to the principal. Mrs. Robinson, now wary of Mr. Graham, grabbed Donald's shoulder and asked him to stand clear of all the confusion.

"YOU. WILL. LISTEN. TO. ME."

Right then and there, the children went still. Silence was playing on the breeze when the students looked once at each other, then turned to look at the principal, and with a collective grimace, they gave him chorus of raspberries.

Pfffft!

That day changed the lives and attitudes of those deaf children. The students never forgot the day they realized the lies they were taught adopt and believe. From that day forward, they learned to tell the truth instead dragging around the lies that they were thrown.

As for the audist establishment, the practices of exploitation and manipulation continues to engulf families with deaf children.

Still...
Mrs. Robinson was fired.
Mr. Graham is still in charge.
And I am crazy.

Moral of the story:
You fuck with them once,
then you've fucked with them one time too many.

Triple T:
Tell The Truth.

Can you now realize that real eyes see real lies?
Cut that shit out.

Gone to Hell. Yours truly, A. G. Bell.

2010-07-24T13:42:00.000-07:00

Ahhhh, an update from Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing.

"You don't say?"

A-yup,..those guys finally stood up to say something "new" only to fall back down on what we all know to be OLD! Old as in "same old". Of course, let me give you a little heads up before you carry on further down. You see, this week was the week history was made in beautiful British Columbia. The week that the International Congress on the Education of the Deaf declared with much regret that the Milan Resolution of 1880 was downright wrong. Wrong!

"Are you serious?"

Yes'ir and yes'm...that is the right there bottom line truth! The INTERNATIONAL congress (hearing folks included) declared that such a resolution was very destructive and oppressive to deaf people and get this, it took them 130 years to come forward and admit such.

"Why so long?"

Well,..that there brings me to tell ya like it is: AGBell is a big bad bully with lots of lunch money in his pocket and is willing to do whatever it can to continue to be that big bad bully who is hooked on collecting lunch money from the likes of innocent people. Parents and children, that is!

"Is that the truth?"

Uh-huh,...sho nuff,..I got a way to give you a little glimpse of this truth. So,... are you ready? Are you prepared to see how they milk it? (Was it lunch money or milk money?..I forget) Ahh, you know what I'm talking about.

"I'm READY!
Take it away!"

Awright,..here we go...*clasping my hands*

Below is a statement made by AGB in an update newsletter on Friday, June 23, 2010. Please read carefully as I will point out some sticky corners, for them, that were disregarded.

Read on...

International Congress on the Education of the Deaf Addresses 1880 Milan Conference

[On July 19 at its meeting in Vancouver, Canada, the International Congress on the Education of the Deaf (ICED) issued a statement to address events that occurred at the 1880 Milan ICED conference which determined that the pure oral approach was the preferred method of instruction for children who are deaf. According to ICED, “This statement ‘A New Era: Deaf Participation and Collaboration’ was introduced to Congress participants as the beginning of a dialogue to promote healing and set the path for future collaboration.” In part, the statement “calls upon all nations to ensure that educational programs for the Deaf accept and respect all languages and all forms of communication.”]

There it is,..and WOW,...do they think we, Deaf people, are fucking stupid? I don't know because they cropped a sentence to make it sound like a good thing. As if it were to support them and their bullshit.

"What do you mean?"

Well, okay. I would like to stress something here in regards to the statement made by AGB. They do not properly quote what the statement of principle says which is to: "Call upon all Nations of the world to REMEMBER HISTORY and ensure that educational programs accept and respect all languages and all forms of communication." You can see clearly that their statement has a twist in it which is aimed to divert the reader from understanding the truth behind ICED's statement of principle.

If we are to "REMEMBER HISTORY", we will see that for the past 130 years sign language has been looked down upon and regarded as an incompetent means of educating the Deaf. In my own eyes, the authors of this statement of principle are putting a protective measure FOR sign language rather than other modalities of educating the Deaf. So when I read the statement by AGB, I see that they are doing what they have always done. Divert, detract, and manipulate the parents and people who are involved.

In short, it has historically been AGB and it's cohorts that have not accepted and respected sign language, a language and a competent means of education and communication. Now, when one reads AGB's statement in regards to the ICED's statement of principle, they should recognize the dishonest nature of an ideal that has failed millions of Deaf people across the world and for those who are struck with disbelief by such evidence against AGB, let me say one thing: believe it!

This is, indeed, a "New Era" for an effective and just means towards the education, participation, and collaboration of the Deaf.

Hey Bell...
How's life in hell?

nyuk! nyuk! nyuk! nyuk!

Finally,...I hope you can see how they have been playing their cards for well over a hundred years.

*tsk* tsk* tsk*

The time is here...
The time is now...

Let's Blitz those naysayers with more truths like these, eh?
Whaddaya say?

*pufffin' on me stogie*

La Otra!

2010-07-20T18:41:00.000-07:00

You know down in Mexico. Life is a lot different. It's cool a place with lots of color and culture. However, if you're truly a foreigner to the land, the people, and the language, you'll pretty much stick out like the obvious, a person out of place. And say, if you got blonde hair and blue eyes,...whoo-ey! Sore thumb of a sight in the land south of the border. A bulls eye. A sure shot. Bang!

Turista...

The little boys swarm all around you offering gum. A newspaper. A shoeshine. Heck, a green iguana! Outside of this swarm are the hustlers on the street corners with you in their sights. Trapped in the plaza and wrapped by la raza. There is a nervousness in the air and the pigeons feel it as you blink your eye.

Mira a el gabacho, buey! Vamos a hablar con el, que no?

The shady men from the street corners gather around in conversation by an old statue of Benito Juarez. Some old women pass by them, crossing themselves. Padre, Hijo, y Espiritu Santo. You're walking over to a bench to soak it all in. You feel awkward. You don't really know Spanish but you speak a lot of English. Heck, you're just here because you wanted to cross the line. "Go to Mexico".

Hola Senor, chu wanth sometin?

You look at the one man that came up to you from the group. He's talking to you in your language but his accent makes it seem so foreign. You, the foreigner, get so damn antsy and mutter in response:

"No hablo espanol."

The man asks you if you want something again. You say a quick "No!" and look past him towards the group. The man before you smiles as the gold of his teeth shine with a glimmer of sun. He seems to chuckle at your being in such a jittery state of mind and confusion.

Quieres Marijuana? Quieres la cocaina? Quieres yerbas de el desierto?

You and your honky assed self sit there like a fool with no idea what this hustler is asking you. You move your knees in a furious manner and you see the group of men laughing at you while one holds a knife in the sun. Ah, the gold and the silver and shit if I know. You're scared.

"No Garcias!" is your fucked up response because you can't roll your R's. You tinkle a little in your pants and in a hasty motion you're out of your seat and away from the gold toothed man. You go across the plaza to the church and then behind the church you're walking fast and turning back every 3 steps or so. From the looks of it, you've half shit yourself.

Ja! Ja! Ja! Orale, 'mano, ese gringo no tiene huevos para Mexico! No tiene ganas. Pendejo...

I shake my head at Izaak and crew knowing those fools just love scaring a poor old white boy. I know, I am one. They love it and yeah, its kinda funny because everything is already foreign and if you want have a fun on the border,... just add a little salsa picante.

De Nada.

Anyway,.. what I intended to talk about was this: I had a friend go with me to Mexico once and we went down to Chihuahua for a few days. We stayed in a hotel in the downtown district and chilled in that area. Checking out women, food, and museums (the finer women are there). This is for me, just another trip to Chihuahua City, the capital city of Mexico's largest state. For me buddy, he's walking next to me as if he needs me to hold his hand. Lord, this guy was terrified of the third world. Never seen it.

The poverty freaked him out and the ninos de calle really got to him. Street kids. They were the city's survivors. Scavenging food. Hustling for money. Shoeshining. Bubblegumming. Kids that have already been drunk and they're not yet 11. Kids who have been beaten up and kicked around by drunkards and druggies. I'm talking like SERIOUSLY freaked him out.

All the while, the working class and the upper class and the lucky few with pocket change walk right passed them, los ninos de calle, to tend to the day's chores and necessary purchases from the market.

Christopher was impaled by a truth he'd never seen. He pitied them and felt sorry for them. It was almost like he saw those kids as failures and rejects forever. You know, that is what he saw and sure, I can't blame him for thinking that way because heck, we, gringos, were raised with soft conditioning and sheltered living. Raised with convenience and with demand for the self. These kids, they don't have choices. They gotta survive and if it means scraps from the trash or someone's discarded moldy tortillas, so be it. Gotta live, dammit!

Truth!

On our return to Presidio, Texas, he kept wondering about those kids. He kept thinking how they will never be anybody. He was telling me they need to get to a shelter or to a community center. I listened and I wondered. Then I thought to myself, Chris will never understand that they are not going to abandon their means of survival AND independence. They got thrown on the street as kids, unwanted babies, addicts for parents, or Mama and Daddy be dead. Abandoned. Kids taking care of kids, y'all. They have the KNOW-HOW from kids before them and those kids before them and so on! A center or a shelter means abiding to an adult. They'd rather live with a struggle than to succumb to authority.

The way it struck Chris with his way of thinking, had me pondering on his innocence. His not knowing. Not understanding. His ignorance. He grew up sheltered and with parents who follow this American Nightmare. They put caps on his soul and got him wired to work a certain way. The way they want you to think.

It never occurred to him, Christopher, that maybe one of those kids will become the next big leader. Or a man of vast knowledge. Or a man of great music. Or a man of great prose. Never once, did he think they could beat the odds. His narrow way of seeing told me that our country is full of some people who will always wear blinders to Reality and hold themselves superior in their reality. This got me thinking about the hearing world and the hearing loss consumers. Brainwashed. Hogwashed. Whitewashed.

FOOLS!

Quite frankly, we are all the same yet the only difference is,.. some can see the Truth in Living and some are just in denial. That denial benefits them and their reality. Their pride. Their greed. Their, oh yes, power! They ain't letting go of that. No Siree! Uh-Uh. (shaking me finger)

That is where "freedom" is actually a prison that keeps us from seeing things for what they are. It wraps the mind with your wants and desires and takes you away from what is fundamental and necessary for all of us. It corrupts the community. (Who is dropping bombs?) You are the I-Me people.

Democracy.
Capitalism.
Free Market.
Bullshit.

Can you hug someone who hasn't had a bath in a month? Can you shake hands with a person who hasn't had a roll of toilet paper in a week? Can you smile to the kid with the shit stained shorts? Can you wave to the skinny girl with bruises on her face and arms? Can you take off that fucking shield called comfort and actually free yourself from any judgment made upon or against such?

Can you, for once, let go of yourself and think about Reality? Truth? Justice?

I wonder...

Turn the TV on.
Rent the latest DVD.
Upgrade your phone.
Download the latest hits.
Take pictures of yourself. (barf!)

Selfish and numb you are.

That's why it is so hard for you to see why you should just let the things be, the way they be. They are better off left in the hands of the creator instead of bent to fit with the ideals of a system, man's system. But what do you know...

Pffft!

"A bruised reed shall he not break, and the smoking flax shall he not quench: he shall bring forth judgment unto truth." -Prophet Isaiah.

A Meeting of Truths.

2010-07-17T17:49:00.000-07:00

I remember one time when I was walking around downtown El Paso waiting for my bus to come in, I was approached by a black man who was trying to talk to me. I hadn't realised that he was there until he roughly tapped my shoulder.

"Can you spare me a cigarette?"

Sure, that is not a problem.
Take two.

Then he started smiling and seemingly trying to start a conversation with me. (Yea, I talk to bums because I am one.) I emphasized that I was deaf and couldn't hear for shit.

"You read lips?"
yeah, sorta.

I started ranting, as usual, about "all these fucking hearing people who try to make us like them" and the trouble with the Greyhound staff when using sign language. "Us deaf fools are a minority, fool."

He looked at me with cocked eyebrow and twist in his neck as if his head were hanging off his shoulder.

"Boy, you don't know shit about being a minority."

He exhaled a cloud of smoke through his nose and sat down at his spot, which was a bus stop bench. He suddenly slouched and looked grim. He shook his head in a violent manner as if he were shaking bugs off of him.

"I've seen some pretty fucked up stuff, man. You a white man and you got no issues with people discriminating your ass for having colored skin. Minority my ass,..youse white, boy."

I take a long drag from my cigarette and look at him in the eyes. I seen what he seen but yeah,..different circumstances and different reasons. He stared back at me and wasn't sure what was going on in my head.

I asked him if he met a deaf person before and his reply was,
"No".

I began to explain to him the hows and whys of a certain discrimination, one that is often difficult for the hearing to see and because of that, they dismiss the issue. One that is clearly present in every new approach and encounter. One that is not based on color but of sound. And the majority of them are,...you guess it,...hearing. I am a minority.

He looked at me with a sincere face and he said he was sorry for what he said.
I told him it was "all good".

We hung out at that bench together for another hour before I had to get on my way to Los Angeles. I earned his respect and he earned mine, brothers. We talked a lot about how the world is actually full of good people and how the system seems to be corrupted by the bad. We ended on a good note. I told him the good always prevails. He nodded in profound agreement. I gave him another cigarette and a hug in closing.

You take care. I'm glad I met you. I know I done good, because there's one less ignorant fool walking on the planet. I'm out. V

Before I could walk away he gestured to me a "thank you" with a tip of his hat and he pounded on his heart several times then pointed to me. It was a powerful meeting of Truths. We shared.

Audism is real yet compassion is eternal.

Music to my Eyes.

2010-07-15T17:12:00.000-07:00

Something happened today that does so happen often with me. I'd like to share with you a few thoughts regarding this recurring happenstance.

You see...

...many a time I catch people trying to see if I'm really deaf. These people usually do so approaching me from behind or when I'm preoccupied with something. They like to do it when they feel they have the chance to do so without being caught and it doesn't really bother me because I understand that they are either puzzled or confused with my telling them that I am deaf.

Same old story, same old explanation.

It's doesn't matter how many times or how many ways you can educate them about what being deaf is, in one's case, really all about. It matters little how much expertise, experience, or research you have done as that person of a people, namely the Deaf.

Smile.

You will be discredited either way because you're not representative of the Deaf and neither are you representative of the hearing. You're pretty much busy with answering the same old shite that they keep forgetting they had already asked.

How'd you become deaf?
Were you born deaf?
How come you can talk?

They want to get kids, deaf kids, to speak and hear. By saying hear,..they want to get them to respond to sounds whether or not the sounds are representative of those the hearing hear.

Ha! Twisted Twizzler.

You get a deaf child, let say with a "moderate" to "severe" hearing loss and you get them to use hearing aids and speech therapy. You get 'em quacking and yapping and mimicking and mirroring and you tell 'em that is the way it is to be "normal". You do this from the age of 2 to about High School. You get 'em smart and "successful" and then you tell them to go out to the world and be free.

ha ha ha ha
HA HA HA HA

Then you get those questions. Time and time and time again. Then you get those tests they do behind your back. Then you get 'em asking those same fucking questions that you answered the last time you saw them.

"Now, Jeff, were you born deaf?"

Yes, Jerry, for the third time,...I was born deaf.

"Well,..umm I just don't see how you can read my lips because you speak so well."

Ahem,...I'll tell you what,...maybe I should start bullshitting you, Jerry, and just stop using my voice and start signing. Let's say we do that and I'll maintain the same level of conversation with you only I will be using sign language. If we do that, are you honestly going to be as patient with me as I have with you and the rest of the god damn hearing world?

"Jeff, I think I understand what you mean and I respect you for being you because you have a gift. Sometimes I wish I were deaf because you know, there are times you just don't want to hear a thing. You know what I mean?"

LOL...LMAO!

Alright, so you, my reader, you see where I am getting at. Damned if I do and damned if I don't. The main idea is, hey, even if you get 'em, deaf children, talking and able to use a piece of technology, they, 'em herring, will STILL not believe you are telling the Truth. You can't be deaf. You must be hard of hearing. You must be hearing impaired. You're lying.

Cops asking me stuff in the dark with a flashlight in my face.

Homeland Security pulls me over at the checkpoint cause I asked them to repeat the question three times.

Local talk has it that I'm scamming them about my being deaf.

Then the in-betweens and the uncertain,...
They test me and they get caught.
Yep, ain't it so!

OR:

I had a buddy, Carl, who hollered my name about the same time I felt compelled to look back. Look back I did and there we go again. "See...you can hear!"

No nah naw
Hey now!

That's Bullshit.

Now lets go in another direction. I decide to sign and not use my voice. I maintain, or try to maintain, my patience. I'll sign and teach them. I'd put 'em on the boards like I would a racehorse. What are the chances this horse is gonna keep running? Will they quit? Will they continue?

I have yet to bet on a winner.

You see, because I speak so well and because I was trained so well to communicate with the hearing. I'm stuck and damned by them and their doubts. Always testing, or for others, always hoping. They want a child to become assimilated or immersed in that crap while the Sad Sun shines.

It's really a trip!

And say, did I ever tell you about the time I was 24 and riding in the car with my old man. There was some loud noise outside or on the radio or something that startled him and I reacted to his reaction. Well, can you guess what he asked me:

"Did you hear that?"

Sigh.

Forgive them for they know not what they do. And I try to do that every day. I try to let it slide and let it go but the more I think about that "hearing impaired" kid in the front row of his/her classroom at a "mainstream" program. Lined up like he/she were just like them. That's a LIE! The children, often, believe in that lie because it is, after all, a hearing world. It is easier to get them to believe that shit if you get at them when they're younger, try the Easter Bunny or Santa Clause. Not a hard one to understand, aye?

So should I sit down and shut up?
Should I let parents listen to the "specialists" and the "experts"?
Should I not care?

Am I supposed to forget what they told me to be true, which in the end, wasn't true?
The same lies their spreading to this day.

Honestly, I can't let this go unsaid. I can't afford to let another set of parents be manipulated and another child twisted up. It is a shame that they continue to allow this to happen.

Twist and Shout!
C'mon! C'mon! C'mon!
Baby Now!...

And you wondered why there are so many pathological liars in the deaf community...

Howdy!
Adios...

If you can feel the rage in my writing then you need to share this with parents of deaf children because I'm sure as hell they don't want their child to be like me. I want them to understand that what they might be choosing for their child can amount to some years of unpleasantness. You should listen to the soul of the deaf child before you throw them into the hands of the arrogant hearing world order. You, as parents, deserve to understand when a deaf person says:

A visual language is music to my eyes.

Hear Ye! Hear Ye!

2010-07-06T19:45:00.000-07:00

I write the following not out of hatred or distaste for the average hearing person but for the sake of telling the truth of the average deaf person. You see, in our rich human history, we, as deaf people, have been chastised for our lack of hearing. We have been labeled to smithereens and displaced as a whole. We are, as they have it, not normal and are a liability to the world. We are the rejects of a “normal” society and thus we fight such normality. And so it goes, in the eyes of humans, all MUST be normal yet in the eyes of Creation, everything IS as it should be, a part of the whole.

Hmm…

Is it not true that our American government has discriminated against other races? Is it not true that women have suffered from a male domineered ideology? Is it not true that the disabled have been limited in their abilities because of the assumption that they are a lesser variety? Tell me, my friends, is it not true?

Now, if you would, please allow me to share with you some quotes to help you see our history:

“Earlier today, we heard the beginning of the Preamble to the Constitution of the United States: "We, the people." It's a very eloquent beginning. But when that document was completed on the seventeenth of September in 1787, I was not included in that "We, the people." I felt somehow for many years that George Washington and Alexander Hamilton just left me out by mistake. But through the process of amendment, interpretation, and court decision, I have finally been included in ‘We, the people.’”
-Barbara C. Jordan, July 25th, 1974

“We are not fighting for integration, nor are we fighting for separation. We are fighting for recognition as human beings. We are fighting for human rights.”
-El-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz, 1964

“I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but my the content of their character.”
-Martin Luther King, Jr. December 11th, 1964

“If we accept and acquiesce in the face of discrimination, we accept the responsibility ourselves and allow those responsible to salve their conscience by believing that they have our acceptance and concurrence. We should, therefore, protest openly everything that smacks of discrimination or slander.”
-Mary McLeod Bethune, 1944

“If we are to achieve a richer culture, rich in contrasting values, we must recognize the whole gamut of human potentialities, and so weave a less arbitrary social fabric, one in which each diverse human gift will find a fitting place.”
-Margaret Mead, 1935

“Only to the white man was nature a “wilderness” and only to him was the land “infested” with “wild” animals and “savage” people. To us it was tame. Earth was bountiful and we were surrounded with the blessings of the Great Mystery. Not until the hairy man from the east came and with brutal frenzy heaped injustices upon us and the families that we loved, was it “wild” for us. When the very animals of the forest began fleeing from his approach, then it was that for us the “Wild West” began.”
-Luther Standing Bear, 1933

“The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in the insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well meaning but without understanding.”
-Louis Dembitz Brandeis, 1932

“Where justice is denied, where poverty is enforced, where ignorance prevails, and where any one class is made to feel that society is in an organized conspiracy to oppress, rob and degrade them, neither persons nor property will be safe.”
-Frederick Douglass, 1886

“The prejudice against color, of which we hear so much, is no stronger than that against sex. It is produced by the same cause, and manifested very much in the same way. The Negro’s skin and the woman’s sex are both prima facie evidence that they were intended to be in subjection to the white Saxon man.”
Elizabeth Cady Stanton, February 18th, 1860

A’ight!

These are just a few of the many examples there are to be found regarding certain discriminations and injustices that have been laid before us. I could give you so much more but I believe the above should offer you enough to actually think AND feel.

Now, Now, Now…here we go:

Deaf people are often discriminated because of their inability to hear perfectly and speak impeccably. They are not truly included as a part of the nation. They are restricted to the boundaries of vile assumptions that we are incapable, broken, and thus rejected. Would it be fair for me to say that hearing people are unable to learn signed languages or empathize with those of us who cannot hear? I should hope not. And why do they blatantly put hearing men and women at the risk of losing their hearing when they can replace them with those who are already deaf? Surely, deaf people can be given an equal opportunity to serve their country. Yet the answer is no. We are the oppressed and they the oppressors. You see, it is more profitable, for them, to increase the number of potential consumers in the hearing loss market than it is to diversify the country with various abilities. Shall we march alongside the fascist pigs? Nay I say!

Ahh, such ignorance!

The lukewarm and moderates are perfectly fine with the idea that the hearing are above us and they, being who they are, continue to reinforce that very ignorance which forces us to the subjection of a false authority. They are wrong and it is rather unfortunate that many cannot see this. I pray that they may one day awaken to the self evident Truth.

We deserve to be heard and by that I mean listened to. By that I mean felt. By that I mean understood. And ultimately, accepted as we are.

We will not stop our good fight.
We will not falter.
We will not die.

You will continue to have deaf babies come into the world. You cannot deny that truth. It is our place to be here so that you, the ignorant, may see that everything is a part of the whole. We are not gods! That includes you and your bullshit.

To reject your own truth is to deny your existence.

Be ye watchful of the things to come…for this is the dawning of a long awaited enlightenment for all deaf people in the world. The closed society is no more.

Watchful I say…watchful…

Truth Floods

2010-07-03T19:13:00.000-07:00

You know, out here in the desert, when it rains it pours. Every crack and crevice fills with water and flows. Every wash becomes a river while the roads turn into muddy bogs. If you get more than half an inch of nature's blessing, then you know it is time to consider using the four wheel drive. You see, our road isn't a bad road but, hey when it rains, it isn't a road at all. If you're wise enough, you'll wait for a couple more hours to let the Sun shine but if you have to be somewhere and you can't back out. I reckon that is when you have to consider the time needed to start walking the distance.

Got yourself a pair of boots?
Yea? Let's go...

Now, walking in the desert during or after a rain isn't the easiest thing to do. The first thing want to do is stay out of low places such as washes, draws, creeks, and valleys. Like I said, when it rains, it pours and when it pours it flashes.

Flood!
A prickly pear floats by...

Your boots get soaked and caked with mud. Hot spots surface on your feet. You don't see 'em but you sure feel 'em with the squishing and sloshing and the squeaking. Up a hill. Down a hill. Around a bend and through the acacia with their catclaws. Passing millipedes and tarantulas, who like me, are warring with the rain and mud. You wipe your wet face and trudge on with each boot weighing 10 pounds.

Gotta do whatcha gotta do.
Places to go and tasks to complete.
It's like that.

I'm thinking through it all.
D/deaf.

You know, yes, I am a Texan.
Yes, I am a Deaf person.

I got all that understood but I really don't need to be worried about that kind of crap when the argument starts from deafness to deaf to Deaf to deaf and back to deafness. I think we all understand that and if we do, why the hell are we still poking with it?

There are bigger fish to fry, ya know?

You can diss me with "disability".
You tell me, I speak well.
You can audit my audibility.
You tell me, I suck at ASL.

You can vilify me all you want and that is, as I've probably said before, mighty fine with me. I ain't gonna blame you for doing what you do because it's not your fault. You know whose fault it is but I know you won't stand to point the finger. It's also not your fault that you are like that. No worries, mateys.

I will keep walking and talking. I will keep sharing what no one can take from me and that is my deafhood. My deafhood is just as much my childhood and personhood. You wanna argue about languages and words. Fuck! If I signed this shit you would be standing there with bricks dropping out of your ass because it is not just ASL or English or whatever communication option I was brought up with. It's the Truth that even hearing people will understand.

Now you ask me where I get the confidence and the ego?
Ha! says the puppet poster boy.

Not bragging here, but man, I can get any person to listen to me and I can clear any argument with them when it comes to talking about the psychological and emotional side effects that come with the demands of a "superior" being. In this case, hearing people. So you as a hearing person, what do you know about people who don't listen? What do you know about not being able to hear in the midst of it all? That kind of ignorance! Know this, it is actually humbling to have these conversations.

Sure, it's a fact that they are many and we are few but that doesn't mean shit to me because there is more to live for than their vanity of sound. (Please note, individuals are not the system and we the people is more like wee the people)

The rain has stopped. The dirt is still and the mud is dry. Everything is clean! I'm still walking and I'm still talking while she listens.

I'm pretty CERTAIN that there will be a time when we are recognized and respected to a point that even the naysayer will side with the Truth and stand honestly comfortable with their being a Deaf person. Until that point, I'm still going to share my stories about my deafhood and I know you will continue to do the same. It is ongoing, never ending and the best thing about it, you can't have it taken from you whether you identify yourself as a little d, Big D, hard of hearing, or hearing impaired. No one can take the experience of being you, a person with less than perfect hearing, away.

It's yours and I think that is a pretty simple thing to grasp. If you want to get into semantics, I'll leave that to the people who want to avoid the truth and I'll move clear out of the way.

I don't need to be washed away in a flood of confusion. I know where I'm going and much credit for that goes to our creator. Remember, I may be human and I am far from being perfect, but I know I'm doing what I've been sent to do. I can't deny that Truth.

Children of Deaf Adults and You.

2010-06-30T19:44:00.000-07:00

She was born on October 29, 2002 in Frederick, Maryland.
Her name is Autumn Savana.

A week later her parents showed up at a gathering of deaf people. We, being new parents, were approached by several individuals who were interested in meeting Autumn. They would say their “oohs” and “aahs” and look at her for a few seconds and then bring up their itching question:

“Baby hearing or deaf?”
*curious eyes and fidgety lips*

Autumn is hearing.

“Oh.”
*face says: disappointed*

I remember the many times people would approach us with that question over and over. Each new person Autumn would meet had to ask that same old lame old question.

“Baby hearing or deaf?”
*fingers crossed*

She can hear.

“Means she got fathers genes because mother has the deaf gene. Oh well. Such a pretty baby anyway, she is darling.”

I remember feeling like I was the one to blame for her NOT being deaf. I remember feeling like I was a 2nd rate person in a 1st rate community because I do not have a deaf family and as we continued to live around Frederick and Washington D.C. the deaf community continued to ask that abrasive question.

“Baby hearing or deaf?”
*anticipation on face*

She is hearing.

“You know, it is important to sign with her because she is a Koda and they are a part of our deaf community.”

That’s right! Thank you. I was just about ready to explode before the next person was going to ask me that callous question. Yes, my daughter can hear and no, she isn’t going to be raised hearing. She’s a Koda and that’s the bottom line.

Now…Now…Now…

Let us fast forward to today. I was outside building an adobe wall whilst thinking about Kodas/Codas. You see, these people are some of the most unique people I have ever encountered in my life. If you’re not familiar with the acronyms then allow me to share.

K.O.D.A.
Kid Of Deaf Adult

C.O.D.A.
Child of Deaf Adult

These people have either one or two parents who are deaf and, naturally, they use the language of their parents, which is in most cases, sign language. There are, however, certain situations that a hearing child might have deaf parents that do not use sign language and that is often due to the fact that they, the parents, do not subscribe to deaf culture or use sign language. Is that clear? A Coda can either be proud or ashamed of being associated with the deaf and I will elaborate more on that further down.

Lets go back again and I will tell you about another experience I had with Autumn when she was four. Only this time it involves the actions of a hearing person. Please pay attention because this shit is going to get you thinking deeply about a few things in the whole (whole or hole?)

We, Autumn and I, are walking down a snowy street in Basalt, Colorado and are approached by a harried woman who seemed to want some help. Before she could explain in detail what it was she needed help with, I asked her to write it all down. She looked at me and rolled her eyes with a sneer on her face. The next thing she decided to do was talk to a four year old, Autumn:

“Tell your Daddy….”

Whoa! Whoa! Woman! Hey! First of all, I’m the adult here. Second, Autumn is four years old, my daughter, and not an interpreter. And lastly, I asked you to write down what you are saying.

“Can you tell your Daddy,..”

GRRRRRR!
Tsk. Tsk, Tsk. They may be hearing but they sure as hell do not listen.
We walked away and I held Autumn’s hand as I told her that sometimes hoos just don’t understand.

“I LOVE you, Daddy.”
I love you too.

Sigh

Okay, now here is where my thoughts get very interesting based on everything I’ve mentioned above. Deaf people praise deaf children of deaf parents because, as I believe, those children provide a source of hope for the community. Hope for a less ignorant hearing world, and that I can understand, but to the deaf community, I ask that you consider asking that curious question in a better way if you want to keep any hope at all. Ask: “Baby Coda or Deaf?” That way it is a win-win situation rather than a split or a diversion. You see, deaf people aren’t the only ones fighting to diminish the ignorance that so plagues the hearing world. Codas really kick ass and they do so because they’ve experienced the same, if not worse, kind of discrimination that uninformed hearing people impose!

Now, imagine an 7-year old Koda child sitting at a restaurant with her family and she hears a group of people making fun of people who use sign language or people talking about her parents in a way that makes her cry. Imagine this is only one instance of the many possibilities.

Whooo-ey!
Déjà vu.

Codas get used, abused, reused, misused and I know this because I’ve seen both the hearing and deaf take advantage of them. That is where we, as parents, made a promise to ourselves, being intelligent, capable, and independent people, never to put our children in the middle of our business with others. They deserve to be kids! If one opts to make an interpreter out of their child, if one selfishly uses that child’s hearing, if one conditions that child into becoming a personal secretary, they are truly vile, manipulative, controlling and in no way independent. They are selfish enough to be inconsiderate of the fact that they are sucking out the youth of that child faster than the world can do it alone. This is where the shame starts to surface and the Coda wants to be free from the deaf community. Aha! Another ally driven away.

Yeehaw!
Y’all know which horse I’m diggin’ my spurs into.
*kickin’!*

When a deaf parent USES their child to communicate with the hearing world, they are saying: “Hearing people are superior.” If you think using your child keeps you above par, think again because you’re just reinforcing the status quo (an ignorant hearing world) and declaring to the world how feebleminded you are. Hola!

I could go on and on with this but nah, enough has been said and I need to pull some more weeds out of the garden. ☺

Vain in the Brain!

2010-06-28T15:11:00.000-07:00

Hey!
Look!

No, No, No,..
Over there!
Yea, did you see that?

No?
Oh man...
You really missed it, huh?

(Well as you might have noticed, the people I brought up in the last blogpost have yet to respond to the questions I presented and of course, they probably won't ever see what I said because for all I know, I'm just a nobody, out in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do. Tsk. A'ight,...so be it :)

Now,...

I'm sitting on the brink along the Southeast Rim of the Chisos Mountains marveling at how a rainbow curves with a cloud's shadow whilst ravens and swifts swoosh through the air just a few feet above my head. The Sierra Del Carmens, to the east, provide the Sun with a canvas to paint oranges, reds, blues, and purples and I am in awe of everything in every way. With my arms behind me, my hands on the rock, and my feet dangling over the 1500 feet below me, I see that there beside me is a tough and courageous agave plant literally hanging on to the edge but doing so with a natural confidence. I chuckled with a huge grin after the agave seemed to tell me: "many a sunset!"

With a new day comes a new painting.
Now THIS is Paradise...

"I forgive you, I really do. I forgive you like a dog forgives a brutal master and I mean it, I forgive you for being such an ignorant person. I forgive you for using your skills and abilities in vain. I forgive you for forgetting and hurting us. I forgive you for being mean and selfish. I forgive you, above all, for forgetting (or denying) what love is.

I do, I forgive you, (place name here), for allowing hoovanity to swallow the best of you."

Sigh

...the sun is down and the full moon hangs from a glistening night sky. I think of you all while I am here and I ponder on the wonderful things we've learned, shared, and of the more good things to come. I know I am truly blessed to be in such a diverse community and one that is not so much defined by their experience or knowledge, but by the willingness to be honest with one another about who they are in that community and by that, enabling true diversity and sincere sentiments.

"I thought deafhood was such hogwash,.. but I realize now that I was wrong..."

"Deafhood people are elitists. Oh, what is an elitist?"

"It is better to do what hearing people do because the world is hearing. (Dammit, why do they always seem to make me feel inferior?)"

"The key to success is to appear successful at all cost."

You know,.. being honest is more than just telling "your truth". It is more than just being blunt. It is mostly about being clear with yourself on the wrongs you've done, the lessons you've learned, the flaws you DO have, and how you tried to hide those things. Honesty is about loving your true self so that others may love you for who you ARE. Honesty is being you and not a poser. You know what I mean.

Me entiendes?
You are perfectly fine just the way you ARE.
(How many times have I said that shit?)

I, like you, am deaf and I am aware that THEY, the hearing world, are not going to listen to our Truth until we can convince YOU to come out of your trained defense and denial of your flaws and misunderstandings.

'memba,..you ain't perfect, right?
That is YOU!

Of course, if you need TeePee to help you get that brown stuff off your nose, just ask me and I'll hand you a roll WITHOUT judgment. Now, now, now,...I'm not mocking you, I know this because I've been confronted by a freedom fighter before and she kicked my ass real good. (Got Scott?)

Again and again and again, I ain't trying to intimidate you or put you down, but I will do my BEST to slap some sense into you because hey, if anyone has been listening with the heart and trying to understand, it has been us, who know the traps and snares of such vanity. Be ye free...

Hey now,...
I'm trying here.

To Understand

2010-06-25T09:47:00.000-07:00

“Why the hell do you live way out there in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do?” they usually ask and I usually respond with a soft chuckle and smile on my face, “That’s why.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

Well alright, let me be clear here so I won’t have to go around this again. I live here in what you consider the middle of nowhere, because it is remote and isolated from a blind society.

“Are you calling me blind?”

That I cannot yet answer but what I can do is ask you this: “ Can you live way out here in the middle of ‘nowhere’ with ‘nothing to do’?”

“No.”

There you go, that is precisely why I live here and why you don’t understand.

-ahem-

Say, you know what is better than a deaf person who has some residual hearing and speaks well? It is a deaf person who can kick that deaf person’s ass without having to utter a word. Ha, Ha Ha! So much for your speech therapy and AVT eh? Whack! Whack! Whack!

I know I’m being brash here but hey, they can take it right? They’re all grown up and they love to play childish games, yeah. They are the people who love to feel good about them selves by threatening and putting down others.

You want names?

Lets try: Gina Alberti Sutton, Russell Errigo, Michael McConnell, Joshua Dawson, Barry Sewell, and Rachel Chaikof to name a few.

These sort of people are proud of their abilities and their accomplishments. They believe the fact that hearing people know what is best for deaf children. They resent the fact that they are associated with us in any way. Now, these people are not bad people and neither are they perfect. They’re just another group of folks with a certain ideology (results of brainwashing?) and system of political beliefs. That is their right.

What I want to point out to these people is that what they do, whether knowingly or not, is not cool. It’s not cool to walk around all snooty and snotty like those sneetches who had bellies with stars did upon those who had none upon thars.

You know, you all are a smart lot (???) and I can see that rather clearly but if you’re that smart, why do you have to go around pissing on people who might not be as privileged you have been. Is it that beneficial to your self esteem to go around telling people to learn to read, to do their homework, and holding hearing values to be superior to their own? I mean, seriously stating here, is it really worth it to do and say such things to these people when they go through the same kinds of struggles you do as a person with less than perfect hearing and THEIR struggles are likely to be greater than yours, is it really worth it?

You might call the terms audism and deafhood bogus and that is perfectly fine with me but you cannot deny that the meanings and experience of such proposed terms do exist. You can also see that our vocabulary continues to expand with our expansion of knowledge. Consider dictionaries from 1810, 1910, and 2010. Compare them.

I know you’re smart enough (???) to understand where I’m going with this.

Now allow me:

1. Have you experienced someone acting superior to you or discriminating you because you couldn’t hear perfectly or speak effectively?

2. Have you acquired more knowledge and experience about hearing loss than the average hearing person?

3. Have you experienced what it is like with life without a speaking voice or a hearing aid (including C.I.’s) on a daily basis?

If you’ve answered “no” to all questions, then I guess I was wrong about you. Maybe you’re not that smart and/or are brainwashed with some audist establishment propaganda.

If you’ve answered, “yes” to all questions, then surely you have an idea what we, collectively and wholly, as a people with less than perfect hearing are up against.

Okay, if you only said no to question three, then perhaps you might want to take back several things you have said and done towards certain people or at least review your comments. Understanding is to be had, eh?

If you think all three of these questions are stupid and pointless, then that defines you and your concern for the future of deaf children. Try to inquire more and dispute less. If you cannot do that, try, then, to get your head out of your ass. Just because you’re doing what is “normal and right” doesn’t necessarily mean you’re doing what is good for everyone. Besides, you’re not normal and you never will be, so get over it and move along with the rest of us.

If you can't understand any of this, let me just say, you’re no better than we are.

P.S. Those who have been named, find some courage to say something in response, eh?

Driving While Deaf

2010-06-23T13:29:00.000-07:00

You know it’s an ignorant hearing world when you take your truck to get the annual inspection done only to find out your truck failed because the horn didn’t work. Well, you know what? No one’s horn works for me, so what is the use.

Can deaf people get a driver’s license?
Are you kidding me?
I kid you not.

Sometimes these questions are presented to me out of curiosity and other times they ask me things out of utter stupidity. I mean, you talk about people using cell phones while driving, which is illegal in some states, or you talk about people who have their boom boxes and amps hooked up to the maximum. Now talk about distractions! Still, many don’t feel comfortable with a deaf person behind the wheel. Go figure.

Will you let me drive?
No, I’m the best driver I know, attentive and alert.

Well any way, I’m driving today down memory lane and I’m passing some experiences that I’m not quite fond of. This is the dark end of the street where I’ve left things to have the dust settle upon them. The first stop I come to is the Texas School for the Deaf where I spent a summer studying to get a learner’s permit to drive.

This was technically the first time I ever really stayed at the institution and I use the word because it’s the word we sign. It was probably the first time I encountered a Deaf of Deaf person. I was, to my recollection, intrigued to get to know how these deaf people walk around with an air of confidence and fluidity in their signing. You see, they didn’t sign with the stress of articulation interfering with their expression of thoughts and feelings. They didn’t care if hearing people gawked at them. They knew they were deaf and had no question about that. They were leaders and they were dominant while many of us were forced to sit in the back of the bus.

So there you have it. I stand at the bottom of the pecking order in public school as a hearing impaired fool. I go to a deaf school and I stand again at the bottom of the pecking order as a deaf of hearing oral boy.

I get back in my truck and drive a few miles down the road to a brighter end of the street and the next stop I make is at the Texas Lions Camp for crippled children. Yeah, that’s what they originally called it. I drive past some good thoughts and treasured memories. I wave to friends I’ve made and to girlfriends I kissed and danced with. It was here that I made friends of all kinds, each of us having a special gift or ability about us.

There were those who could not see,
There were those who could not hear,
There were those who could not talk,
There were those who could not walk,

All of us had a gift, a blessing to offer to the world.

I treasure this stop on memory lane. You see, I spent two weeks out of every summer in my life here from the time I was 8 to the time I was 16 and I enjoyed every minute I was there. I learned about people. I learned about myself. I learned about diversity. I learned about adversity. I grew up loving everyone and their gifts. I learned a lot about deaf children and their parents from this experience and this is more so, now that I am looking back on it all.

Almost all of the deaf kids who went to Texas Lions Camp had hearing parents. It is rare, if ever, that you would see or meet a deaf person from a deaf family at a camp for crippled children. They had parents who didn’t see themselves as being handicapped and they were conditioned with that notion. This enabled them, the deaf of deaf, a stronger sense of self worth in a predominant hearing world.

*sniffing the air*

I hop into the truck again and ignore the expired inspection sticker. A horn, HA! This time I turn around and return to the first stop I made, TSD. Once again the street grows dim and the air feels a little cold.

I get out and remember the day I sat in the cafeteria whilst being grilled by a deaf of deaf about whom I was and where I was from. I remember trying to fingerspell under such an embarrassing amount of pressure only to be mocked and ridiculed for being such a inept signer.

Oh! So it is my fault that I can’t sign for shit?

I remember hanging out outside the cottage with the other students. I sat on a picnic table whilst people seemed to sign about me and look at me and laugh. I look around and wish to find a tree to climb up or a hole to crawl into. Something! Then some brute approaches me and puts his arm around me and does the unexpected. He yells mock gibberish into my hearing aid and ignites a roar from the spectators involved. This cruel deaf of deaf guy then takes his arm off me and mockingly grabs my arm to shake my hand. He looks at me with a devilish grin, the wink of an eye, and with the thrust of his tongue along the side of his cheek he walks away back into the warmth of his little posse of clowns.

I didn’t know whether to stay there and be a joke or to walk away with my tail between my legs. I wanted neither of the two. I didn’t want to hang out with the hearing people and I didn’t want to hang out with the deaf people. I felt like everyone sucked and there was definitely no place for me to build a home for my soul. I remember that day. I was just fifteen years old.

My truck seems to whistle for me so I head back to it and drive off down the road towards the freeway called Life. All the while, I’m thinking to myself about the miles I’ve traveled through the deaf experience and my understanding of deafhood. I ponder on the things that either make us or break us. For some people, they open their arms to others in the deaf community and for others they want nothing to do with the deaf community. There are also those who spend their whole lives, like me at fifteen, with no place to go, no place to belong. They become isolated in their own little world and resort to a destructive lifestyle, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Now with the advent of our awareness of words like audism and deafhood, these very people have gathered their armor, arms, and artillery with the intention to retaliate back. You see, it is easy to remember the insults from hearing people but it is easier to remember the hostile insults from those who are like you. So, as a result, they spend their energies attacking their own kind because it is easier to side with the majority than it is to attack the majority because victory in that manner is more likely to happen.

-Sigh-

My truck is cruising at 55 down Life’s highway and as I’m driving while deaf, I keep my eyes peeled for other people who are looking for their deafhood. I am prepared to help them find their way home because we all deserve that much.

We deserve a sense of belonging and by that I mean we deserve to be together as a whole in a world that knows little about the Song of Silence.

A Time for Everything.

2010-06-22T14:46:00.000-07:00

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." Ecclesiastes 3:1

I came to read the book of Ecclesiastes whilst pondering on and praying for a particular soul. You see, I often say my prayers when I'm outside having a cancer stick and last night I went home after a little time at the local wifi joint to do just this.

Ahhh...

The night skies in Far West Texas are some of the darkest due to the remoteness and isolation from the rest of the civilized world and to partake in a praying session under such stars is amazing. You see,.. when I pray,..I have a conversation with those I know that love me and those I love in return.

Well, last night I was praying for this particular soul because I feel they need some love sent their way. Of course, this person has been very gruesome and cruel to a lot of people in our deaf community. In fact, so cruel that they have caused others to want to hate in return.

I know this because I have felt the hate.

When I feel the hate and the rage boiling in me, I have to remind myself to slow down and forgive them for what they do and know not. They are just as human as I am and by seeing myself reach such a boiling point, I can understand how easy it is to allow ourselves the expense of saying hateful things.

I have wanted for some time to attack this person with such an amount of vengeance and evil to the point that I would leave them feeling the pain of ALL the hate they have caused in our deaf community. Yet I realize that this person is struggling with one thing about herself, yes it is a she. She doesn't love herself as a deaf person and has opted to use her own self hate to hate others who love the fact that they are deaf.

She has opted to attack those who embrace....
She has chosen to belittle those who are content...
She had decided to smear those who are fine...

...with their being deaf.
You see, she is ashamed of herself!

And the worst thing she has set up for herself is that she has made it difficult for us to reach out to her and offer her a loving hand. We only want to help ourselves be free of being a self-hating deaf people. We want to spread the joys of being deaf. We want to teach others about the injustices that are thrown upon the lives of deaf children. We want to diminish the results that create this self hatred.

She has attacked us under a veil of anonymity thus choosing to wallow in her own self hatred, spread more hate, and shove aside likely friendships.

I feel her pain and I wish it would not stab any deeper that it already has. I prayed that she would for once and for all, find it in herself to embrace her own soul. The stars above me glistened and as I continued to pray, a shooting star come across me.

I felt I was received.

Now today, after much thought and time, I have found it to be necessary that it is time for her to peel off the layers of denial and look for once in the mirror to see that she is truly a kindred spirit that has only been troubled by the ignorance that plagues the world.

Particularly, Audism.

I wanted us, as a community, to be patient with her but the more I think about it, the more I know it is time to help her begin the healing process and yes, for some, tough love is the only way to go about it. Of course, the initial part of the process might hurt more than one can bear but how can we begin to heal what we have hidden until we have it identified and exposed.

Sigh.

I know the heavens don't lie and I have learned to take a time-out here and there when the going gets tough. Doing such enables me to better listen to the wisdom of a million years.

All day today, I thought about this person and our community. All day I kept questioning what we, as a community, should do about it. All day I asked the cactus, the mesquite, the agave, the birds, the wind, and just about everything I saw.

What to do?

Well, you know what I did?
I went to the Study Butte Store and bought a piece of candy and ate it.

Where is that candy now?
Gone.
Pau!

So, as a fellow freedom fighter told me, "There is nothing wrong about doing what is right" and I have to say that I agree. This calls for doing the right thing even if we fear there will be repercussions. Risks are necessary.

Hmm...

You know, I learned after 20 years of bullshitting myself into thinking I was better off acting like a hearing person than embracing myself and loving myself for being the person that I am, a beautiful deaf man, that the Truth is simply easier and much more natural. It is unavoidable.

It's time to show this person that we understand, even if it hurts in the beginning.

"Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion: for who shall bring him to see what shall be after him?" Ecclesiastes 3:22

The Song of Silence

2010-06-21T20:05:00.000-07:00

Summer begins! The desert is verdant, the creek is teeming with wildlife and cumulonimbi dance in the sky as she, the desert, displays such wonderful music. Ahh, I sit here beaming with the Sun yet I am under the protection of a Cottonwood's shade. Sweet bliss comes with the breeze! You see, this is the time of the year when the wisdom of the Chihuahuan Desert stands her tallest and when I am placed at my humblest.

Listen, she tells me.
It is silence that she sings.

That’s one of the greatest things about being a deaf person. You don’t have to struggle in order to receive such lovely melodies that play before the eyes and the soul. You know? The voiceless sing greatest when the all the world is silent. The Ocotillos sway in the wind like the bow of a fiddler playing such elegant notes. The Creosote bushes shake like the rhythm of maracas while a sparrow passes overhead in a flight pattern that resembles the song of a flute and still she, our beloved desert, sings when the wind ceases. The trickle of Terlingua creek flows with a gentle hum and the various colors of rock add a unique-ness to the music. The mountains moan behind the haze of the heat whilst vultures and hawks patrol the skies. All is a part of the song.

Listen, she reminds me.
This is the Song of Silence

It is also the time of the year when the heat becomes extremely unbearable for the thick blooded and thus they fly north to the cooler climes. Of course, with such a phenomenon, the locals of Terlingua are able to better appreciate her music.

No more trains of river runner vans going up and down the road.
No more herds of Harley Hogs in their dead cow clothes.
No more busloads of tourists from a foreign land.
No more private planes at the airstrip.

It is Summer!

Yeah, it is that time of the year and I’m rather glad it is here. It is that time, my cue, to return to the platform and stand up for what I believe in as Deaf Jeff. It is that time to tell my story, to tell our story, and ultimately: The Song of Silence.